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| Topic: Most Problems don't really exist.. | |
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You cannot live for someone else. You cannot fix everyone and everything even though you wish you could. I think people need to learn more about when to let go and allow others to live their lives to the fullest of their capability, and learn to know what you can do to help them to help themselves. I really agree with this. I think of it as allowing others the rights to their problems and feelings. Often I believe the best response to someone who has described one of their problems is "Yeah, that's a problem alright." |
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So what's your problem? Do you have any problems? What do you conceive as a problem? Yes, I have problems. I think what were talking about is something that negatively impacts our peace of mind? Because I can be stubborn and selfish, when I feel that I have to do something that conflicts with what I want, I gotta problem. This was never a big problem; more like a medium one. :) I think it's a very human kind of thing. Once I saw it for what it was, I learned to accommodate it and it became just a small little annoying problem. Still, it persists. |
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Edited by
Jeanniebean
on
Mon 12/29/08 12:22 PM
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You cannot live for someone else. You cannot fix everyone and everything even though you wish you could. I think people need to learn more about when to let go and allow others to live their lives to the fullest of their capability, and learn to know what you can do to help them to help themselves. I really agree with this. I think of it as allowing others the rights to their problems and feelings. Often I believe the best response to someone who has described one of their problems is "Yeah, that's a problem alright." Yeh, sometimes they are just looking for someone to listen and vent on. I know I like to vent sometimes. But I don't expect other people to try to solve my problems, and yet I know I am guilty of trying to solve problems for other people. (Either that or I am accused of being uncaring because I don't bare the burden of their problems.) I think right now the biggest problem I have with myself is lack of self discipline and bad habits of loosing things (like my purse and my car keys) of not being more organized. I wish there was a pill I could take that would cause me to lean towards being more detail oriented and organized. One that if you took too many you might become obsessive compulsive.  |
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You cannot live for someone else. You cannot fix everyone and everything even though you wish you could. I think people need to learn more about when to let go and allow others to live their lives to the fullest of their capability, and learn to know what you can do to help them to help themselves. I really agree with this. I think of it as allowing others the rights to their problems and feelings. Often I believe the best response to someone who has described one of their problems is "Yeah, that's a problem alright." But I don't expect other people to try to solve my problems, and yet I know I am guilty of trying to solve problems for other people. (Either that or I am accused of being uncaring because I don't bare the burden of their problems.) . Same here. I'm pretty sure there's a middle in there though. Sort of like being engaged without being attached. That's my ideal. The idea of a nurse who cares comes to mind. |
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Problem –noun 1. any question or matter involving doubt, uncertainty, or difficulty. 2. a question proposed for solution or discussion. 3. Mathematics. a statement requiring a solution, usually by means of a mathematical operation or geometric construction. –adjective 4. difficult to train or guide; unruly: a problem child. 5. Literature. dealing with choices of action difficult either for an individual or for society at large: a problem play. (dictionary.com) Place your situation where it applies. If it doesn't fall under these basic categories, perhaps "problems" is a metaphor for something fictional you've created. Or even a cop-out of denial of responsibility. Everyone has unresolved issues pending in their lives. Some from the past which haven't been personally reconciled and forgiven, some in the future which are most likely speculative (like thinking out an entire argument in your head before the discussion) and those of the present which may be over-dramatized every day decisions. Any way you look at it such a question only invokes more questions, just like asking yourself if your a good person. Only you know the truth and only you know what constitutes a problem. I think anyone who will tell you " they have problems " is either looking for sympathy or legitimately needs a hug and some reassurance that the whole world isn't coming to an end ! 
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Problem –noun 1. any question or matter involving doubt, uncertainty, or difficulty. 2. a question proposed for solution or discussion. 3. Mathematics. a statement requiring a solution, usually by means of a mathematical operation or geometric construction. –adjective 4. difficult to train or guide; unruly: a problem child. 5. Literature. dealing with choices of action difficult either for an individual or for society at large: a problem play. (dictionary.com) Place your situation where it applies. If it doesn't fall under these basic categories, perhaps "problems" is a metaphor for something fictional you've created. Or even a cop-out of denial of responsibility. Everyone has unresolved issues pending in their lives. Some from the past which haven't been personally reconciled and forgiven, some in the future which are most likely speculative (like thinking out an entire argument in your head before the discussion) and those of the present which may be over-dramatized every day decisions. Any way you look at it such a question only invokes more questions, just like asking yourself if your a good person. Only you know the truth and only you know what constitutes a problem. I think anyone who will tell you " they have problems " is either looking for sympathy or legitimately needs a hug and some reassurance that the whole world isn't coming to an end ! |
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Perhaps then, a problem is a thing or situation that you personally can't or don't want to deal with.
If you have a problem and don't realize it, is it still a problem? Yes I think so. For example if you have been targeted by a serial killer and you don't know it, or if you are turning the corner on a mountain pass and and avalanche of rocks are tumbling down the mountain. I would say that those are real problems. But 90% (I estimate here) of problems that people think they have are not really immediate problems. Immediate problems are the priority. Imminent problems are also a problem but they may not be immediate. If you are just a little bit pregnant... that could be an imminent problem if you don't want to be. It can't be ignored. |
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When a debt is a problem.
When should you worry about a debt? A monthly bill arrives in the mail and I did not have enough money to pay it that month, so I tossed the statement in the trash. My sister, who was watching me, looked stunned. "Why did you do that?" she asked. I said, "Well, I can't pay that bill this month." She said "Well you still owe the bill!" I said, yes, but that's okay, they will send me another one next month. This bill was not a problem because I did not have to grapple over how I was going to pay it. I KNEW I could not pay it until next month, so why worry about it now? Had it been a disconnect notice, it would have been bumped up on the priority list.   |
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Edited by
DeKLiNe0fMaN
on
Tue 02/03/09 07:25 AM
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Perhaps then, a problem is a thing or situation that you personally can't or don't want to deal with. If you have a problem and don't realize it, is it still a problem? Yes I think so. For example if you have been targeted by a serial killer and you don't know it, or if you are turning the corner on a mountain pass and and avalanche of rocks are tumbling down the mountain. I would say that those are real problems. WTF ? speculative serial killer worries, possible avalanches? Perhaps you should just become a shut-in order psychotropic drugs online to help you cope with false fears and stay nice and safe in your dark lil' apartment with the blinds closed the T.V unplugged. Then when they find your body in an apartment filled with random defecation and a plague of anorexic cats they can say " there are worse ways to go like being crushed by falling rocks running from Dahmer" JMO
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we make our own problems which doesn't actually effect reality.
we are our own worse enemy. self destruction is what man has done since the creation |
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Edited by
Jeanniebean
on
Tue 02/03/09 08:02 AM
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Perhaps then, a problem is a thing or situation that you personally can't or don't want to deal with. If you have a problem and don't realize it, is it still a problem? Yes I think so. For example if you have been targeted by a serial killer and you don't know it, or if you are turning the corner on a mountain pass and and avalanche of rocks are tumbling down the mountain. I would say that those are real problems. WTF ? speculative serial killer worries, possible avalanches? Perhaps you should just become a shut-in order psychotropic drugs online to help you cope with false fears and stay nice and safe in your dark lil' apartment with the blinds closed the T.V unplugged. Then when they find your body in an apartment filled with random defecation and a plague of anorexic cats they can say " there are worse ways to go like being crushed by falling rocks running from Dahmer" JMO WTF?? I am not being speculative. I am defining what a real problem is. If a person really does have a serial killer stalking them and does not know about it, that is a real problem whether they know about it or not. If a person really is about to drive into an avalanche that is a real problem. So what is it that you don't understand? I am not talking about false fears. I'm talking about what is and what is not a real problem. I am also not suggesting the people become shut ins or live in a padded cell or worry about things that might happen. Duh!  This subject is simply about what constitutes a real problem. |
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 whoot whoot
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