MY VERY OWN SPIDER
Right above my computer about two meters up sits a big spider, six cm plus measured from toe to toe, as if supported by air. Of course not by air, he has his web and I have mine. I often speak with him, look up at him feeling the mutual connection. I know it’s a him and we’re friends. Why do I know it’s a him is because I saw his woman a few weeks back and then she disappeared somewhere where women disappear to. Today in the middle of working on the manuscript for my book The Model I noticed something swinging gently in front of my eyes; a small spider less than a centi from the little toe to the one at the other side! Moving my head I caught the glimmer of the thin silken thread that held her suspended. I saw a youth exploring the world, or a ‘youthes’, like my own daughter. I wiggled my fingers on the keyboard and the young explorer climbed up swiftly taking her thread with her, stopping at times to have a curious look down at me and then continuing up. Still wiggling my fingers my eyes followed her. She sat up there for a while wondering at the world and then she probably went to her Mum cause I didn’t see her next time I looked up, only her Dad. A week later, that’s today, I again sat by my computer and began to write. Suddenly, there she was again in front of my eyes questioning, ‘how’s things’? I tried to tell her about the difference of being a spider and being a human from a human point of view. She was hanging on her silken thread two meters plus long, with her father watching from above for quite a while, both listening and then she began to slowly climb, if that’s what spiders do. My friend the spider had not spun his web down by my things, even the little one didn’t leave any material trace of her visits; it was clear, we could visit each other but the domains remained separate. No way would I spin my web where they lived, see, we were the best of friends and we share the world, there is space for everyone.
Can someone miss a spider? I can because I do. For months our friendship blossomed; when I came home I looked up at him and smiled, said a few words in greeting often enquiring how the day had been so far. I imagined that he smiled back. As a rule he didn’t move just held his masculine stance portraying his control over his domain and at times I worried about his health as his meager food intake… but then a fly deviated from his regular path and… yes you guessed right. But I didn't guess what was to follow as I saw the fly hit the web perhaps some twenty centi from my friend and then the unbelievable happened; I saw him in two places at once! Truly. The proud masculine shape still stood guard at its usual place whilst his alter ego, the hunter, simultaneously crouched over its prey in another. It must have been a trick he purposefully played on me or then just an optical illusion, I prefer the former.
Last night as the cat lay purring on my stomach I couldn’t fall asleep, not because of my cat but because I missed my friend the spider, done so many nights. When I came home that fatal day a week ago I looked up as usual and my smile of anticipation turned into one filled of fear, shock and then to deep sadness as the truth sank in. It really hurt. His legs had curled up around him into a fetal position except for one that lay stretched out as if defying death to the end. Should I take him down or leave him so I could remember… yes… no…? Then he made the decision for me and fell down next to the computer. The beautiful bougainvillea bushes climb up and shade the balcony where I sleep and there I placed him, amongst the colorful flowers in a world we both share with so many others.
The above story is true and it leaves me with a feeling of guilt and questions, like; Can one have a spider as a friend?

I’ve experienced the usual connections with the four legged kind, the cat, dog, goat and the horse, all rewarding for everyone. By the way the goat is superior to the others. I once had a summer-long relationship with a two legged loon, a bird with a very distinct call. She always kept out of my sight whilst she obviously kept an eye on me. When I went hiking in thr woods I could hear her call as she followed me at a distance hidden amongst the trees. Was she teasing me? Returning after having been away a few days her greetings were especially volumous.
The relationship was uplifting, rewarding and humbling. The following summer coming back to the same place I was met by her enthusiastic trills followed by a few of her own well-chosen words of greetings. And I didn’t see her, not once.
But perhaps the most unusual connection to things living, six legged this time, was when I befriended some pioneering bees. These, a bunch of carpenter bees, were about to settle in an old fallen tree trunk in our garden, roots and stuff you know, quite inspiring. I had placed it there for decorative purposes and as a bench. I followed with interest as they were busy drilling their holes and how couple after couple moved in to their newly built homes and then in time I saw more fly out than had moved in. Life was taking place. Later there could be a hundred of them happily playing in a merry dance around their apartments. I could walk through the ‘cloud’, stop, look at one of them straight in the eye so to speak, smile, connecting. But come someone else than me, oich! I could hear the song of their wings change; aggression! Be warned; stay away, private domain! It was the males that made the noise but then if it became sting-time it was the mother of the household that took over how typical). I had heard that one can have bees as friends, bees that actually recognize you, like apart from others… but a spider as a friend? Please tell me… what exactly I don’t know but just do.
PS. If you’re the reading and writing kind, contact and let’s boost each other. Got many manuscripts needing love.

Topic: Can one have a spider as a friend?

As a friend? Billy has one for a son.

Why not?
I bet some spiders make better friends than humans.

i have a tarantula for a pet so i dont see why not

Yes.
I also recommend unicorns.

The fly didn't think so...but he caved and paid the ultimate price

RebelArcher, you made my day. That was very funny and clever. Had me laughing which is what a good forum should do. Thank-you.

Lots of critters (including humans) develop mutually beneficial relationships. Whether that constitutes being what most of us think of as a friend or not, is often a matter of imagination.

Sociopath humans often behave as though they are your friend, and from your end of things, they will seem to care deeply about you.

When it comes to pretty much all non-humans (and some humans too), since we can't actually directly understand their language/means of communication, we can only guess how they feel about us.

Aww, you're welcome