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| Topic: Singles who do not want children. | |
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What's your thoughts? My cousin is 48yrs old and she's never wanted children. I use to think she was "odd" but now that I'm older I respect her choice.
Raising children isn't easy and if you're not ready or just don't want the responsibility you shouldn't have them? |
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its much easier to just take care of ourselves,,,
I completely understand the choice, and I also respect those who recognize the disinterest before making babies,,,lol |
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<-------- no children (by choice)
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I have to wonder why those who are questioning people who don't want children always mention that raising children isn't easy. Do you think people are unaware of that and think it's easy? Or that people who don't want children are looking for an easy out?
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Parenting is a full time job. No time off no sick days. I think its a big decision to me a parent, and if someone doesn't want to take that step I respect his/her decision. I also have a cousin who doesn't want kids. She is really a second mother to my child.
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i don't really think its odd. i have only dated one person in my life that has had a child. i helped raise him for nine years and loved every minute of it however, i never felt the need to have one of my own.
ps. 6 years after her and i split up, i still see him regularly. love that kid! |
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I admit when I was young, it was crammed in my head that the next step to adulthood is having children.
Age and experience with my own children has straightened this wrongful thinking! Lol and allowed me to not cram this way of thinking in my kids heads. |
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Edited by
realcarebear
on
Sun 03/30/14 06:05 PM
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I grew up thinking that getting married and having kids was what life was all about. That's what everyone was suppose to do. Lol. My friend told me once she wanted to travel and do something other than settle down and have a family. She loves kids! She's happy in life and she travels and does so many good things for others. It would be impossible for her to live the way she does with children of her own. Okay I lost my thought and where I was going with that...
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I admit when I was young, it was crammed in my head that the next step to adulthood is having children. Age and experience with my own children has straightened this wrongful thinking! Lol and allowed me to not cram this way of thinking in my kids heads. i didnt want any till 30....had him 10 years early |
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I'm a preschool teacher, so I have 20 children in my room for 40 hours a week, 5 days a week. So, I see them all as my own children. I don't want to go through the pain of childbirth or have children with someone and they leave me shortly afterwards. This is why I'm undecided about children.
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I admit when I was young, it was crammed in my head that the next step to adulthood is having children. Age and experience with my own children has straightened this wrongful thinking! Lol and allowed me to not cram this way of thinking in my kids heads. i didnt want any till 30....had him 10 years early i had my daughter when i was 19 and i had my son 4yrs later ( i was 23) i actually had abortion when i was 16 which i still regret doing but at the time it seem to had been right i gor pg 2months before i got pg with my daughter and i had a miscarrage and i had a miscarrage 6months before i got pg with my son the miscarrage i had before i got pg with my daughter i had a severe bladder and yeast infection the miscarrage that i had before i got pg with my son i lost it the day aftr i found out i was pg not sure what the problem was im thinking sense i have a birthdefect called lawerence beild moon syndrome it effects each person in a differnt way but with a female they request for you not to get pg well geeze i didnt even know i had this birthdefect untill 8yrs ago so most likey the reason i lost the 2 would had been related to this birthdefect |
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.. my youngest sister.. is in a very healthy relationship... but they have no children... I envy them sometimes.. the freedom to travel.. their house is always tidy .. nothing broken... no crayons on the walls are holes in the walls....lol... extra money in the bank.... no need to be quiet while love making... but she's admitted to me.. that she wishes she could have had children... and I wish that for her as well... she would be truly a great mother... but she is comfortable with their decision not to have children... I am sure it crosses her mind from time to time... but she is truly content.. Not leaving a legacy behind her.... a living legacy that is... she will leave her mark is some other form.....phD..
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i want to be a dad but i keep finding women that can no longer have children
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I have to wonder why those who are questioning people who don't want children always mention that raising children isn't easy. Do you think people are unaware of that and think it's easy? Or that people who don't want children are looking for an easy out? lol I think it's a good question because I do not think that raising children is hard. It was a joy and it still is. I also respect the choices of those who do not want kids. mine are grown but I still keep in touch with them and love to spend time with them. I can't imagine my life without them. They gave my life meaning and continue to do so. I don;t think tidiness is impossible with children in the home. mine did housework and cooking...etc...and had plenty of places to color so that our walls were seldom if ever crayoned...I provided a lot of structure, but I think it served them well in the long run even if I seemed bossy to some of the other mothers in my social circle at the time |
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There are a lot of people out there who still think we should have children by a certain age. I've been asked several times why I'm 35 with no kids, as if it means there's something wrong.
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I admit when I was young, it was crammed in my head that the next step to adulthood is having children. Age and experience with my own children has straightened this wrongful thinking! Lol and allowed me to not cram this way of thinking in my kids heads. i didnt want any till 30....had him 10 years early i had my daughter when i was 19 and i had my son 4yrs later ( i was 23) i actually had abortion when i was 16 which i still regret doing but at the time it seem to had been right i gor pg 2months before i got pg with my daughter and i had a miscarrage and i had a miscarrage 6months before i got pg with my son the miscarrage i had before i got pg with my daughter i had a severe bladder and yeast infection the miscarrage that i had before i got pg with my son i lost it the day aftr i found out i was pg not sure what the problem was im thinking sense i have a birthdefect called lawerence beild moon syndrome it effects each person in a differnt way but with a female they request for you not to get pg well geeze i didnt even know i had this birthdefect untill 8yrs ago so most likey the reason i lost the 2 would had been related to this birthdefect im sorry to hear. the good thing is you defied the odds and had two beautiful kids |
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Why have children if you do not want to be a parent? We have enough unwanted children in this world. I have friends that like to travel and enjoy their lives without kids. As for me, I wanted to be a mom. I grew up in a big family and like having a family. I debate if I would personally have more, but I am open to having a blended family.
Life still exists without having kids. I think it is awesome when people that know they do not want kids, don't have kids. |
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There are a lot of people out there who still think we should have children by a certain age. I've been asked several times why I'm 35 with no kids, as if it means there's something wrong. my sister has always been very career oriented. So, she was 40 when she had her first and 42 (I think) when she had her 2nd. I am sure she fielded some comments, but her husband is a Dr. so I think she had plenty of good advice. Anyway both children are happy and healthy and very bright. some one who asks why you are 35 with no kids is being rude. |
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Yeah exactly. Just because others did, doesn't mean you should. I think I was mainly thinking how impractical it would have been, to bring a child up in a poor income household, and I decided it wouldn't be fair on a child. It isn't easy to find a job, or buy a place of your own, these days, so I just thought "It can't be done". The amount of money I get paid weekly, is only just enough to feed one person, and pay the bills, and I never have much left over, after I pay my bills. I couldn't watch a child struggle or starve.
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Very ironic for me though, because I'm always making children laugh or smile. Like when I babysit for family members. I get along with children so well, but the amount of money I recieve, will never be enough to bring up a family on. I just ignore people who ask why I have no children, because it would be so plain jane, being like everyone else. I never care if ? more popular than whatever. I had my mind made up. And that's that.
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