Some people are just naturally loving caring individuals. They would make a good caregiver. Would you say you are that kind of person? Or are you more selfish and couldn't handle a situation like that?

Are you self centered focused on You?

Thinking about this topic, I'd say that there are people that are are nurturers. I feel that way towards animals, not to people. I'm probably one of the few women that will admit to not wanting kids and not liking to be around babies.

I think people that love animals are kind people Cat.

I think there is many people out there that do not want children.

So what you say, is not that you're alone in thinking that.

Just Having a kid doesn't make a woman a good mother.

It takes a lot more to make a good mother.

Thanks, Toody. I made a decision to not have children. I would not be a good mother, so it was good for me.

My marital status has always been "single with vasectomy". And I am now caring for my girlfriend who's just been diagnosed with mid-level Alzheimer's--at only 59.

my sister was not a good mother. both of her children died of diseases when they were young. She lived to be 94 and her husband 97.

I try to be a loving and caring individual as much as I can but as far as the caregiver well not so much.

Being naturally loving and caring doesn't mean you are -or should- be a great caregiver. I am naturally loving and caring but if I had to be a caregiver it'd wear me out and not make me happy as I give too much. And it's not my thing.
There's a whole range of expressing love and care without being a caregiver.

Also, selfish and self-centered are a world apart.

Point is, it takes a unselfish loving individual to be a care giver.


Self centered is definitely selfish!

I think people are insane.
People are selfish, deluded, self-gratifying, manipulative, inconsiderate and down-right rude.

I care about the person.
The better I know someone personally the more I care about them.

The way I care is to try to help someone deal with life in the moment.
When someone is sick, depressed, worried or afraid I help them focus on the moment.
I don't minimize their problem but I don't focus on it either.

If I am able to do something directly I will but as my health continues to deteriorate and it gets more difficult to survive, there are fewer things I can actually do.
However, If I can help someone find humor in their condition, it helps.
Laughter is the best medicine, I know...I live it.

Maybe time to broaden your mind a bit, never too late for that.
Selfish is nowhere near self-centered.
You also don't have to be unselfish to be a caregiver. Someone selfish can be too. A caregiver doesn't even have to be loving. It can be nothing more than a job or something you have to do because there are no other options.

The way you care about a person is a wonderful way! People could definitely learn from You.

We just disagree !

Maybe there is something you can be broaden on Somewhere!

I think this is kind of a bad question.

I mean it really hinges on a lot more than what's in the OP.

I think "Some people are just naturally loving caring individuals. They would make a good caregiver. Would you say you are that kind of person? Or are you more selfish...?"
is no different than asking "some people are just naturally nice. They make nice people. Would you say you're a nice person? Or are you a bad person?"


Not necessarily.
For one thing you don't differentiate between loving/caring behavior and loving/caring feelings, nor consider situational factors, or even if "loving caring" is actually something all that positive.

Ask any teenager about a parent saying to them "I did (x) because I love and care about you!"
All of that parents friends may say "oh, you're so loving and caring, you're a loving and caring person," whereas the teenager may be being stifled and smothered.


I would not say that is a "kind of person," especially not as an absolute definition of someone, unless I was in a conversation I wanted to get out of but had to give some kind of meaningless answer that stroked the other persons ego.


You don't really give a situation.
But the way this question is worded seems like it could easily be interpreted like: "Hey, this guy just got shot. Oh, you want to call an ambulance? You can't treat it yourself? Well you're just selfish since you can't handle a situation like that."

At best you mention "caregiver."
But that is a huge range. I mean loving and caring for a parent after knee surgery until they can walk again? Becoming the personal 24/7 nurse for a spouse that's in a persistent vegetative state? Dedicating my life to raising my autistic kids, or adopt them? Being a nurse and getting paid? A kindergarten teacher? Volunteering at a nursing home? An animal shelter? Just picking up and moving to a third world country to dig wells and build homes? Routinely baking cakes for my local church and donating clothes and some food for the food bank?

As anything less than martyring myself for the health/wellbeing/comfort/whatever of another considered selfish?


How you are kinda defining it here? Beats me.
What if I am constantly working on and thinking about how I can improve myself so that I can help others?
What happens if I spend all my time on myself so that I can at some point "care give" to others to the best of my ability, to give the best "care giving" possible, but I end up dying before I actually do any care giving?"

Ciretom

You really like to tear a thread apart!

Either a person (adult) is either loving kind or they're not.

Not referring to teenagers.

I disagree.
I've seen people who are loving and kind but are also sadistic and cruel or full of hatred and resentment. Picking and choosing to whom they are loving and kind.

Until you can live another's life from behind their eyes all you can do is assume.
Assuming someone is loving and kind based on specific behavior over a specific time for a specific purpose is delusional.

Tom, i feel like you are getting a bit off-track. The original question was very simple and requires a simple answer like cat gave. I personally have been a caregiver to a family member who died. I could do it for awhile, but not for years.
so yes, i could be a willing caregiver for a few months, but not for a year or more. And cat, I have to say, most of the time I prefer the company of animals over people.

Just because you wouldn't make a good caretaker does not mean you are self-centered. Some people just aren't cut out for it, or don't want that in their life. I don't want kids, but I can take care of my parents and others. Am I self-centered? No. Am I loving, yes. Everyone is selfish in one way or another; just like some are focused on themselves. I focus on my well-being. That doesn't make me self-centered or a bad caretaker.