Warning! If you are involved with anyone that has jealous tendencies, the realationship is heading for failure. Save yourself the anguish, and the heartache. Plenty here have been in that in situation. You get accused of doing something you didn't do. Jealousy is lack of trust. You can never win that trust with someone that is that insecure. So if you get the red Flags early on. DO NOT IGNORE THEM! Little things like. "Who where you talking to"? or "You must be chatting with someone else, I'll let you go": Sound familiar. You deserve better,. No one is that desperate. You can't change the way they think, only they can. Peace

I agree...trust is a big issue with me in a relationship. If you can't trust the person, there is no relationship

It's worse then other person doesn't trust you. No matter you do or didn't do doesn't mean sh*t to the Jealous party. I've been ther, more then once.

good advice.
Trust is the foundation of a relationship
Jealousy is the decay.

I couln't agree more!! Been the brunt of jealous acts numerous times and its doomed for failure!! Avoid the jealousy and the drama at all costs!!

It's disheartnening to read or hear someone say My boyfriend/girlfriend is very jealous. They don't understand the impact of that statement.

Brian
"Trust is the foundation of a relationship
Jealousy is the decay. "

I agree with that to a certain degree, if you have been cheated on repeatedly most people begin to feel as if no one can be trusted. For me everyone has been jealous of something at some point in their lives and that only makes us human. It's only a emotion that all people deal with, for example my older sister is jealous of me, but it all depends on how a person deals with it and have it under control.

It's impossible to have anything under control, when it's the other person that has the jealousy issues. If you think you are in control of such a situtation, you are only foling yourself.

it is hard ot trust when SO many secrets and things done behind the back (yes cheating was one). I don't have a problem UNLESS I'm not involvedin anyway -- If yu are talking to some one why not tell the person some of it (the funny parts are always good) explain who the person is to you etc.....

My 1st ex cheated big time on me, me next ex for an example -- I would walk into the room and he would hurry and shut down windows so I could see who he was talking to or saying (not that i was even looking but that got me wondring wiht his attitude). The next boyfriend messed up his letter and I got it instead of telling his "friend" that he changed his password so I would be able to get into it so she could write him now. OK
So yeah now I'm very hesitant over a lot of things -- most likely one reason why I just want friends now as I have issues to work out.

MAYBE this would help some of you too to let the other half be some what involved

Sort your stuff before entering relationships, expecting another to heal you, through a relationship, is a recipe for disaster.

Do the work! On you.

Insecurity, trust issues, low self esteem, all of it...do the work first.

Well Said Jess, Hey Country, You can't hold the whole male populaltion accountable for one idiot. I've always said,. I have to give to someone the benefit of the doubt, until they show me otherwise.

It does tear a person apart -- funny thing is as I was the one being accused of everything!! Even being lesbian because I hung out a lot with the neighbor!! UHG Just can't win

So yeah for me a lot of work to do for myself as I'm a good person and don't need to be treated that way and NO I'm not a jealous person unless they are extremely sneaky -- I never would shut down or hang up a phone because some one walked in a room!! Just shows how some are I guess.

I could trust easily enough (haaha that is my problem I TRUST too much right away YIKES) -- it isn't until "provoked i guess you could say is when it starts to creep in.

BUT Im far from ready to put anything into a relationship to that extent just because of life in general for me actually ... not real sure how I would handle going through the other stuff ... I got to be good friends with my 2nd ex's ex wife actually BUT I can't be friends with some person who made my life hell after she my boyfriend and her DID sleep together and admitted it and then to still be writing and stopping in and seeing her SORRY that is just a no go in my book --- so I had him leave

sorry didn't mean to come across like that -- NO I don't get jealous unless it is provoked -- and it really does take a bit to get that going -- way too much to write to explain situations, but it was because of a lot of them.

I'm just wore out from the deceipt and I was the one who left the relationships .....

I believe every one needs their own friends and their own time .. .I would go insane!! Infact I would push my 2nd ex to get away from it all and go out and have osme fun (farming so some one had to tend the animals). He went to Montana for a looong weekend and had fun and I was happy for him --- just him and another guy. I had NO problem wiht it.

I should have just shut up before I started YIKES

Tough to bounce back sometimes. Sounds like you got head on straight, well maybe slightly cocked Kidding.

slightly cocked is my story haahaa can I stick to it? please

I have enough bounce for awhile yet haahaa getting more bounce too as my pants are "echhm" getting smaller

when the time is right then the time is right -- I'm just not going to look ... I started out wanting too but then thought about it and I really don't have a lot of me to give between work and helping my daughter with the babe ... not fair to another person so I figure I also don't have a lot of friends (anohter toooo long of a story) so I thought I'd stay on and just be in the look out for friends :) (Uhmmm that would be without benefits!! haahaaa)

That'sa great attitude to have Country. Some just try to damn hard, then are easily disappointed. Been there. Just have fun, you never know what might happen in the mean time.

that's what i plan on doing and driving every one nuts while I'm doing it haahaaa

and WOW if some one pops into my life wiht all the chaos (not easy with a 20 year old and a 1 year old granddaughter and work a 2nd shift including weekends) and wants to stick around and is decent -- hmmmmmm might have possibilities haahaaa

I live with a saying "if all else fails .... laugh" and that is how I TRY to live my life. BUT then i get myself into trouble now and then and open my mouth and then have to try to explain what I'm trying to say and then then then well you have me haahaa

You all are great and it has helped me a lot since I started on these forums. THANK YOU

The forums have helped me when I was so down.
Sometimes I would be a miserable, depressed crying wreck. I would get on the forums, start interacting with the members, and be laughing my ass off. This is the part of the internet I appreciate the most. The reason I hang out here is to encourage others, help bring laughter into someones bad day. Repaying what others have done for me, and making friends along the way.

I love to be goofy and have fun with every one,if he does not trust me it will never work