Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.



Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels...Helllloooo!!!...bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!



Got really excited...finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months...box said "2-4 years!"



Trapped on an escalator for hours...power went out!!!



Tried to make Kool-Aid...wrong instructions...8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!



Tried to go water skiing...couldn't find a lake with a slope.



Lost breast stroke swimming competition...learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!



Got locked out of my car in rain storm...car swamped because soft-top was open.



The capital of California is "C"...isn't it???



Hate M & M's...they are so hard to peel.


Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days...instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108 lbs!!!



Couldn't call 911..."duh"...there's no "eleven" button on the stupid phone!!!