Topic: Love or Family?
Givemyheart2U's photo
Wed 01/23/13 11:05 PM
Paper doesn't seem to work these days, so I guess that leaves me to the Mingle world to find a center; balance so to speak.

A little over 2 years ago, I left the wonderful state of AZ to be closer to my family and to get a new perspective on life I guess, but in this time I've been here, I feel like I have accomplished nothing! I had the privledge of watching my two younger siblings graduate from high school, watched my Mother struggle to keep her business and a man she calls her fiance that doesn't deserve her love. Last year, I said goodbye to my Grandfather, who passed away from Alzheimers disease and on Christmas Eve, I kissed my Great Grandmother for the last time.

I've let every good relationship I've had fail, because I feel my heart has never been in it completely. It's been back in AZ for the last two years, with my soul mate, the one person I fell incredibly in love with when I met him. But he is the one who let me go; we both agreed to go our separate ways, to still talk and be friends and help each other when times were tough. The only love I wanted and still believe in lives 1800 miles away.

I just can't seem to wrap my head around why the hell I am still here! So, should I choose love or family?

no photo
Wed 01/23/13 11:30 PM
Well it is a tough decision to make and it is difficult to choose between love and family........but life is short and i would suggest just follow your heart where it leads and you will find happiness

Goofball73's photo
Thu 01/24/13 07:49 AM
I look at it this way. Everybody has to make their own choices in life. I've made my share of great ones and bad ones. You learn from both, which is actually a cool thing.

It's awesome that you love your family, and you have been there for them. I love mine too, and have done a ton of sacrificing for them (and they for me as well). It's great having that support system, especially when you know they love you through thick and thin. In my mind, your family will always be there should you decide to move away from them.

It's risky loving someone who lives so far away. Most would also consider this to be a "pipe dream". They will tell you that you are wasting your time even thinking about someone who lives so far away. But, as I said at the beginning, you make your own choices. No matter which one you choose, just make sure you have thought it through, feel it is the best choice for you, and then do it. In your situation, you will probably have more people against you than for you (we do live in a cynical world).

In my opinion, you have done a lot for your family. You sound as if you are the "giving" type, and you will give your all to those you love. Which is awesome. However, sometimes ya gotta be a bit selfish. And perhaps this is one of those times. If this guy is the one you want, then why not go for it? You have one life. If that dude is the one for ya, then you might be cheating yourself out of happiness. Hope this helped.

Givemyheart2U's photo
Thu 01/24/13 12:59 PM
Thank you Goofball73! This helped clear the air about my perspective! flowerforyou

navygirl's photo
Thu 01/24/13 03:44 PM
Edited by navygirl on Thu 01/24/13 03:45 PM
To me; my family does come first and always will as there never will be a love in my life. As for you; I don't think you should have to chose between love and family. Sounds like a competition which is very unfair to you. You need to do what feels right to you. Life is too short to not go for what you want.