Go placidly amid the noise and waste, and remember what
comfort there may be in taking out a subprime mortagage to own a piece thereof.
Avoid loudand aggressive persons, unless you are in need of a personal
injury attorney or campaign spokesperson. Rotate your tires.
As far as possible without surrender, brown nose those greater
than yourself and above you on the corporate ladder; heed well
their advice, even though they be turkeys. Know what to kiss,
and when.

Consider that two wrongs never make a right, but that three lefts
do. Wherever possible, put people on hold. Be comforted that
in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, and despite
the changing fortunes of time, there is always a big future
in computer maintenance. Know yourself; if you need help with
that, call the government Exercise caution in your daily affairs, especially
with the credit card companies. Be assured that a walk
through the ocean of most souls will scarcely get your feet
wet. Therefore, fall not into love; for a good time, call
555-4311. Ask for Ken. Gracefully surrender the things of
youth; birds, clean air, good hair days, honest politicians. Hire people
with looks. And reflect that whatever misfortune may be your
lot, it could only be worse in Milwaukee.

You are a fluke of the universe. It's an accident that you're
here at all. And whether you can hear it or not, the universe is
yawning behind your back.

Therefore, make peace with your god, whatever you conceive
him to be -- hairy thunderer or cosmic muffin. With all its
hopes, dreams, promises, and urban renewal, the world
continues to deteriorate.

Give up.