Topic: Sapphire Waterfall
jfinn009's photo
Tue 05/24/16 12:53 PM
I had at once felt the essence to my effervescence.
Blood boils as time spent,
But time was narcoleptic.
Like the white mist as it passes through the septum,
I felt as low as the bass, with a little more treble.
Head aches from a stampede of thoughts.
A sudden revelation to the answers that I sought.
A tower of knowledge, and I was standing at the top,
But destined to lose it all once this world falls apart.

I'm zoning in and out of what appears to be a dream.
My soul is crying out,
But nobody hears the scream.
The pressure of an ocean, I'm a lonely submarine.
Even though this holy moment has me feeling so serene.

Heart beats to a frequency I am unable to read.
And every breath reflects eternity.
Conscious is surfacing...

Ladywind7's photo
Tue 05/24/16 03:43 PM
You are a great writer. I felt every line… I feel as low as the bass with a little more treble..… That metaphor is superb.

no photo
Tue 05/24/16 10:49 PM
"A tower of knowledge, and I was standing at the top,
But destined to lose it all once this world falls apart..."

....the state of many, even myself....knowing what to do, knowing what to believe in......but because of the oppressing situation, everything fades away....
-thank you mr.writer! You're great!

no photo
Tue 05/24/16 11:29 PM
Honestly, I like it- you had me at stanza 2 and 3 cause stanza one had a few words that required a dictionary. But on a general note, you have a gift to recon with