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Topic: Divorced Hell
Geo4235 Joined Mon 08/14/06 Posts: 328	Mon 09/04/06 10:09 AM Edited by Geo4235 on Mon 09/04/06 10:09 AM
Am I the only one on this planet that can't seem to get over my divorce. It's like a bad dream that won't go away. I'm embarrassed to even say, but it's true. Any real suggestions?

lolabear Joined Wed 08/30/06 Posts: 2	Mon 09/04/06 10:13 AM
If you love the person you wont get over it for a while, but like me it will take time and I am sure that we can both get over it. You will be happy and stronger and better for it.

Geo4235 Joined Mon 08/14/06 Posts: 328	Mon 09/04/06 10:18 AM
Yea, well, it's been 3 years and I'm still doing stupid self abusive behavior....it's nuts....I know I am doing it, but I don't seem to care and yet I want to stop and get it on, get past it and move on

amacree Joined Fri 09/01/06 Posts: 149	Mon 09/04/06 10:28 AM
well it hasnt been that long for me but i know what u r talkin bout. i do the same thing all the time. i still havent figured out what to do myself. my family has been no help cause i am the only one in it 2 get divorced so if u think of ne thing let me know and ill do the same for u.

dewdrew Joined Wed 08/30/06 Posts: 422	Mon 09/04/06 11:04 AM
one never gets over it,......... just go buy a new car and then get laid....doesnt get you over it but you can slide into both of them and it feels really really good lol

Geo4235 Joined Mon 08/14/06 Posts: 328	Mon 09/04/06 11:13 AM
Never? I don't think I can deal with never. Closure is a must, some sort of conclusion, or compromise.

amacree Joined Fri 09/01/06 Posts: 149	Mon 09/04/06 11:20 AM
well i am workin on puttin as many miles between me and my ex as possible. i am hopin that if i only have 2 see him a few times outta the year when we exchange the kids for his visitations that it will help me move on.

lynn Joined Mon 09/04/06 Posts: 24	Mon 09/04/06 11:24 AM
I have been divoreced for 10 years, We share childeren which made it hard at first, both were angry. But in time things changed, I wont't tell you that you'll wake up one morning and it will all be over, But you will get to a point that you feel better about things. If you do not have kids with this person, cut off the ties for a while. If you see them all the time things will take longer.

Geo4235 Joined Mon 08/14/06 Posts: 328	Mon 09/04/06 11:47 AM
No kids in the relationship. Which is good. But, I just seem to think about it, why this? How come that? Why not this? Why not that? So self defeating and yet......sigh. I know it takes time but I just wish it would finally end.

lynn Joined Mon 09/04/06 Posts: 24	Mon 09/04/06 11:52 AM
Sounds like you blame yourself. It takes two to end a relationship. You have to let the blame go, I don't know what ended your marriage, but look at the other person. And think about the part they played in it all. Easy to say hard to do. You'll get it, Maybe you just need the right person to help you move on.

stephanie25 Joined Mon 08/21/06 Posts: 209	Mon 09/04/06 11:58 AM
i've never been married,but i have friends that are divorced. this is what they did.... preoccupy your time, hang out w/ friends, take up a hobby, work overtime, do something active to keep your mind off it, and like my one friend, he's been divorced only 1yr and he's engaged to my one friend that i introduced him to!

dewdrew Joined Wed 08/30/06 Posts: 422	Mon 09/04/06 12:02 PM
good advice really...

hosstin18 Joined Mon 08/07/06 Posts: 445	Mon 09/04/06 12:17 PM
lynn are you working for the prison in florence what is like

lynn Joined Mon 09/04/06 Posts: 24	Mon 09/04/06 12:28 PM
I work at one of the five facilities in florence, it is a good job

ezdoer Joined Sun 08/20/06 Posts: 2	Mon 09/04/06 12:42 PM
Hell, go out and find other people, I been divorsed 4 times and it didn't take long to get over it. The first one was the worst and took maybe a month. It sounds like your trying to live something that isn't there and never was.

lionsbrew Joined Tue 08/22/06 Posts: 14232	Mon 09/04/06 04:17 PM
my life only got better since we split or at least thats what i keep tellin myself but thats how i see it progress is progess even if it is recognizing the little things you couldnt do before

arizonagirl Joined Wed 08/09/06 Posts: 3	Mon 09/04/06 04:22 PM
no ur not the only one I still tell him I love him when I talk with him how sick is that it's been six months. I've been told to move on but I can't either. Good luck to you.

lynn Joined Mon 09/04/06 Posts: 24	Wed 09/06/06 08:31 PM
Hey, that I love you thing on the phone may be just a habit. They are hard to break. Pet names, and so on you just do it with out thinking.

PublicAnimalNo9 Joined Mon 09/04/06 Posts: 6278	Thu 09/07/06 12:15 AM
Mae West said it best..the best way to get over someone, is to get under someone

sage Joined Fri 09/01/06 Posts: 91	Thu 09/07/06 09:28 AM
Divorce can be a hard thing to get over, especially if you are still in love with the person. It also can take a toll on your ego, resulting in a sense of failure and embarrasment. Hold your head up, it will pass someday.