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| Topic: THE STUBBORN BLONDE | |
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A plane is on its way to Detroit when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves into an open seat in the first class section. The flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must sit in economy class because that's the type of ticket she paid for. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here." After repeated attempts and no success at convincing the woman to move, the flight attendant goes into the****it and informs the pilot and co-pilot that there's a blonde bimbo sitting in first class who refuses to go back to her proper seat. The co-pilot goes back to the woman and explains why she needs to move, but once again the woman replies by saying, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here." The co-pilot returns to the****it and suggests that perhaps they should have the arrival gate call the police and have the woman arrested when they land. The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the woman and whispers quietly in her ear, and she says, "Oh, I'm sorry," then quickly moves back to her seat in economy class. The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to get her to move back to economy without causing any fuss. "I told her first class isn't going to Detroit." |
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A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I have kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I have kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, Blonde." The Blonde then taped the note to the kid`s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Blonde." |
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A plane is on its way to Detroit when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves into an open seat in the first class section. The flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must sit in economy class because that's the type of ticket she paid for. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here." After repeated attempts and no success at convincing the woman to move, the flight attendant goes into the****it and informs the pilot and co-pilot that there's a blonde bimbo sitting in first class who refuses to go back to her proper seat. The co-pilot goes back to the woman and explains why she needs to move, but once again the woman replies by saying, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here." The co-pilot returns to the****it and suggests that perhaps they should have the arrival gate call the police and have the woman arrested when they land. The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the woman and whispers quietly in her ear, and she says, "Oh, I'm sorry," then quickly moves back to her seat in economy class. The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to get her to move back to economy without causing any fuss. "I told her first class isn't going to Detroit." So......as a blonde I must ask......did she make it to Detroit? LMAO! |
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A plane is on its way to Detroit when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves into an open seat in the first class section. The flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must sit in economy class because that's the type of ticket she paid for. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here." After repeated attempts and no success at convincing the woman to move, the flight attendant goes into the****it and informs the pilot and co-pilot that there's a blonde bimbo sitting in first class who refuses to go back to her proper seat. The co-pilot goes back to the woman and explains why she needs to move, but once again the woman replies by saying, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here." The co-pilot returns to the****it and suggests that perhaps they should have the arrival gate call the police and have the woman arrested when they land. The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the woman and whispers quietly in her ear, and she says, "Oh, I'm sorry," then quickly moves back to her seat in economy class. The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to get her to move back to economy without causing any fuss. "I told her first class isn't going to Detroit." So......as a blonde I must ask......did she make it to Detroit? LMAO! No she got off the plane.  
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I am taking a flight this week.....I may have to try out the line and see if it works for me. LOL!
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You go girl. It just maybe a new pick-up line.
 
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Milk Bath A blonde heard that milk baths would make her beautiful. So she left a note for her milkman to leave 15 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons so he knocked on her door to clarify the point. The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, "I found your note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did you mean 1.5 gallons?" The blonde said, "I want 15 gallons. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath." The milkman asked, "Do you want it Pasteurized?" The blonde said, "No, just up to my boobs, I can splash it in my eyes." |
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I grew up with my brother tormenting me with blonde jokes....I am surprised I haven't heard any of these. I am loving them though-I am enjoying the laughter for sure.
 
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Edited by
tazzops
on
Sun 01/27/13 11:28 AM
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These were sent to me from my lady friend in California. She is a blonde, she collects as many blonde jokes she can.
He Favorited was; A brunette and a blonde are walking along in a park. The brunette says suddenly, "Oh, look at that dead bird." The blonde stops, looks up, and says, "Where?" The other one is; Polish Priest A blonde was telling a priest a Polish joke, when halfway through the priest interrupts her, "Don't you know I'm Polish?" "Oh, I'm sorry," the blonde apologizes, "Do you want me to start over and talk slower?" |
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thts a gud jk lol
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These were sent to me from my lady friend in California. She is a blonde, she collects as many blonde jokes she can. He Favorited was; A brunette and a blonde are walking along in a park. The brunette says suddenly, "Oh, look at that dead bird." The blonde stops, looks up, and says, "Where?" The other one is; Polish Priest A blonde was telling a priest a Polish joke, when halfway through the priest interrupts her, "Don't you know I'm Polish?" "Oh, I'm sorry," the blonde apologizes, "Do you want me to start over and talk slower?" Hahaha I remember once I was working in the engineers office updating their specification files and a guy walked in ,saw me working and said to the others we're really in trouble now she's blonde and left handed I was so upset at the time by this comment but now when I remember it I just laugh. |
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These were sent to me from my lady friend in California. She is a blonde, she collects as many blonde jokes she can. He Favorited was; A brunette and a blonde are walking along in a park. The brunette says suddenly, "Oh, look at that dead bird." The blonde stops, looks up, and says, "Where?" The other one is; Polish Priest A blonde was telling a priest a Polish joke, when halfway through the priest interrupts her, "Don't you know I'm Polish?" "Oh, I'm sorry," the blonde apologizes, "Do you want me to start over and talk slower?" Hahaha I remember once I was working in the engineers office updating their specification files and a guy walked in ,saw me working and said to the others we're really in trouble now she's blonde and left handed I was so upset at the time by this comment but now when I remember it I just laugh. My lady friend has been collecting blonde jokes since high school. She loves them. It is like the fat old man jokes, I just accept them. Heck I feel I help write some. 
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Funny times.hilarious
 
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Funny times.hilarious 
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Best blonde joke i'd heard so far..............nothing against blonde in my regard.
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A plane is on its way to Detroit when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves into an open seat in the first class section. The flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must sit in economy class because that's the type of ticket she paid for. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here." After repeated attempts and no success at convincing the woman to move, the flight attendant goes into the****it and informs the pilot and co-pilot that there's a blonde bimbo sitting in first class who refuses to go back to her proper seat. The co-pilot goes back to the woman and explains why she needs to move, but once again the woman replies by saying, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here." The co-pilot returns to the****it and suggests that perhaps they should have the arrival gate call the police and have the woman arrested when they land. The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the woman and whispers quietly in her ear, and she says, "Oh, I'm sorry," then quickly moves back to her seat in economy class. The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to get her to move back to economy without causing any fuss. "I told her first class isn't going to Detroit." ridiculously funny..
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A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I have kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I have kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, Blonde." The Blonde then taped the note to the kid`s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Blonde."
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hahahaha......Just found these Jeff!...Laughed so hard I won't need to do my Palates today!...Spilled my coffee toO...
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