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| Topic: Sex Facts- Calories And Weight Loss | |
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SEX ... THE BEST WAY TO GET IN SHAPE! Giving head... massages the jaw....while burning 32 calories. Swallowing foreign body juices is actually like taking vitamins and it whitens your teeth The American Dental Association says that semen cuts plaque better than mouth wash, so suck a Dick and save a smile. Having nice sex burns 358 calories. Having rough sex [make it hurt] burns 543 calories. Take off her clothes with her consent.........................12 cal without......................187 cal Take off her Bra With two hands..........................8 cal With one hand.........................12 cal With mouth.............................85 cal Put on Protection hard .......................... 6 cal soft..........................315 cal Foreplay Looking for target...................8 cal Finding G spot ......................92 cal I don't Fu* king care.....................0 cal Entry Holding her..................12 cal On the floor.................8 cal With Different Position Missionary..........................358 cal Doggy...........................316 cal 69 lying...............................286 cal 69 standing.............................512 cal Italian hanger.........................912 cal Orgasm Real................................112 cal Faking................................315 cal After sex Lying in Bed............................18 cal Hop off the bed............................36 cal Wondering why she left pissed off...........816 cal Get dressed Quiet and calm...........................32 cal Rushing.........................98 cal Heard her friend opening the door.............1218 cal Heard her dad at the door.............1942 cal Her mom walking in..............................Priceless!!!  Sounds damn good to me. Except for mom walking in. At my age, mom would be using a hovermobile and run my azz over.   OK, I admit it ... This one made me spray ... ... No, not that ...  ... My drink, ya pervs ... Glad I could help a sista out.  
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I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!!
  
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I laughed so hard at this I almost wet myself. I couldnt stop giggling. This is too halarious.
No one could make this stuff up- Its just too good! |
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Edited by
heavenlyboy34
on
Sun 03/07/10 09:27 PM
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I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!! I'll be there to assist ASAP, beautiful!    
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I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!! I was thinking the same thing.. .
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I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!! I was thinking the same thing.. . methinks most of us would love to have this as out exercise program Remember..save a smile, suck a Dick  |
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When reading horizontally from Shakespeare's original published copy of Hamlet, the furthest left hand side reads 'I am a homosexual' in the last 14 lines of the book. Was this a message, or just a coincidence?
According to the World Health Organization, there are approximately 100 million acts of sexual intercourse each day. A female orgasm is a powerful painkiller (because of the release of endorphins), so headaches are in fact a bad excuse not to have sex. In a recent interview with 10 prominent sex therapists, the question was posed, 'What is the most important aspect in love making? One said 'relaxation', Three said 'honesty', and a whopping Six out of Ten said 'staying awake'. Lip stick was invented in the Egyptian times for women that specialized in oral sex. They wanted their lips to look more like their vaginas. Every year, 11,000 Americans injure themselves while trying out bizarre sexual positions. |
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Lip stick was invented in the Egyptian times for women that specialized in oral sex. They wanted their lips to look more like their vaginas. Yeah, that's always been my goal in life |
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Kissing was created to actually simulate something that was rather gross. Maybe I'll write about it tomorrow... I just ate something and I don't want to get sick thinking about it
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Edited by
ArtGurl
on
Mon 03/08/10 12:15 AM
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Don't you dare ruin kissing for me Angel!!!
 Lori that is too funny!
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According to the World Health Organization, there are approximately 100 million acts of sexual intercourse each day. 75% is of people pleasuring themselves 
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Humans aren't the only ones who masturbate. Cows, horse, dolphins, monkeys, porcupines and even cats have been seen masturbating in the wild. I'm wondering if my cat would use one or both paws.... 
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I'm wondering if my cat would use one or both paws....
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I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!! I was thinking the same thing.. . methinks most of us would love to have this as out exercise program Remember..save a smile, suck a Dick Think I'll keep smiling, thanks.....
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Humans aren't the only ones who masturbate. Cows, horse, dolphins, monkeys, porcupines and even cats have been seen masturbating in the wild. I'm wondering if my cat would use one or both paws.... maybe he's one that switches |
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Giving head... massages the jaw....while burning 32 calories. Semen contains creatine, citric acid, nitrogen, vitamins C, B12 and E, calcium, potassium, nitrogen, vitamin B12, protein and zinc. All of which are extremely healthy! He's a little known fact that I learned when I was a semi-pro body builder. The pros (the schwarzenegger types) regularly (on a daily basis) masturbate and digest their own semen. No they're not gay, and no they're not crazy. They do this because of the extremely high level of creatine and protein that's in semen. More than eating a thick juicy steak. Creatine and protein are two of the most used body building supplements, and they both help you to build muscle (which means it helps you to burn fat and be thinner). The more semen you digest, the quicker you lose that unsightly weight. A study published in the International Journal of Sports Medicine showed that creatine helps you to burn extra calories when taken. And we all know that muscles are made up of protein (and are the opposite of fat). I'm sure one of these days we'll all be hearing about the semen diet... Thanx for sharing that with me excuse me while i puke!!  Anna x
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My gawd..this joke is like the energizer bunny, it just keeps going and going and going.
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Edited by
AngelArs
on
Tue 03/16/10 09:30 PM
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...did somebody say bunny....?
 .  .
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I don't know about y'all, but I know what exercise program I am starting. ASAP!!! I was thinking the same thing.. . Were all thinking the same thing..... 
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Now thats an exersize plan that is easy to stick to!
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