OK, I give up. I've finally come to the sad conclusion that I'm never gonna find the "Love Of My Life" here so I am now undergoing an extreme make-over. (no, not a toupee and face lift) I have decided to abandon any thoughts of entering into a LTR with "the girl of my dreams" the attractive, petite, woman 5 -10 years younger than myself who is also dreaming of being in love again and living happily ever after. I have become totally desperate and will date anyone between the ages of 18 and 125. Hopefully you are filthy rich and we can live in paradise somewhere sucking down exotic drinks under a palm tree. However, poor and sleazy is ok if you're willing to work or at least file for welfare & food stamps.

My good points; You're a smart woman so you probably wouldn't believe me anyway, I won't waste my breath trying to CON-vince you.
My bad habits; Yeah good try, you didn't really think I was gonna tell you did ya. Remember I'm a MAN so I lack any communication skills and clam up whenever you want to talk about stuff... If we "hook up" I'm sure you'll hear plenty, it’s all lies and I deny everything though. Can we talk about something else now ?

Things I like to do are; sit on the couch and either watch NASCAR or do nothing at all, naps are always nice. People watching is always amusing, especially when it's the drunks at the local bar slobbering all over you. My favorite is our monthly trip to the strip club (no, not the one where you do/did work). O yeah, did I mention that I don't have a job (or intend on getting one) or a place to live so you'll have to take care of those minor details as well.

If we're just hanging around the house any slobby attire will do, however when we dress up fancy and head to the corner bar you must look good in stilettos wearing a "short black dress" or "Daisy Dukes" with your butt cheeks hanging out. If you have at least your front teeth, that would be a bonus, however not necessary. You MUST be able to cook (while naked, forget the barefoot), clean house, fetch cold beer and the remote at the same time and give good foot rubs. If you have any kids forget it, mine are all in jail and I ain't raising yours. If you have a car (or even a license) that would be great, if not, don't sweat it, it's a short walk to the corner store and you can push the stuff home in a cart.

If you got this far either you're interested, didn't believe a word or are to stoned to know the difference, either way send me a note and I'll gladly add you to my little black book. Photo's are a must and remember now ladies, I am a man so I'm very visual and it's what’s on the outside that counts... Hot chicks to the top of the list and so forth... (Bribing or seducing me will get you to the top faster as well)


:)