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Topic: I keep trying and nothing seems to be happing Why ?
Jimmy59's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:05 PM
I have been contacting some of the most beautiful women in the USA on four dating sights now for three years in the making.

My question is there a language that these women speak ?

If so how does an older gentleman like myself learn this language In order to comunicate with these beautiful women ?

P.S. All I want is one woman to love !

AAAAhhhh What a world, What a world.
My heart is melting, melting I tell you help me help me ! AAAAAAAHHHHHH !!!!!!!!

Jimmy

no photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:12 PM
Jimmy needs some Rico Suave!!! devil

Ya next time you are getting ready to go out......dl that song......Rico suave!!! As youre slapping on the aqua velva.....shake dem hips!!! Ya thats right!!! Feeeeeeeeeeel da rythym mon!!!

:banana: drinker devil

iwearthemask's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:15 PM
there is no language, you just have to be like me and MASSIVELY lower your standards! im just kidding, i have no clue myself...

no photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:22 PM
Just be yourself and don't try too hard. As they say, the best things are worth the wait.

Smiling_Irish's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:32 PM
:smile: Sorry you seem so frustrated. It takes time to get to know people. The guys who have flirted with me in the last year since I joined Christian Mingle were not really emotionally available. It makes me wonder why they act as though they want to meet someone but then never follow through or wait so long that I lose interest by the time they make up their mind; basically my complaint is there is no follow up. It is as though they want me to chase them and that is not going to happen. So if they do not actively pursue me I just let it go. Don't want to set the wrong precedent.
One thing that makes a difference in how attractive we are is whether or not we look healthy. Obesity is a good sign of a heart attack waiting to happen. Noone wants to fall in love, get married and become a widow or widower within a few years so if you want to meet someone special who looks appealing and healthy to you, you need to look appealing also. Does that help?? Blessin's to ya, Irish

no photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:32 PM
Edited by MindyMindy on Tue 11/18/08 11:34 PM

Competition. If you are only contacting the most beautiful women than you have a lot of competition.

Some of the not so pretty women are more beautiful than you think. I was never considered beautiful by people (cute, they always call me cute) but when guys get to know me they start seeing me different and I become more beautiful. Same with some of my girlfriends.

Try contacting some of the less beautiful girls and see what happens. They might be a lot more beautiful than you ever imagined.


By beautiful I assumed you meant how they looked. If you meant something else then ignore this post.

Good Luck and keep trying.



keepthehope's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:40 PM
Edited by keepthehope on Tue 11/18/08 11:41 PM
Maybe you are trying to hard. Maybe don't worry about their looks and start listening to them, find out what they are like, let them get to know you. Quantity does not mean Quality!

ChristmasSapphire's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:46 PM
LOL I'm going to play teacher and "grade" your profile a little. I hope you don't mind--I'm just trying to help!

Even though you say you're "happy and comfortable" with yourself, your profile makes me think you may be a little insecure. Women like CONFIDENCE!!! (Not in an arrogant a**hole kinda way, but in a "can-look-in-the-mirror-without-cringing" kinda way, if that makes any sense.) Your first paragraph--while somewhat funny--combined with the sentence about your body being a "work in progress" makes it feel like you look at things a little negatively. And since you mention your body flaws twice, it sounds like you're not happy with your body. A woman will take you at your word at this stage--if you're not happy with your body, she will assume she won't be happy either.

I would also edit your fishing paragraph slightly--it sounds like you're looking for approval, like a child. (" can bait my own hook an everything!")

Well that's my take on it. I hope I helped! But then again, I'm here looking, too, aren't I?ohwell

Jimmy59's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:47 PM
Thank you:
Yes it does help a lot. I see that you are finding the same kind of response as myself from the men as the women.
I realize that all good thing take time.

I'm in hopes that my photos are giving the impression that I'm Domed. Although if hat is at you are seeing then I had better take a look at improving my photos. You know I thought that my photos were a big part of the pitcher(No pun intended.)

keepthehope's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:48 PM

LOL I'm going to play teacher and "grade" your profile a little. I hope you don't mind--I'm just trying to help!

Even though you say you're "happy and comfortable" with yourself, your profile makes me think you may be a little insecure. Women like CONFIDENCE!!! (Not in an arrogant a**hole kinda way, but in a "can-look-in-the-mirror-without-cringing" kinda way, if that makes any sense.) Your first paragraph--while somewhat funny--combined with the sentence about your body being a "work in progress" makes it feel like you look at things a little negatively. And since you mention your body flaws twice, it sounds like you're not happy with your body. A woman will take you at your word at this stage--if you're not happy with your body, she will assume she won't be happy either.

I would also edit your fishing paragraph slightly--it sounds like you're looking for approval, like a child. (" can bait my own hook an everything!")

Well that's my take on it. I hope I helped! But then again, I'm here looking, too, aren't I?ohwell


Maybe I need you to critique my profile like that Teach!!

Wrenches's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:50 PM
you could go to california to see the pah mela

no photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:54 PM

Thank you:
Yes it does help a lot. I see that you are finding the same kind of response as myself from the men as the women.
I realize that all good thing take time.

I'm in hopes that my photos are giving the impression that I'm Domed. Although if hat is at you are seeing then I had better take a look at improving my photos. You know I thought that my photos were a big part of the pitcher(No pun intended.)
We cant see your personality in a profile!!! Join our forums!!!bigsmile drinker

Jimmy59's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:55 PM
Thank you now what you said makes a lot of sence to me. I did not see through my self worth smoke. I have to say that this is the best dating sight that I have worked with in my 3 year endeavors.

Jimmy59's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:57 PM
Thank you for your responce.

Jimmy59's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:58 PM
Thanks for your responce.

Jimmy59's photo
Tue 11/18/08 11:59 PM
Thanks for your responce.

Jimmy59's photo
Wed 11/19/08 12:04 AM
Thanks for your responce. You were right on the 2nd part. Yes I look at there photos although I also conider there peronalty as the biggest part of the person. Can't love looks, Can't talk to looks, Can't share dreams with looks. So inside the women matters the most in my heart.

Jimmy59's photo
Wed 11/19/08 12:05 AM
Thanks for your responce.

JustAGuy2112's photo
Wed 11/19/08 12:23 AM


Competition. If you are only contacting the most beautiful women than you have a lot of competition.

Some of the not so pretty women are more beautiful than you think. I was never considered beautiful by people (cute, they always call me cute) but when guys get to know me they start seeing me different and I become more beautiful. Same with some of my girlfriends.

Try contacting some of the less beautiful girls and see what happens. They might be a lot more beautiful than you ever imagined.


By beautiful I assumed you meant how they looked. If you meant something else then ignore this post.

Good Luck and keep trying.





That's gotta be one of the most profound things I have seen you post so far.

Well said.

ChristmasSapphire's photo
Wed 11/19/08 12:31 PM


LOL I'm going to play teacher and "grade" your profile a little. I hope you don't mind--I'm just trying to help!

Even though you say you're "happy and comfortable" with yourself, your profile makes me think you may be a little insecure. Women like CONFIDENCE!!! (Not in an arrogant a**hole kinda way, but in a "can-look-in-the-mirror-without-cringing" kinda way, if that makes any sense.) Your first paragraph--while somewhat funny--combined with the sentence about your body being a "work in progress" makes it feel like you look at things a little negatively. And since you mention your body flaws twice, it sounds like you're not happy with your body. A woman will take you at your word at this stage--if you're not happy with your body, she will assume she won't be happy either.

I would also edit your fishing paragraph slightly--it sounds like you're looking for approval, like a child. (" can bait my own hook an everything!")

Well that's my take on it. I hope I helped! But then again, I'm here looking, too, aren't I?ohwell


Maybe I need you to critique my profile like that Teach!!



I'm happy to oblige!

I think you should tell more about yourself before you lay out what you're looking for. It's not that it's bad that you know what you're looking for, but I felt like I was being slammed with demands from someone I hadn't even met. Picture this--it's move-in day, and your new neighbor offers to carry a box in for you. I feel like you're setting one on top of the other in his arms weighing him down. I guess what I'm saying is you're asking more of him than he's willing to give at that point. His instinct may be to raise his hands in surrender and back away slowly.

I take it the divorce didn't go so well...? You sound really bitter about it. (Making a living, "such as it is"; not having time to work with your church; and wanting to get your kids "back...where they belong") It's rule #1 for the first "date"--don't bring the "ex"es into it. Your "special man" doesn't want his time with you to be spent stewing over the guy that came before him.

I can definitely understand feeling sorry for yourself sometimes after a divorce that apparently didn't go so well, but you need make sure you're not presenting yourself as someone in need of a pity party. I would completely omit "I don't cook much anymore, because it is not worth cooking for one" and "I have found that I really hate being alone, and would even prefer staying at work, rather that go home to be by myself." While I can empathize with both of those statements, it feels like a lot of weight that your special man would have to lift off your shoulders in order to make you happy, and since he doesn't yet know how special you are, he might decide that it's not worth the effort.

Overall, with the bitterness and sadness, your profile presents as though you are not ready to end the chapter with your ex and start over. "One of these days I will finally get my feet back under me" makes it sound like you're not ready to begin a new relationship. It sounds like you've been hurt extremely, and haven't really begun to heal. My advice would be to find a more positive light to shine on yourself and your situation. You need to show your special man how special you truly are, and make him want to be worthy of you.

I hope something I've said helps!!!

As they say, "those who can, do. those who can't..."

~Teach

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