Topic: My turn. Ladies only please
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Sun 11/03/13 04:04 AM
I joined a long time ago but have never really been active. I have got a lot of messages but not from anyone interesting. I'm moving in a few months so I just updated my profile. Don't want to come across as arrogant or anything. I'm actually very humble. Too humble, maybe. And I HATE seeing myself in pictures, I don't really like any of them laugh

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Sun 11/03/13 11:07 AM
Exactly what is your question? You've said your photos suck, no one who writes you is interesting, and you haven't been active. I'm not sure what you're looking for here?

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Sun 11/03/13 11:52 AM
are u sure u don't drink??? coz your post doesn't sound to be written by a sober person.

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Sun 11/03/13 12:09 PM

are u sure u don't drink??? coz your post doesn't sound to be written by a sober person.


laugh drinker

hummingbird14's photo
Sun 11/03/13 02:17 PM
I just never go for the guys in the uniforms...sorry ;-)

PacificStar48's photo
Sun 11/03/13 02:26 PM
Welcome to Mingle.

Congratulations on your retirement and Thank You for your service to country. Hope it is an easy transition and you really enjoy the next phase of your life. Hope the civilian world is not too much of a shock. lol I remember the feeling.

Ok here is your review.

First I would suggest trying to shake off the feeling that you are a fish out of water or just spinning your wheels. You probably were not all that into it until now so your results can change if you make the effort. Now though it gives the tone you would rather than have a root cannel than be here and that always comes across to women who are intuitive. It might help if you get a mirror and smile when you write. I get it is going to be hard to shake off the tone that all soldiers tend to carry into speech when they are tense that are reporting to chain of command or ordering people. Give yourself time it will shift when you jump in the forums and make some friends to cross chat with. I pointed the above out because if you live around military it is familiar but civilians will pick up on it and often be intimidated and not always know why they resist you. If you are getting shot down after one or a few contacts and can't really tell why it might be why. Another trick will be as you write don't do so in uniform or even parts of it, put on civilian clothes.

I don't get the vibe you are drinking but NEVER drink and go on line because it comes through clear as a bell. If you have made the mistake of doing so it is out there and you may have a hard time living it down. Even if you did it on another site. I don't know, don't care, I am not the staff on this site or the booze police. I figure you were entitled to let your hair down a little getting home just don't make it a fallback habit while your getting back into the world.

Your text is killing you. Delete it and start over after reading some of the tutorial threads. Think of the mission of writing a profile. It is to connect with a female and tailor every word and every picture to appeal to that soft target. Be positive, welcoming, subtle, and as minimally aggressive as possible. You are not in charge and you have no rank. The later is a good thing because that makes you neither private or commander but still in demand. Or be real at 45 still up to bat. :)

I can believe you have never been married but the average civilian will struggle with that. They are going to figure you are on the down low or left more than one "family" behind which is anything but fair but if you had a relationship you might want to own up to "close no cigar" or that you were putting it off until you could "stay someplace long enough to do it right" as I have seen many times with good service members. You surely won't be the only guy to carry a torch for someone for a long time either. The thing is civilians are in a different mind set so explaining will be part of the deal and not much way around it. Heading it off at the pass in a positive way is probably better.

Having an adult kid you will be moving to will probably be a bigger deal than you think when it comes to dating. That just screams of Daddy drama. The picture at first glance of you and the female is not good. Body language is everything in photos. You, and she I am guessing this is your daughter), may see this as one of the happiest moments in your lives but other women are going why is he grabbing this woman in a take down move. Families reuniting as adults is not rare you will find support for that with many of the single parents here.

Moving is going to be a bit of a problem. When guys are short timers getting relocated they look like a scammer on line. Sadly too many real creeps from where ever take being a soldier as a persona. If you don't go the extra mile to document you do in fact live where you say you do you will be dead in the water. Here a picture is worth a thousand words. Building date clocks and Newspapers with your face are going to be what it takes with most gals that have been on line more than six months because they have already been romanced by a scammer almost as many times as you polish your boots.

The photos of you with the weapon slung on your back relaxed talking to someone I am checking out your buns as a one time military wife thinking of the good old days but too many women will find that chilling and intimidating like the face on one of you scowling in the unit area. You can share them later but I would take them off your profile or at least move them down far enough they have to have clicked your photos and formed the first impression of you as a civilian. That you are retired I think you are going to probably want to not even use the dress uniform as a lead shot. Why? Because this is like standing in a suit where the Ex-wife has been cut out; it is part of your past not your now, and probably not your future. You're young enough to protect and serve in another capacity but You really don't want someone chasing you down for your retirement check do you? You will get less of that if you just put what ever you are now. Weather it is student, volunteer, or aspiring ------;fill in the blank.

You obviously have interests I would capitalize on that.

I'm hungry for lunch. Good luck.