Topic: Long Distance Relations Need help
Singleguitar's photo
Fri 05/11/07 09:28 AM
Howdy All,

I have been chating with A women from Swedan 4 years now. We
talk on the phone she sounds so sweet. She offerd to pay my way to
swedan to be with her. I dont fly never have! SCARED to. So she is
coming here to New York. She's talking about getting Married. I know I
feel love for her. She crys! says how much she wants to be with me. Says
she's so in love with A guy she never met. Just I am A little confused
over it.I have chatted on cam with her so many times. Should I go for it
or what you've all had good advice. Your opinions please!


Always Willie


PetiteKitten's photo
Fri 05/11/07 09:30 AM
I wouldn't jump into marriage just yet, but I would most surely have her
come visit you and spend some time with you.......If anything at all,
have her stay with you for a few months and see how things
go.............I wish you the best of luck. I know how you feel,
Hun........

brokenheart74's photo
Fri 05/11/07 09:31 AM
4 years-wow! Good foundation. Listen to your heart, mind, and soul to
find your answer. You are the only one that can answer that question.
Good luck and best wishes!flowerforyou

TwilightsTwin's photo
Fri 05/11/07 09:31 AM
Take the risk! 4 years? Meet the woman!!! Meeting in person is the
final step...if you hit it off well...then start thinking about the
future. 4 years of talking...thats already a big commitment~!

Duffy's photo
Fri 05/11/07 09:34 AM
ditto to what pk says, except i would stretch it out, and not commit for
2 years. live with the woman, and see how it goes. if she loves you, it
will work. you remind me of the bride that got cold feet. she ran away,
then came back....
your exact words are....i know, i feel......what does that mean to you.
you know you feel....you know you feel what exactly....?flowerforyou

no photo
Fri 05/11/07 09:48 AM
my personal opinon..u cant really get to know someone on line or the
phone..has to be in person..again, my opionin..so..just be careful..i
know u can meet some pretty sweet people on line, I have, but u have to
in person as well..takes a while to get to know someone..:smile: :smile:

Dave2722's photo
Fri 05/11/07 09:56 AM
Just be sure that it is what you want... there are a LOT of immigration
laws and paperwork that has to be gone through if you do decide to get
married to her, and if you do... seek the help of a law firm that is
experienced in immigration laws and paperwork.

nurjoyce's photo
Fri 05/11/07 10:04 AM
i agree with sweet

no photo
Fri 05/11/07 10:22 AM
4 years yes that is quit long time chatting online and over the phone
but truly be care is all I'm going to saying. I been there and find out
something totally diffent about getting someone from over seas:(

eileena9's photo
Fri 05/11/07 02:04 PM
I agree with most people's comments on here. Treat it as if it was a
friendship with a woman close by and you wanted to take it further. I
don't think you would turn to a female friend and say "Let's get
married" without taking some time to be sure it's the right decision.
Good luck either way!flowerforyou

Jess642's photo
Fri 05/11/07 02:20 PM
Your country has visitor visas...she can come to visit you on one of
those visas.

If you find that this woman is all you thought her to be, and really,
who doesn't want to have their partner as their best friend? Then the
foundations of the friendship you have developed are good.

Marry? Why? The only reason I can see for you to marry her, whether in
love with her or not, at any stage of the game, is because she doesn't
qualify for residency any other way.


On a second visit, if not on a visitor's visa,
your country has a fiancee visa, which is valid for three months...and
in that time you will have to marry, if it is both what you want.

I am confused about why you need to marry. Enjoy her company,when she
visits, then send her home with warm wishes, and if you feel for her as
strongly as she does you.... then it is no different to any other woman
you have met in your life.

And if marriage is part of your belief system...then it isn't rocket
science.

She has offered to pay for you to visit her, and you declined, and so
she has compromised and said she will come to you...sounds like she is
doing all the work at her expense..

Meeshep's photo
Fri 05/11/07 02:26 PM
Well put Jess.flowerforyou

no photo
Fri 05/11/07 02:29 PM
Knowing somebody from afar and living with that person is a totally
different ballgame. Meet her and get to know her personally first,
anything else has time.

Singleguitar's photo
Fri 05/11/07 09:09 PM
Howdy All,

I'd like to say foremost thanks to you all. I am seeing this
in focus now. Your A great Bunch of people! once again Thanks.


Always Willie

no photo
Fri 05/11/07 11:45 PM
i tried the lond distance stuff and its a big .. no no!