An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I know some women like that.)

Starfish don't have brains. (I know some people like this, too.)

Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.

Marriage changes passion...suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

I don't approve of political jokes...I've seen too many of them get elected.

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.