i have been here for about a month and really puzzled by men saying something but doing the entire opposite...

they cant be man enough to say what they really feel when its really just a matter of their not interested or married or after something else

it seems i am venting and talking to myself here but i am just so puzzled and wondering if there is something wrong with my profile

If a man is interested... They give you the most precious thing of all
Time...
They spend time getting to know you...
They aren't in a all fired hurry...

They are interested in "YOU" simply you getting to know you...


Most people say things and mean them and yet there are some that their actions speak volumes of something else.

I tend to stick with the ones that say and do the same things.

Welcome to mingle scepticalsoulmate!

All you can do is observe the consistency of someone's attentive actions toward you over time to know if they are serious, and to learn the type of person they are AS A WHOLE. As sitka said , the time he takes to get to know you and enjoy being with you OVER TIME., because some are only able to do it for a week or two and then move on to the next conquest.

But Im concerned about your chatname honey. We have all had our dating challenges or we would not have resorted to the online chat world, but adopting a chat label like the one you chose, is like stamping your turbulent dating history on your forehead, and may sabotage the type of responses you were hoping to get. Just some food for thought....

Good luck to you dear!

That's why I said you can only learn that over time. And you are not alone by the way. Most of us have had dozens of emailers who stopped communicationg after a week or even a month . It's a chance we all take I guess .

And maybe you can call yourself Spunky or Sassy Soulmate instead .

thanks for pointing that out dear you think i should change my id name to clueless

there were a few who would say they are sincere and that they are giving their time but then after a week they just deactivate their account just when i am about to believe them they disappear

I could offer some juicy suggestions if you will permit me.

juicy? it might attract the wrong men

i see its a comfort to know i am not alone then...can i change my name here? how pls?

Um... I think you may have to deactivate this account and start a new one using a different e-mail address. But maybe someone can confirm that as I am not sure

I am not sure if I would have "soul mate in my user name period. And spunky not sure about that one at all.


And yes you would have to deactivate and come back. Once you chose the user name it is your with this account

thanks peggy i guess ill give it a go for a month or so then just move on thanks again sweety

have you met some real good guys here?

There is an old sales persons meme that says

Once you can fake sincerity you have it made.

So there is a clue there.
Personally I like your chat name.

Your profile has a bit to say about what you don't want which tends to be negative and wont do much about stopping the sales person type.
In fact they will just use that information along with the stuff you say you do want to create the image that they think will get them what they want.

Yes it is frustrating but that's why you have to match words with actions and take the time to see past pretence.

I'm the only real good guy that Ive meet here.

I don't think there is anything wrong with the user name,

And to make you feel a little better, MANY of the accounts that get deactivated are because they are scammers, and have been reported.

This site has an issue with scammers signing up, but the mods do their best to get rid of them as quickly as possible, and if they are reported and looking into the accounts get deactivated.

So if someone deactivates their account on you, don't take personally, it most likely was someone that was playing you from the start.

I would say the BEST way to meet someone genuine from this site is through the forums, sure there are some that don't participate...but generally the ones who are at least semi-regular posters are real.

Good Luck in your search!

thanks dear

i guess ill just give it sometime...now that i know where to go and who to talk to. thanks