Topic: The Monkey in the Bar
uk1971
Joined Tue 04/10/07 Posts: 20607 |
A guy goes into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder, and sits down at the bar.
The bartender says, “What’ll you have?” The guy says, “I’ll have a beer, the monkey will have a shot.” The bartender sets them up, the monkey jumps down and downs the shot. He looks up and down the bar, sees a lady with a cigarette in an ash tray. He runs down and pisses on the cigarette and puts it out. The bartender says, “Hey, you are going to have to watch that monkey, I can’t have him bothering my customers.” The guy says, “I’m sorry, I’ll pay for anything he breaks.” Just then the monkey jumps over on the pool table, grabs the que-ball and swallows it whole. The bartender says, “Now that’s going to cost you. He just swallowed my que-ball.” The guy throws down a twenty, grabs up the monkey and leaves. A couple of weeks later here comes the guy with the monkey. The bartender says, “We’re not going to have any trouble with that monkey are we?” The guy says, “No, he has really calmed down.” The bartender sets up a beer and a shot. The monkey jumps down, downs the shot looks up and down the bar. He spies a lady with a drink with a cherry in it. He runs down, grabs the cherry, bends over and sticks it up his butt, pulls it out and eats it. The bartender says, “Did you see that? That’s disgusting, he just stuck that cherry up his butt, pulled it out and ate it.” The guy says, “Yeah, ever since that cueball incident, he tries everything on for size.”  
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allanbigdaddy21
Joined Sun 10/04/09 Posts: 1 |
Nice well use this one for sure thanks send me more
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Jtevans
Joined Fri 08/10/07 Posts: 22987 |
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MirrorMirror
Joined Fri 10/26/07 Posts: 87837 |
QUOTE: A guy goes into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder, and sits down at the bar. The bartender says, “What’ll you have?” The guy says, “I’ll have a beer, the monkey will have a shot.” The bartender sets them up, the monkey jumps down and downs the shot. He looks up and down the bar, sees a lady with a cigarette in an ash tray. He runs down and pisses on the cigarette and puts it out. The bartender says, “Hey, you are going to have to watch that monkey, I can’t have him bothering my customers.” The guy says, “I’m sorry, I’ll pay for anything he breaks.” Just then the monkey jumps over on the pool table, grabs the que-ball and swallows it whole. The bartender says, “Now that’s going to cost you. He just swallowed my que-ball.” The guy throws down a twenty, grabs up the monkey and leaves. A couple of weeks later here comes the guy with the monkey. The bartender says, “We’re not going to have any trouble with that monkey are we?” The guy says, “No, he has really calmed down.” The bartender sets up a beer and a shot. The monkey jumps down, downs the shot looks up and down the bar. He spies a lady with a drink with a cherry in it. He runs down, grabs the cherry, bends over and sticks it up his butt, pulls it out and eats it. The bartender says, “Did you see that? That’s disgusting, he just stuck that cherry up his butt, pulled it out and ate it.” The guy says, “Yeah, ever since that cueball incident, he tries everything on for size.”
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