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| Topic: Smile | |
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Aaaw thats so nice o certainly do now x
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So love to see these posts.
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^^^^^^
  
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Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off." The man replies, "And how would you do that?" The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside down from the ceiling. The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?" The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb." The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."
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A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a sheriff. He thinks he's smarter being a big shot lawyer from New York and has a better education than an sheriff from West Virginia. The sheriff asks for license and registration. The lawyer asks, "What for?" The sheriff responds, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign." The lawyer says, "I slowed down and no one was coming." "You still didn't come to a complete stop. License and registration please," say the sheriff impatiently. The lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my license and registration and you can give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket." The sheriff says, "That sounds fair, please exit your vehicle." The lawyer steps out and the sheriff takes out his nightstick and starts beating the lawyer with it. The sheriff says, "Do you want me to stop or just slow down?"
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Edited by
Kaustuv1
on
Fri 07/31/15 12:44 PM
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Two students were arguing when their teacher entered the classroom. The teacher says, ��Why are you arguing? One boy answers, ��We found a ten dollar bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie. "You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn'��t even know what a lie was." The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
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A guy and his wife are sitting and watching a boxing match on television. The husband sighs and complains, "This is disappointing. It only lasted for 30 seconds!" "Good," replied his wife. "Now you know how I always feel."
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A recent worldwide survey showed that out of 2,146,703,436 people, 94% were too lazy to actually read that number.
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A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream." Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!"
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Edited by
Kaustuv1
on
Fri 07/31/15 01:21 PM
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A teacher wanted to teach her students about self-esteem, so she asked anyone who thought they were stupid to stand up. One kid stood up and the teacher was surprised. She didn't think anyone would stand up so she asked him, "Why did you stand up?" He answered, "I didn'��t want to leave you standing up by yourself."
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Edited by
Kaustuv1
on
Fri 07/31/15 01:17 PM
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Teacher: "Kids,what does the chicken give you?"
Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"
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Thank youuuus.Kiss.    #Smiling. @Kiss..  |
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Signature whisky makes me
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Edited by
1Marie63
on
Sun 09/13/15 10:07 AM
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Teacher: "Kids,what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!" OMGGG LOOOOOOOOOL |
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