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Topic: What r u thinking about right now?? - part 57
thatonepogo's photo
Sun 05/15/16 01:42 PM

Am I supposed to delete this thing if I have a boyfriend?


Peggy gave you some great advice..
Is he out here?
Does he trust you?
Are you a heavy forum user?

Those are questions I asked myself and him and I chose to stay.

Best wishes in your relationship


Thank you.
I didnt even remember I had this profile up.
xD
So I doubt it'll be a problem.

SitkaRains's photo
Sun 05/15/16 01:54 PM


Am I supposed to delete this thing if I have a boyfriend?


Peggy gave you some great advice..
Is he out here?
Does he trust you?
Are you a heavy forum user?

Those are questions I asked myself and him and I chose to stay.

Best wishes in your relationship


Thank you.
I didnt even remember I had this profile up.
xD
So I doubt it'll be a problem.

Good that is the way it should be.

I am so looking forward to being in your town in July... Spending a whole month there. all around the state actually

adivorcedone's photo
Sun 05/15/16 04:25 PM
The only unwritten rule of online dating...if you have found a match, delete your profile or de-activate or hide your profile, its the honest thing to do....Otherwise, the grass is greener syndrome will persist....u can always come back if things dont work out...just saying...

Annierooroo's photo
Sun 05/15/16 04:33 PM
I agree with you adivorcedone

adivorcedone's photo
Sun 05/15/16 04:36 PM
Thanks, somehow I knew you would think like that to..


I am thinking if there are going to be any more, who agree...at least in principle ???

Annierooroo's photo
Sun 05/15/16 04:43 PM
Edited by Annierooroo on Sun 05/15/16 04:47 PM
I myself wouldn't want to look at others but others might not have the same thought

adivorcedone's photo
Sun 05/15/16 04:53 PM
I am thinking no one else....dang players....lmao...

peggy122's photo
Sun 05/15/16 05:17 PM

I am thinking no one else....dang players....lmao...


I personally would not deactivate as I enjoy the forum, but I would indicate in my profile that I am in a relationship and only here for the forum.

And I would adjust my email settings so that I couldn't receive any mail.

And I personally have no problem with him going through my account if he wanted to.

mariaclaracruz23's photo
Sun 05/15/16 05:24 PM
Thinking about the LAUNDRY...



jacktrades's photo
Sun 05/15/16 05:26 PM

The only unwritten rule of online dating...if you have found a match, delete your profile or de-activate or hide your profile, its the honest thing to do....Otherwise, the grass is greener syndrome will persist....u can always come back if things dont work out...just saying...
[/quote



There was a time when I would disagree with this but I met someone before and staying on the site ruined the relationship,if someone directs a comment towards you or you find someone logged in all the time it makes your mind wander, I should have deactivated my profile for awhile, I am not speaking for others just myself.

adivorcedone's photo
Sun 05/15/16 05:29 PM
Call me any name in the book....but if I was to find myself in a "forever" relationship, and lets be clear here, that will be the last relationship I will have time to cultivate...yeah! due to time constraints....you know , I dont plan on living forever, I would not waste another second dancing around these forums. Dont get me wrong I luv this place...but I luv her better...So yah...profiles deleted and lets begin the living in the now....baby......just saying...

adivorcedone's photo
Sun 05/15/16 05:47 PM
A Kiwi huh! Dang you dont get enough credit sometimes...unless you play for the All-Blacks huh.....But you expressed my sentiments exactly, nicely put...I salute you for that....

Now I am thinking about that flag dress again....where did she take it of and leave it...hmmm!!!

adivorcedone's photo
Sun 05/15/16 06:11 PM
Now I am thinking...is that pole at full or half mast...or is it hidden away...to only come out the next Kiwi celebration...

mariaclaracruz23's photo
Sun 05/15/16 06:18 PM
Those funny familiar forgotten feelings . . .

SitkaRains's photo
Sun 05/15/16 06:35 PM

Call me any name in the book....but if I was to find myself in a "forever" relationship, and lets be clear here, that will be the last relationship I will have time to cultivate...yeah! due to time constraints....you know , I dont plan on living forever, I would not waste another second dancing around these forums. Dont get me wrong I luv this place...but I luv her better...So yah...profiles deleted and lets begin the living in the now....baby......just saying...


I am going to disagree my friend...
I would stay out here knowing that I would have no problems giving him my password.. Heck he could answer the spam mail for me save me some time.

He would also know without a shadow of a doubt that I was totally his.

I have made some great friends out here. and I enjoy them.

peggy122's photo
Sun 05/15/16 06:44 PM
Edited by peggy122 on Sun 05/15/16 07:09 PM

Call me any name in the book....but if I was to find myself in a "forever" relationship, and lets be clear here, that will be the last relationship I will have time to cultivate...yeah! due to time constraints....you know , I dont plan on living forever, I would not waste another second dancing around these forums. Dont get me wrong I luv this place...but I luv her better...So yah...profiles deleted and lets begin the living in the now....baby......just saying...



There was a time when I would disagree with this but I met someone before and staying on the site ruined the relationship,if someone directs a comment towards you or you find someone logged in all the time it makes your mind wander, I should have deactivated my profile for awhile, I am not speaking for others just myself


The only unwritten rule for all couples that should be mandatory as far as I see, is the rule of TRANSPARENCY.

All other rules comes down to whatever a couple MUTUALLY decides makes each other comfortable, and people's comfort levels are often affected by their past relationship experiences .

My last boyfriend had been cheated on in his past, and consequently gave me my first experience with the demons of insecurity and suspicion.

First he had an issue with me meeting in public places with my male best friend which I understood and I ceased.

Then he started having a problem with me dancing with men other than him, although he belonged to the same dance community I belong to, where everyone dances with everyone else regardles of relationship status. So I minimized that too to alleviate his fears.

Then he had an issue when I received texts in his presence, and wanting to be transparent with him, I let him see my messages from males and females, but it still left him on edge even though he admitted there was nothing inappropriate there.

My point is this ...

If I cut off all emailers , and clearly indicate my relationship status in my profile, and give my partner access to my account , and he is still suspicious with all that transparency, then I will be on edge wondering what other parts of my life I will have to eclipse to alleviate his fears.

I have never cheated before. Nor am I suspicious or possessive by nature, and will allow my partner to maintain his habits prior to our relationship WITHIN REASON & TRANSPARENCY, and I will never choose to be with someone who doesn't allow me to do the same.

Again I really think it is up to the couples' personalities , their past experiences and their mutual comfort level.


adivorcedone's photo
Sun 05/15/16 07:07 PM
Big shout out of thanks to all the ladies who disagree....on this subject...remember you are on a dating site and as of date, you are still listed as single, but not available??? ironic.......


" Don't play hard to get, Play hard to forget"......just saying...

peggy122's photo
Sun 05/15/16 08:07 PM
Edited by peggy122 on Sun 05/15/16 08:21 PM

Big shout out of thanks to all the ladies who disagree....on this subject...remember you are on a dating site and as of date, you are still listed as single, but not available??? ironic.......


" Don't play hard to get, Play hard to forget"......just saying...




This is not merely a discussion about chatroom behavior or "play" D-one.

This is a much larger discourse about what a couple MUTUALLY decides are their relationship boundaries.

Even if both parties agree on deactivating their chatroom accounts, other issues regarding boundaries will have to be addressed as well

eg. Will other social media accounts need to be deleted too ? eg facebook, twitter, instagram etc?

What are the rules of engagement regarding hanging out with friends of the opposite sex?

What are the rules regarding texting and calling habits of friends and acquaintances of the opposite sex. etc.

All of these things have to be discussed and negotiated very early in a relationship.


It is also important to observe how our partners react to our everyday dealings with the opposite sex to guage if their expectations are realistic with our lifestyles and personalities.


That's why it's important to choose someone with compatible values regarding relationship boundaries ON THE WHOLE.

No one should assume that because they have strong convictions on certain boundaries that their partner will feel the same way and conform.



Annierooroo's photo
Sun 05/15/16 10:50 PM
I am watching home and away. It got me thinking about the legacy one leaves when they die.

jasmine825's photo
Mon 05/16/16 03:00 AM
About my ALADIN

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