Mingle2 Blog

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Keep 'em Separated

Posted on 06/13/2007 in Dating Tips by Matt

A friend of mine recently mentioned that she'd started seeing someone new and he apparently could set his own schedule at work.  In other words, he was free to see her anytime he pleased.  When you start seeing someone new you usually want to spend lots of time around them;  they're a new squeaky toy that you want to hug and squish until its eyes bug out and it stops squeaking.  My advice?  Take it easy.   Give each other space - especially when you're just starting out.  No one wants to be smothered right off the bat and you'll find their company much more enjoyable if you take it in small doses at first.  You only get one honeymoon phase, you might as well make it last as long as you can.

5 comments

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  • ineedsugarluv2 wrote on 10/29/2008
    I agree 100% !!! I have just recently started back into the searching phase after an 8 year relationship ended. The gentleman that I became to know on Mingle2 is a great guy!! We chatted through Mingle and on the phone for hours ata a time getting to know each other. Unfortunetly the pace of the relationship, only 3 weeks, picked up SO quick..I.E. Him introducing me to his 2 daughters and telling his Mom and Dad about me, I felt as though my entire world was a whirlwind,out of control and I felt very UNGROUNDED. I explained to him we needed to really SLOW down and allow some space to breathe..He is seperated from his wife but has not served her with divorce papers as of yet. Although he stated he was having them drawn up. Upon my pulling back on the reins to slow things down and feel more comfortable..He took it personal and said how much I hurt him by doing this. Now he is hurt but also states is very much in love with me. Remember we only knew each other for 3 weeks.. I explained to him my concerns about possible -rebound- with his wife and also that he needed to take some time to go through the emotional changes that are a normal course of any reltionship that comes to an end,"referring again to his pending divorce with his wife" SO that being said..TAKE IT SLOW when meeting someone new....Do Not push for something faster than it should naturally happen.
  • REDGIRL67 wrote on 11/27/2008
    I hate spending every waking moment with someone. Even if it's a new relationship I just don't want to spend a lot of time with them. Love my privacy!
  • MissIndependent69 wrote on 04/17/2009
    I agree also, I have a habit of wanting to rush a relationship or even when I meet someone.
  • Embraceme4me wrote on 06/06/2010
    In theory, taking it slow & easy may sem practical, but remember there are risks: 1) Unless understood clearly by both, taking it too slow can seem like lack of interest. 2) regardless of item 1, remember that someone else could enter the icture, someone that takes your new 'toy' by storm, and leaves you & your 'logical slow pace' alone. Smothering is no good unless both enjoy it, but communication must be open enough. Slow & easy may not mean the same to everyone.
  • braddaft wrote on 07/07/2010
    You love a woman tenderly,softly,they are delicate flowers who need love.My woman will be loved like no other in the world.Becouse you see there is more to loving a woman than just sex.I want to hold her,curress her and make everlasting love to her.So that she knows she is without a doubt the one person i love more than anything more than anyone.