A 6-year-old and a 4-year-old are upstairs in their bedroom.
"You know what?" says the 6-year-old. "I think it's about time we start cussing.
"The 4-year-old nods his head in approval. The 6-year-old continues.
"When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm going to say hell and you say ***."
"OK!" The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.
Their mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6-year-old what he wants
for breakfast.
"Aw hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios."
WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up,
and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit,
slapping his rear every step. The mom locks him in his room and shouts
"You can just stay there till I let you out!"
She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4-year-old,
and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast young man?
"I don't know," he blubbers, "But you can bet your *** it won't be Cheerios!"

As I've said.
I love all races... the only races I have a problem with are Marathons.

(I, of course am very sorry to waste the letters that I had to spend on this joke if not found funny, because these letters are not organic.)

This is SO bad that I'm almost embarrassed to post it:

Man with an bad stomach:
I farted in an elevator yesterday... it was wrong on so many levels.

(And so is this joke.)

This is definitely not for women.

There was a baby born in the hospital and he weighed ten pounds.
The odd thing about him was his body weighed five pounds and his
testicles weighed five pounds.
All the nurses and even the doctor didn't know what to do with him.
Then, the chief surgeon walked in and asked what was wrong.
The head nurse replied, "We don't know what to do with this baby."
So the chief surgeon took one look and said,
"You should put him into mental institution."
"Why? " asked the head nurse.
"Well," replied the chief surgeon, "Take a look at him.
The boy is obviously half nuts."

I wish i was better at predicting having sex... I never see it cumming.