I originally wrote this in onother thead for the thread starter who was asking where the nice guys were well upon further inspection, said user's account had been removed. I thought I should not let all of this goto waste so here it is ladies, a how to for the first date. Paying attention is key, we know you do anyway but you need to focus on the small things even the things that we all take for granted.
Enjoy.

There are nice guys everywhere and there are ash0les, d!cks, and pigs everywhere else too. Nice guys are hard to find because they are not usually in the settings many women go looking for men. I can tell you you will rarely find a nice guy in a bar or club, a party or football game. Most nice guys are hard to find for one sole reason; that reason is most nice guys rarely drink or party and that rules alot of typical events out. Sure, you may get lucky and find one but if you are thinking of a nice guy in the same way as I am thinking, you wont find them there. I am a nice guy who has been on 4 dates in the past 3 months and guess what; I havent kissed, made a move on or slept with any of them. I did take my jacket off at the movies once because my date was cold.

At the end of the night when you are making your assesment, think about these few things.

Did he offer to pay even if he did not. If he offered and or paid, that is a plus unless his next move is to take you home with him or go home with you. (On the flip side, while paying by the male is customary, this is a first date, you should atleast offer to pay your half, most men will turn you down but the gesture really means alot, to us)

Did you feel a real connection with him or is he simply good looking? A real connection can often be mistaken for sexual or physical feelings, think long and hard on this one.

Was he on time or was he late?

How was he dressed? Casual, trashy, gheto, upscale? The way a man dresses really tells alot about his person, his lifestyle, his personality.

If he picked you up, was his car clean and orderly? A man car only amplifies his living habits. If his car is really messy, his house is usually trashed. If everything has a place and is in it you can almost bet his house is the same way.

Was his conversation interesting? Think about the future. If he is boring now, more than likely he will be always. (First date shyness or nurvousness is expected so take this into account)

Is he nurvous? If he is not, it is because of one of two things. He is confident and calm or he is expecting something and that may just be all that is on his mind. Again, pay close attention to the actions and words of your date.

In my opinion, the small things are what count and matter, not the big things. Pay close attention to ALL the small things, the little, often overlooked things men and women take for granted.

You dont have to be young to be stupid and you dont have to be old to be wise. Age often matters but sometimes you can find someone who is wise beyond their age but on the flip side, for men, you often find they are quite stupid, literally and figuratively.

How do they speak? Alot can be said about a man who speaks well and proper. Intelligence is often expressed not by knowledge but simpy by a conversation and how it is carried out.

Finally, the call, ah the call. Everything you have ever heard about the first post date call you can throw out. If he waits a few days it is for one of two reasons;
One: he does not want you to think he is desperate so he waits to call though every hour that goes by without hearing your voice he is anticipating calling you. This kind is a keeper and it meant to him, he really likes you and the date went well. Pay attention closely to what it is he first talks about on that call.
Two: He calls a few days later because you really arent on his mind but perhaps he still is respectful and implies that the date was fine he was just not head over heals for you. This is a good guy but it just did not click.

The other option is he calls you damn near at first light the next day. lol These are the best. The would have called you as soon as he got home but judging on your date going so well, you two stayed out later than anticipated and he does not want to wake you or keep you up. These are typically the men the think of others before themselves but feels the urge in their gut to talk to you once more. This all means he loved the date, loved everything about you and want to know more. A second date with him is always a good one.

Lastly, this is more advice rather than things to look at. DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT sleep with your date on the first date or even the second or third or fourth. If he lasts without sex and, this is important, without the HINT of future sex he is into you and not so much as the manly urge to screw. Don't even make out with him. If the guy can enjoy you while you have your clothes on though conversation and dinners, movies etc. the sex will come naturally, eventually.

Thanks for reading all this but someone needed to point out the men who make good guys like me look bad. Now if only I could get out there and apply these things I was brought up with I would do well. And guess what guys, I owe it all to my MOM!!!

KUDOS to your MOM!!!


She seems to have raised a really informed and sensitive man.

Snatch him up ladies!

wow i'm glad at least one guy gets it hahaha

Kudos! Glad I'm not the only one who thinks that way

haha My mom is Italian and it shows. She is a smartass, a jokester and the most incredable woman I have ever met. I love her to death. I guess you could say I am a real genuine mommas boy. lol

very good advice

Well said!! Thanks for the advice!!!

You're quite welcome.

On a side note.
This was not an attempt to get in the good graces of anyone. I have not really had a good date in a long while and never had a good relationship so I will do just fine without one. I would like one but Ill do ok without. This was meant solely to inform.
But, lol, if you do read my profile and like what you read and saw then please, say hello. It is a rare occasion that I get unexpected mail as it always seems I am the one sending it and not getting it. Goodluck to all of you, women and men alike. Life is too short to settle and too long to do wrong. lol Im a poet and I didnt even know it. haha ok Ill stop now.

buddy i am glad you said those things to let that all men are not as@hole@

You Live In Texas!!!!

sweet guy why isn't he taken

'Cause he lives in Texas!!! Otherwise, I'd take him!!!

Very wise advice from such a young man! Good for you! I'm impressed.

LC

bump...a lot of truth in this.

ain't this cute. a man says what decent guys would like and automatically "his mom raised him right". so much for us dads raising kids, we'll just screw them all up huh?

generally.

as a single mother who has a son about to turn 18, i have to say how very impressed i was when i read you're advice. it has given me hope that maybe the talks i have with my son are sinking in one way or another!

VERY IMPRESSED

Couldn't have been said any better

and oh so true

Cheers to ya dear