If you’re frustrated with your love life like I am, this letter is for you. Some people find it easy to meet their partners. They go to the bar, meet up with strangers, have a few talks, and then walk hands in hands days after. I wondered how simple finding love is for those. I asked myself if I will ever find my love as easy as them.
There was a time I was crazy to look for someone on dating sites but it seemed impossible for me to meet the right person. Searching for a date online is totally different from doing so in real life. Everything was blurry until you meet them in person and turned out it didn’t work out as you expected. It happened to me so many times that I started to doubt myself.
Furthermore, I’ve always been the single girl in my group of friends. My life is going pretty well and maybe that’s enough, maybe I don’t need to be happily coupled as well. Whenever I say things like this to my close friends, they just shrug their shoulders and laugh “It’s just not the right time yet”.
Let me tell you something about hope. It’s easier for anyone to hold hope for others. I’m confident that my best friend who is job-hunting will find a great place for her career path, ready at any moment to hear of a new boyfriend, engagement, promotion, and new houses. Why is it so hard for me to believe that the very best things will happen to me?
So lately I have loosened myself up a little bit. I’m letting my co-workers believe that love is all around, letting my friends look forward to the day they will be my bridesmaids on the happiest day of my life, letting my family know for certain that there will be a guy that loves all my quirky and childish side. Just this time, my loved ones are the ones holding the hope for me.
The more you hope, the more you feel disappointed if things don’t happen the way you wanted it to be. So loosen it up a little bit. It doesn’t mean you have to give up all hope, you just need to pass it to someone around you or even me. I’ll hold some hope for you. And if you’re comforted by statistics: the numbers show that most of us will eventually find partners, even if we have to wait a while.
There is no way of knowing where love is going to strike, and when. It possibly happens in your least expected moment. Remind yourself how strong and how brave you are. You deserve love and to be loved. You are just someone’s type and you definitely are the answers to somebody’s prayers, the one he/ she has been waiting for. I just know it.
Waiting is hard and it is even harder if you keep carrying on the weight of hope. Pass it along to your friends and your family. Maybe you’ll find that you’re better off without it. Maybe without the worry, you’ll be able to see your soulmate more clearly when his/ her path intersects with yours.
Don’t forget to love yourself too – go to your favorite restaurant, order the finest dish, put on your beautiful dress, turn on some music and dance your night away till you fall asleep like a kid. Set up an example of how you want to be treated because your future partner might love you to the moon and back but they never know you as well as you know yourself. So be kind to yourself first.
“You’ll find love when you aren’t looking for it.” – sounds like a ridiculous statement. Even on my most independent and fulfilled moments in life, I can’t trick myself into thinking that I don’t want a partner. I still find my eyes turn when I see a new guy. It’s crystal clear that I can’t turn off that part of myself that wants to fall in love. Maybe you can’t either, so don’t. When love comes, it comes. Love will come in the most surprising way even when you left the door open. For my part, mine has a tiny note on the screen “Let yourself in. I’m ready, wrapped in hope.”, hope you are ready too!