OK.. so a while ago I met a new friend,that turned out to be more than just a friend.... he was my fix for a broken heart...
We've been together officially a little over a month now.

The problem is, before we started 'officially' seeing each other he told me that he'd most likely be moving to Virginia in February because of the fire academy in Virginia Beach. Since, he's made several trips from NJ to VA to train. About two weeks ago he took his written exam to get into the academy, a few days later he got his acceptance letter in the mail. So, we sat down together and he asked me what i wanted to do, and that he understood if i wanted to leave him to make it easier on the both of us when february came around and he would no longer be here. We both know that LDR's dont work most of the time and it probably wouldn't for us (lack of sex)

Honestly, i don't know what I should do.

Should I risk getting my heart broken worse than it would be now by staying with him and falling even more for him.. and then just have him leave in February?

Or Should i break it off now to save us both the severe heartache later on down the road?

What do you think?

so...no chance for you to move to?

New Jersey is my comfort zone, my friends, family, job, everything is here... Not to mention i'm not financially stable to move out of state just yet

ahhh...well you have a few options then...

#1 save and move
#2 LDR...
#3 break it off

which one out of your comfort zone are you most comfortable with??

If it were real love then there would be no question and you just answered it....

1- moving would mean leaving my friends and family, here. Not to mention, i'm paying bills upon bills, car payments for my new car, Full coverage on my car until i pay it off in full, cell phone, food, rent, ect. Plus we haven't really talked about moving in together and i dont know if it would be too soon.

2. LDR, i dont want to seem selfish but i KNOW that neither one of us would be able to go that long with out sex, or seeing each other for that matter. (If you could only see us in the bed room)

3- self explanitory... i mean i would be saving us both the heartache later on down the road, but it's going to be so hard, going almost everyday seeing each other... to just friends.. or friends with benefits

we haven't said "I love you" to each other yet... but it doesnt mean the feelings aren't there. I feel strongly for him and i know it's the same way for him... I accidentally passed out on our second date and had to go to the hospital, and because he's a volunteer firefighter he has the flashing blue lights in his car, which he turned on and followed that ambulance to the hospital... he sat the beside my hospital bed crying because he was so worried..

Youre too young to settle down!!! Have fun now while your young!!! There are a multitude of hearts to break!!!

true gypsy

i know i'm young and stupid

but you can't help to think 'what if?'

What if he is the one? And i just go and Screw it up...

Ugh i just dont know what to do right now.. should i stay or should i go?

If you loved him you would go.....right now your friends and family are more important. If its real love you would leave everything for him. You answered your own question. You are young but not stupid!!

so do i just break it off now? Or wait till february?

Thats up to you!!! Just make sure you use protection ALWAYS!!!

lol that i don't need advice on lol No glove no love...

But that was the whole purpose of this post... i know the whole situation is inevitable, i just don't know whether to wait, or just get it over with?

If i wait the, more feeling I'll have for him come February and the separation will hurt more, but if I end it right now, there's going to be that awkwardness from now until February knowing we should've been together, but aren't, I would like to think we could still be friends, but it would hurt a lot..

If he hs not said he loves you, you are having sex, but he is already suggesting it is ok with him if you break it off he is just trying to let you save face and pretend it is your idea. Your history and the faster you cut it off the better off you are going to be. Sorry it is a bummer but maybe Santa will bring you a better boyfriend. Sounds like this guy is a player. I would bet good money to donuts He knew a long time ago his New Year plans.

Making a decision is hard. You asking the "audience" thus giving you an out to taking any responsibility when it doesnt work out...

You are the only one to make that decision. I dont want to be the one to be blamed for the what ifs?

The very fact that you are actually questioning whether or not to break it off now would seem to indicate that you are more into the sex than you are into the feelings for him.

If your " feelings " don't override that negatives that you are able to name, then you are only kidding yourself. If the feelings were as deep as you say they are, then you would be busting your ass to try to find a way to be with him.

He's anything but a player, he's even a little bit of a dork. Especially since I made the first move... And before we even started dating he told me his plans to move to Virginia in February so it would've been my choice to even start the relationship or not... and I liked him a lot... February seemed so far away at the time, and... I kind of put it to the back of my mind until now

well, we are making assumptions, based on what ur typing here...

the only thing left to say to you on this topic is trust your gut!

peace

Ok don't get me wrong, i do like the sex... A LOT!... but it's more than just sex... right now i'm just figuring a way to make it less painful for the both of us.

I said before, that i do have strong feelings for him, but we've only been together a month now, I dont want to jump the gun and move too fast. Despite what feelings i have for him now, or what feeling he has for me i know that in reality those feelings might change later on down the road. People get married for years and then divorce because of a change of heart. So if i act on impulse now and go to virginia with him, what happens if it doesn't work?