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Topic: Self Accountability
msharmony's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:23 PM
Edited by msharmony on Sun 10/11/09 01:23 PM
I have noticed a trend in our culture away from self accountability. It seems like EVERYTHING has a label, clinical or social, attached to it. Those who drink too much have alcoholism, those who have too much promiscuous sex are sex addicted. Those who harm their children ,are suffering from some hormonal imbalance. Does anyone think the trend will ever come back for people to accept their own choices as just that and maybe we can start overcoming obstacles as a culture instead of wasting so much time on the finger pointing and blame game and even worse, the JUST THE WAY IT IS,,,excuse.

no photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:25 PM
It would be nice if we reached that point as a society, but I'm not holding my breath for it to happen any time soon.

Dragoness's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:25 PM
The only way for this to happen is for each person to be accountable.

How can we make another self accountable if we do not live in their bodies and live their lives?

no photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:26 PM

The only way for this to happen is for each person to be accountable.

How can we make another self accountable if we do not live in their bodies and live their lives?


Well said.flowerforyou

MeChrissy2's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:28 PM
We can teach our children to be accountable, responsible and respectful. Atleast that's what I'm doing. Change begins with a single step.


Dragoness's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:30 PM

We can teach our children to be accountable, responsible and respectful. Atleast that's what I'm doing. Change begins with a single step.




It is hard to do it as a parent too, because we always want to run in and save them when they mess up.

I too attempted to do that same thing with mine.


IndnPrncs's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:32 PM
I agree with you ladies and add that in our society it has become acceptable to find excuses.. Dr's/psychologists give a lot of people excuses.. Some are real, some are not.. Truly some people don't know why they do what they do, so there has to be a reason and why shouldn't everyone else jump on the bandwagon rather than take responsibility... whoa

prisoner's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:32 PM
A lot of people need a goodslaphead be seeing you

MeChrissy2's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:33 PM


We can teach our children to be accountable, responsible and respectful. Atleast that's what I'm doing. Change begins with a single step.




It is hard to do it as a parent too, because we always want to run in and save them when they mess up.

I too attempted to do that same thing with mine.




Dragoness, we can save them by teaching them the lesson. Compared to my siblings/extended family, I am the harsh mom. But my daughters are strong and responsible young ladies. I can't change the world but I can teach my kids what's right.

Dragoness's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:34 PM
:thumbsup:



We can teach our children to be accountable, responsible and respectful. Atleast that's what I'm doing. Change begins with a single step.




It is hard to do it as a parent too, because we always want to run in and save them when they mess up.

I too attempted to do that same thing with mine.




Dragoness, we can save them by teaching them the lesson. Compared to my siblings/extended family, I am the harsh mom. But my daughters are strong and responsible young ladies. I can't change the world but I can teach my kids what's right.



IndnPrncs's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:35 PM
Chrissy I'd like to agree with you and it seems so obvious but that's not always the case.. A child can grow up in the best home/worst home, with rules/no rules, integrity/or none, etc and still end up so different than what the parents/parent raised them to be or showed them by example... I've seen it, watched it and it's been proven... Herdity vs. environment and then you have "some are just the way they are, bad/evil or good and kind..

Dragoness's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:37 PM

I agree with you ladies and add that in our society it has become acceptable to find excuses.. Dr's/psychologists give a lot of people excuses.. Some are real, some are not.. Truly some people don't know why they do what they do, so there has to be a reason and why shouldn't everyone else jump on the bandwagon rather than take responsibility... whoa


It depends on what you do with the information or "reasons". If you are given help in understanding something that is happening or has happened and you wallow in self pity then you will be stuck there.

If you are given help as information and use it to get past what is afflicting you in life and move forward then the "excuses" as you put it are helpful.

Each person has to do what is best for them at the time.

Standing on the outside of a person we can assume we know what is best for them but we more than likely will be wrong.

It is best to let them do what they will need to to live.

Dragoness's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:40 PM

Chrissy I'd like to agree with you and it seems so obvious but that's not always the case.. A child can grow up in the best home/worst home, with rules/no rules, integrity/or none, etc and still end up so different than what the parents/parent raised them to be or showed them by example... I've seen it, watched it and it's been proven... Herdity vs. environment and then you have "some are just the way they are, bad/evil or good and kind..


I had this problem. Heredity overruled my examples and teaching with my son, he took after his dad. It has made his life rough.

MeChrissy2's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:40 PM

Chrissy I'd like to agree with you and it seems so obvious but that's not always the case.. A child can grow up in the best home/worst home, with rules/no rules, integrity/or none, etc and still end up so different than what the parents/parent raised them to be or showed them by example... I've seen it, watched it and it's been proven... Herdity vs. environment and then you have "some are just the way they are, bad/evil or good and kind..


Joy, I'm with you. We can only try and do our best. Be the example in the way we live our lives and treat others. I'm by no means saying it's the answer but we have to start somewhere.


IndnPrncs's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:41 PM
I don't disagree but when you see someone rob a store and they blame it on not having a job, well you might feel sorry for them.. then you see 11% of the nation out of a job and most of them are not robbing stores so it can't be societies fault. That's just one example.. I know some things are hard to get over and some people don't have the capacity to do it... But if you can reason logically there is no reason to blame everything else on your actions...

Dragoness's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:48 PM

I don't disagree but when you see someone rob a store and they blame it on not having a job, well you might feel sorry for them.. then you see 11% of the nation out of a job and most of them are not robbing stores so it can't be societies fault. That's just one example.. I know some things are hard to get over and some people don't have the capacity to do it... But if you can reason logically there is no reason to blame everything else on your actions...


Well and my point was that we cannot force self accountability on others.

In your example that person needs to go to jail, regardless to the excuse used, but will we force self accountability into them? Probably not.

It is actually a criminal mentality to blame others for their actions. Examples:

I hit you because you couldn't shut your mouth.
I keyed your car because you couldn't be faithful.
I drove drunk because noone would come and get me.
I got drunk because my boyfriend cussed me out.

They don't sound that criminal but they do go into that mentality.

no photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:49 PM
There was a time when people believed in heaven and hell, where there was no doubt as to the preferred destination. The real point to life was essentially to build a stairway to paradise, which does not mean that people behaved perfectly. The world was still a very cruel place. People believed in a judgement at some point in the after...life. Now it appears that fewer people believe in this life after death, thus a lowering of the standards for interactive/intercoursive responsibility.
The essayist George Orwell although an avowed atheist believed that this disbelief was the greatest cause of the breakdown of moral and social behaviour. The loss of a belief effected a loss of personal responsibility.

Dragoness's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:51 PM

There was a time when people believed in heaven and hell, where there was no doubt as to the preferred destination. The real point to life was essentially to build a stairway to paradise, which does not mean that people behaved perfectly. The world was still a very cruel place. People believed in a judgement at some point in the after...life. Now it appears that fewer people believe in this life after death, thus a lowering of the standards for interactive/intercoursive responsibility.
The essayist George Orwell although an avowed atheist believed that this disbelief was the greatest cause of the breakdown of moral and social behaviour. The loss of a belief effected a loss of personal responsibility.


I disagree. The religious have the greatest scapegoat of all. Satan is the fault of all evil they or any other human does.

How can they be in control of themselves if they believe they are pawns to the two entities playing them like chess peices?

no photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:51 PM
I didn't do it!

Dragoness's photo
Sun 10/11/09 01:52 PM

I didn't do it!


Me niether!

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