Think online flirting is for geeks and creepers? Think again! Without showing a bit of interest in singles you dig, you wonâ€™t get anywhere with online dating. Flirting is how everyone jumps into the game. While initial contact generally still falls to the male side of the court, the way a woman replies can continue or kill the relationship in a hurry. By knowing the doâ€™s and donâ€™ts of flirting online, you can have fun and enjoy the process of flirting with interested singles in your area.
- Use emoticons. Donâ€™t overdo the emoticons, but it pays to toss out a few carefully chosen ones to show a bit of feeling (particularly if youâ€™re flirting with women). Start out with a smile or a wink and move up from there.
- Tease a bit. If you want to show some interest, and find out how they respond to a bit of lighthearted teasing, try the waters a bit. Too sensitive? Too tough and heartless? Itâ€™s a fine line, but youâ€™ll know when youâ€™ve crossed it.
- Start off well. The first words you type in can either help you or hurt you. â€œHey girlâ€ or â€œhi thereâ€ seem to be less threatening than tossing out crude jokes or anything that can be taken as a desperate call for a quick hook-up.
- Start a conversation. Ask a question about the personâ€™s photo (do you kayak often then? Or, how many cats are in that picture with you?) Find something to say other than commenting on the personâ€™s appearance.
- Ask questions.Â AskÂ about movies, music, pop culture, or anything else that you think he or she isÂ interested in. Bonus points to you if you remember what he/she answers another time you’re chatting.
- Donâ€™t feel compelled to answer immediately. If someoneâ€™s flirting with you online, it doesnâ€™t always require an instant response (particularly if youâ€™re on a real-live date!). Give some space and show you have a life.
- Find a common interest and get him/her talking. Be a good listener. Donâ€™t dominate the conversation.
- Be playful and show a sense of humor. Dating is not all about gothic romance and manic vampire novels, so donâ€™t be afraid to be a little funny.
- Make it quick sometimes. Donâ€™t drag out a long chat and make it all awkward. Be the one whoâ€™s mysterious and busy and youâ€™ll be more in demand. If youâ€™re always available until they sign off, you show signs of being desperate and lonely.
- Pass on funny videos or articles youâ€™ve read lately. You spend time online, so show that youâ€™re doing something interesting or smart while youâ€™re here.
Remember that with online dating, people are going to fall for the way they feel when theyâ€™re around you and the way they feel when they’re chatting with you online. So make sure youâ€™re a positive influence, you’re true and genuine to your real self, and that you arenâ€™t always whining about something.
Ready to jump into the world of online dating? Meet attractive singles in your area with the free Mingle2 app today.
ToÂ long-time singletons who are trying really hard not to be single anymore and who are using online dating websites to help match them up with a possible romantic candidate: youâ€™re spoiled for choice, and that could mean youâ€™re tossing away a chance at true love.
We live in a culture that demands quick results. We also live in a culture of multiple options. The two togetherâ€”sifting through multiple options while still expecting quick results once you make your choiceâ€”can be a recipe for dating disaster even if it works for buying a car or choosing a restaurant.
The fact is, developing a relationship takes time. Sometimes, it even takes a bit of a leap of faith. While youâ€™ll hear statistics telling you that youâ€™ll know within a minute or two of meeting a person whether or not youâ€™re physically attracted to him or her, those statistics do not take into account the friendship or even future romance that could develop if you stick around.
If youâ€™ve been reluctantly single for a long time, how are you approaching your dating life? Making a few changes could help you finally meet your match and find relationship bliss. Ask yourself the following questions to determine if you might be throwing away a possible match made in heaven.
Have you made room in your life for dating?
Your high-powered career, demanding job, hobbies, love of video games, or even your porn watching habits could be getting in the way of dating time. If you arenâ€™t carving out sufficient time to peruse possible online candidates, start a conversation, and meet in person for dates, how do you expect to find The One? And if you donâ€™t make time now, how could you possibly expect a significant other to stick around if you continue to make other things a priority in your life? If dating is a priority, treat it as such and donâ€™t let other things steal time from this pursuit.
Are you being too picky?
Itâ€™s great to have high standards and know what you want, but if you arenâ€™t meeting anyone because no one checks off all the boxes on your long list of must-haves, you could be sabotaging yourself. No one person is going to be absolutely perfect, including you. Consider relaxing your standards a bit about who you get to know. If someone seems very likely and checks off many of the boxes on your list (but not all), give it a shot anyway. Choose only one or two absolute must-haves and make the rest optional.
Are you allowing a relationship time to develop?
So you know within 30 seconds that this girl doesnâ€™t weaken your knees or that guy isnâ€™t the Romeo youâ€™d dreamed of. If your date is likable, has a lot in common with you, or is even just fun to be around, consider giving the relationship some time to develop. Friendships that donâ€™t turn into romance are also fulfilling, and an advantage to developing friendships means you expand your social circle (his best friendâ€™s cousin might be your true love!). In other cases, just getting to know someone you didnâ€™t immediately see as romance material could be the ticket to finding lasting happiness with someone. Donâ€™t throw away a first date too quickly.
Are you working to improve your own personality and character?
The American attitude of â€œthe customer is always rightâ€ does not apply to dating. You canâ€™t be a pushover or a jerk or a tightwad or completely self-centered and then expect other singles to throw themselves at you in droves. Put some time into being the kind of person youâ€™d like to date. Spend time to look physically attractive, but also work to make your insides beautiful and irresistible, whether itâ€™s developing patience, reading up on current events, practicing your comedic one-liners, or learning to read music. Whatever it is in a future mate that you want to attract, be more of that.
Online dating offers a huge opportunity for meeting amazing people. Whether youâ€™re looking for romance or just want to have some fun, Mingle2 provides a great experience in online dating. Plus, itâ€™s 100% subscription free! Visit our Homepage right now to get started meeting hot singles in your area.
It happens to everyone at some point: the person who is serving you your drink or meal is so smoking hot that youâ€™re tempted to leave a $100 tip in hopes that you can get a number. When you are infatuated with someone in a serving profession such as a waiter/waitress or bartender, how can you get a date? Is that even possible? Here are a few things to consider as you plot your next move.
Theyâ€™re Paid to be Nice
Servers in the U.S. get paid less than other workers because they are expected to earn the tips that make up the difference. Working in a high-end bar or restaurant can yield some pretty hefty tips, too, so being nice to customers and even some flirting is called for in order to increase the amount of tips from satisfied customers. If youâ€™re not sure whether your server is really interested in you or is just being nice because of her job, watch how she interacts with other customers. If sheâ€™s equally nice and/or flirtatious with others, you might have to grab her attention in some other way.
They Get Hit on All the Time
If the bartender is drop-dead dreamy, he knows it. He gets hit on all the time by both men and women in varying stages of inebriation, so itâ€™s not likely that your own attempts to be suave and alluring will create much of a stir in his heart. Same goes with good-looking or charismatic female servers and bartenders, except that a woman might be even more jaded to clumsy attempts on the part of customers to get her number or ask her for a date.
So, What are Your Options?
There are two crucial things to plan for when you decide to make your move: timing and allowing him/her to accept an invitation that does not appear to be threatening. Timing. The when of asking out your future significant other is critical. If the only place you see her is during her shift, itâ€™s often best to drop by right before her shift ends rather than at the beginning or middle of her shift. The Non-Threatening Invitation. Precisely because he gets hit on so often, extend an invitation to an event that is not a date. Try handing him a flyer to a band performance (you donâ€™t have to be in the band), tell him about a big party going on, or (if youâ€™re lucky enough to know his hobbies or passions) clue him in on an upcoming event in which he has an interest (and at which you can also appear without looking out of place). A non-threatening invitation means that your server has an out if she isnâ€™t interested but doesnâ€™t also feel as if she has to reject your direct request for a one-on-one date (and no clear rejection means you can still go to her bar or restaurant without feeling totally awkward in the future). If she shows up to the event, you can â€œaccidentallyâ€ bump into her and strike up a conversation now that youâ€™re outside the context of her work. Now you can turn on the charm factor. Even if youâ€™ve got a crush on your server, keep your options open to other people. Desperation shows, so donâ€™t give up on meeting other singles and constantly expanding your dating horizons. Try Mingle2â€™s popular and 100% free online dating website today. Visit our Homepage to set up a profile and start meeting exciting singles in your area right now.
Are you a ladies man and a romance champion only in your head? Do you fantasize about making women swoon but fall short of the mark in real life? Have you ever felt absolutely clueless about what a woman finds romantic? Have you made an idiot of yourself at least once and feel like you just donâ€™t get how itâ€™s done?
Unless youâ€™re a full-blown narcissist, being romantic and making the right kinds of romantic gestures is important to you, even if you arenâ€™t sure how to smoothly go about it. Donâ€™t fret: learning to be romantic is a skill anyone with enough ambition can learn. With a little time, some good observational skills, and some sincere practice, youâ€™ll eventually get the hang of it and discover your unique romantic intelligence.
Women can be downright scary and confusing (even if they are sometimes unconscious of the fact), but most of them are still a sucker for a guy who treats them well and admires them for who they are. Whether youâ€™re just getting to know a woman or youâ€™re in a long-term relationship, romantic gestures are almost always appreciated. Just making the effort is something women consider romantic.
To help you along on your pathway to becoming a Don Juan, here are five tips to winning attention from women and becoming a natural ladies man. Adapt these romantic gestures to your personality and situation as needed.
5 Romantic Gestures for the Romantically Clueless Man
- Listen and Commiserate. Women sometimes like to vent about things that happen. The act of just saying it out loud and expressing appropriate disgust/awe/annoyance/anger/joy is usually enough to release tension. A beginning romantic gesture for you would be to listen carefully, respond when appropriate, and then DO NOT TRY TO OFFER A SOLUTION. Just accept that there is no solution, even if a solution is obvious. Unless she asks you specifically for a solution, just listen. And put the phone down!
- Surprise Her with a Small but Meaningful Gift. Has she expressed a liking for something in particular? Do you have some sort of inside joke? Have you seen something that reminds you of her? A small gift that has meaning is both non-threatening and romantic. Keep it simple and inexpensive, but take the time to wrap it for the final romantic touch.
- Offer to Participate in an Activity She Finds Interesting. It could be a sport, a hobby, or something excruciatingly boring like shopping, but trying it out with your honey (and doing so with an open mind and no complaints) will make her feel special.
- Be Encouraging. Women usually respond very well to sincere words of encouragement. You know sheâ€™s strong and can do anything she puts her mind to, so let her know. Look her in the eyes, smile, and tell her how wonderful she is. You can ramp up the romantic factor by giving specific examples of things you like about her or that you admire about her spirit. As long as you are sincere and not condescending, your words will be very welcome.
- Physical Displays of Affection. If your sweetie likes to hold your hand or cuddle, donâ€™t wait for her to initiate public or private physical displays of affection. Weâ€™re not talking sex here, either (which is a topic for another post). Reaching for her hand, putting your arm around her, hugging her from behind, and even a tender kiss or two in front of friends are all things many women find very romantic. Donâ€™t expect all such displays to lead to sex. Let the physical affection stand on its own most of the time so that she feels delight in the fact that you enjoy non-sexual touch, too.
Romance is a skill that is fun to practice and put into action. If you are looking for fun and possible romance, Mingle2 offers members the opportunity to meet compatible singles in your area. Itâ€™s simple and free to get started. Check out our Home page to begin building your profile and start meeting other singles today!
Youâ€™ve got style, youâ€™ve got flair, and youâ€™ve got a smile that can charm the stripes off a zebra. Your date is going to be so impressed, sheâ€™s likely to throw herself at you in the first five minutesâ€”that is, if youâ€™ve taken a few minutes to do a personal grooming check before heading out the door.Â When youâ€™ve selected just the right shirt, pants, and shoes, itâ€™s the little, personal attentions to your appearance that really make a difference.
It doesnâ€™t matter how good-looking and wonderful you are, if youâ€™ve got bad breath, you wonâ€™t make a good impression. The easy fix is to brush your teeth and/or use a bit of mouthwash before leaving your house. You can also pop a stick of mint gum into your mouth for a quick freshening. Chronic halitosis, on the other hand, will eventually overcome quick fixes, souring the air between you and your date very quickly. The most common cause of bad breath is bacteria growing in your mouth, so regular brushing and flossing are vitally important for long-term smell control. These vital hygiene and grooming actions remove food particles from your tongue, gums, and between your teeth that, if left to fester, will decay and stink it up. Other culprits that cause halitosis, such as dental infections, acid reflux, sinus infections, bronchitis, dry mouth, diabetes, and liver problems, might need a doctorâ€™s expertise to help cure.
The Beard, the Nose, and the Ears
Facial hair can be tricky, but whatever your beard or sideburns style, make sure that itâ€™s clean and neatly clipped. While a bit of five-o-clock shadow at the end of a long day can be sexy, the â€œI couldnâ€™t be bothered to shave for three daysâ€ look is usually sloppy and unattractive, and it will tell your date you donâ€™t care enough to make an effort. Interestingly, a recent studyÂ in AustraliaÂ indicatesÂ that women may rateÂ men with about 10 days worth of facial hair growth as theÂ most attractive. Make sure your facial (and head) hair all looks deliberate and cared for. The nose and the ears have a tendency to sprout long hairs as you ageâ€”whether you want them to or not. Nose and ear clippers are inexpensive and make the job quick and easy. Youâ€™ll certainly look younger without little tufts peeking out of your nostrils.
A Dab of Deodorant
In the olden days, men were tough and muscular and had a manly scent that made women swoon, according to historical romantic novels. These arenâ€™t the olden days, and deodorant is one of those technological advances for which civilization should bow down and be forever grateful. Be tough and muscular if you wish, but choose a deodorant that can handle your masculinity for the entire date. You probably donâ€™t have a problem trying to remember these vital personal grooming tips, but just like a pilot preparing to take a plane into the air, a checklist will help remind you of important things to do when you might be otherwise distracted by the choice of whether to bring flowers or not. (Bonus tip: a bouquet of posies is never amiss.)
When youâ€™re building an online dating profile, the photos you select have a big impact on your perceived desirability. We all know that posting a selfie you took in the bathroom is pretty creepy, but going too far in the other direction may also scare off potential dates. If you go overboard with a professionally lit studio portrait that looks like it was made for LinkedIn, you lose the chance to show your personality. So whatâ€™s a man to do? Turn to science, of course. Since online dating is so universally appealing, there have been thousands of research studies on all aspects of catching a date online. Here is a simple look at what research says is the best online dating profile photo.
Photo Tips for Men:
- Donâ€™t post a selfie. Selfie photos of men get 8% fewer messages than snapshots taken by someone else. Have a friend take a photo.
- Take photos outside. Studies show that women are 19% more likely to respond positively to a photo of a guy taken outside rather than inside. With women, itâ€™s the reverse (indoor photos are more preferred). So men, if you have 2 or 3 photos in your dating profile, make sure at least one of them is taken outside.
- Go solo. Having even one extra person in a photo dropped the number of messages a profile receives by 42%. The worst offender: large groups of friends drinking.
- Donâ€™t sweat the facial expressionâ€”be yourself. Smiling or not smiling is equally fine for menâ€™s online dating profiles. Studies show that women respond well to both. You can look a little flirty, but itâ€™s important that you donâ€™t look like youâ€™re flirting with someone just outside the camera shot. If youâ€™re going to look flirty, make sure youâ€™re flirting with the camera.
- Donâ€™t use the MySpace angle. While men respond well to photos of a woman in that coy camera shot (taking a selfie with the camera just above you at armâ€™s length), women donâ€™t rate photos of men as being as attractive in this angle. The MySpace angle has become a feminine thing, apparently.
- Skip the suit and tie. Studies show men can safely save this for a fancy night out, since women donâ€™t respond as often (or as positively) to a guy whoâ€™s in shirt and tie as to a guy in normal clothes (a simple shirt and jeans) or shirtless.
- Post at least one â€œaction shotâ€ in your profile. This doesnâ€™t have to be you jumping hurdles, but it should be a photo of you involved in some interesting activity (the key word here is activityâ€”sitting on the couch or working on the computer doesnâ€™t count). This kind of shot generates one of the highest percentages of conversations that turn into actual face-to-face meetings.
- If youâ€™re not going to show your face, be unique and cool. There are some really creative shots out there that donâ€™t show the face (like when youâ€™re scuba diving, or wearing a motorcycle helmet), and these shots get a lot of response as long as theyâ€™re unusual enough (or sexy enough) that they spark peopleâ€™s interest.
- Good backgrounds matter. Skip the cluttered bar or messy bedroom. Go for simple and non-distracting, as a general rule.
- Get a full-body photo in your profile. Having at least one full body photo in your online dating profile can increase messages by 200%.
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So how do you know if she’s flirting with you, and how can you tell if she’s just being nice? This is probably the oldest question in the world, and because it has never been definitively answered, it will continue to be a question for all men. The truth is women often communicate through signals other than plain speaking for a number of reasons, some of which could be that many women are trained to not be overly assertive in asking for what they want; they feel shy about stating romantic intentions openly and want you to get the hint and make the first move; or they enjoy the process of getting to know you along with the thrill of seeing how you respond to their flirtations. But how do you know if sheâ€™s into you or if she is just being friendly and polite? Sometimes the two can look very similar.
Thereâ€™s sometimes no definitive way to tell, so youâ€™ll need some good contextual clues to help you out. If you know her well and she suddenly starts acting differently around you, the following might be good flirting giveaways:
Blushing and Giggling
Nearly every time she sees you or talks to you, she starts blushing and/or giggling. Not all girls blush and giggle, but when the object of their affection is near, they might not be able to help doing it just a little bit. Does she flush a little pink as you chat? Does she seem eager to laugh at your jokes and keep the conversation light-hearted? These are good clues she is flirting with you.
Some people are more touchy-feely than others, so a quick hug from her or a hand on your arm could be natural behaviour for her and doesnâ€™t mean sheâ€™s dying with love for you. If she hasnâ€™t often touched you in the past, however, and now suddenly finds an excuse to playfully hit you or touch you casually, itâ€™s very likely sheâ€™s flirting with you.
When you donâ€™t know a girl well, figuring out if sheâ€™s flirting or just being nice is more difficult. Some girls are just kind people who pay attention when you speak and are interested in who you are even if they arenâ€™t thinking of you romantically. Here are some good clues to check for in situations where you have just met someone. The more of these clues that show up during a conversation, the more likely it is that sheâ€™s flirting.
People generally try to make eye contact with those they are interested in. If she refuses to look you in the eyes and seems disinterested in what you are saying, sheâ€™s probably not into you. If she makes frequent eye contact, however, and responds to what you are saying (often with a smile), she is probably flirting.
Leaning In to Talk to You
Leaning toward someone you like is part of open, inviting body language. Even if youâ€™re in a loud place and just struggling to hear each other, note how much she leans in toward you. Does she bring her face to within about six inches of yours? Does she allow her shoulder, arm, or hand to accidently touch you without immediately breaking contact? Does she lean in and make deliberate contact by touching your arm or back or your chest? If sheâ€™s just being nice, she will probably avoid physical contact. If sheâ€™s touching you frequently, sheâ€™s most likely flirting.
Touching Her Hair or Her Neck
If sheâ€™s swishing her hair around or touching and playing with it, she probably wants you to notice her and is flirting with you. If she playfully touches your hair, sheâ€™s definitely flirting. Same goes with her neck: if she briefly strokes her neck during your conversation, sheâ€™s romantically interested in you (this does not include scratching her neck). If she strokes your neck, sheâ€™s getting really close to you and is flirting.
Smiling and Laughing
A girl could smile and laugh at your jokes if sheâ€™s just being nice, but if sheâ€™s smiling and laughing a lot and you arenâ€™t a professional comedian, she is probably flirting. Watch to see if her smile reaches her eyes. The more her eyes smile along with her mouth, the more likely it is that sheâ€™s interested in you. Polite smiling and laughter can also reach the eyes, but it will be more subdued.
Asking for Your Number, Suggesting You Do Something Together, or Asking if You Want to Get Out of Here
All these are good indications that sheâ€™s flirtingâ€”especially the last one.
Girls can be complicated and difficult to understand, and when they donâ€™t plainly say the things they are thinking, it can be frustrating to try and figure out how they feel about you. Hopefully, these clues will help you pick up on subtle (or not so subtle) messages.
Try Mingle2 to set up a free profile and start meeting people who are interested in getting to know you.