Oh hon... that will be in less than a month. Don't unpack.

Thanks.

How am I going to say I tried everything if I don't give it my all?

Give it your all emotionally, as you have been. Actually, if you unpack it will take him less time to get complacent again.

I wish I could be more positive. I've read everything you said though... I suggest you re-read the whole thread.

my car is still packed...might be cuz I am lazy though....

I thought everything is in your name? Isn't it his car that should be packed?

If you've never had to deal with this type of problem before, I wouldn't call you pathetic, yet. If you've had to deal with this kind of problem in almost every relationship, yea, that's when it's time to put on the "I am a loser" sign.

I was wondering the same thing.

Previously she had said, "..I have a house in my name, all the bills in my name...."

I just have a house and job available somewhere else....I have the backup plan in case.

And there lies the problem "the backup plan".There should be no backup plans in a relationship it should be all or nothing.It sounds to me like a love/hate thing, his attitude towards you stinks but equally your attitude is quite immature.Maybe you both need to stay single until you have worked out what being in a loving relationship entails because I think your both way off the mark

I was saying in case he decided not to take me seriously again. I was explaining why i would be the one leaving.

Babe, do you think hes having second thoughts about your relationship. Have you spoken to him about it?

True words of wisdom...then again there are very few men left in the world that actually realize this.

Kiena, Take it from me in the long run, its really not worth the stress and wasted energy. Been there done that and quite frankly I wasted too much time and tears...In everything there is a need for balance, have you asked yourself lately what you want...I know this sounds selfish but it seems like you both are really unhappy and life is too short..

Hon, if you have a house sell it and go to college. You are far too young to have this kind of problem, and you will regret not going to college later on after you've given the best years of your life to this guy and you realize he doesn't really love you, but you now have two kids to take care of etc. etc. etc... Your leaving and returning tells him that you can be manipulated, and that you weren't serious about it. Your earlier comment that you cry a lot could also mean that you are suffering from depression. Talk to your doctor about it. You do sound like you have low self-esteem, and the one thing I know is that until you get your own life in order, you will not be ready to tackle the problems this guy has, nor will you be able to love him properly. It's not fair to either of you. At your age you should be on a voyage of self-discovery, not worrying about bills etc, travelling Europe with a backpack or something. If he is laying a guilt trip on you to keep you from doing things then he is no friend of yours. What are your dreams for you life? He should support your dreams, not bring you down, or make you feel guilty. Sit down and think about what kind of woman you want to be, and how you are going to get there. Talk to him about your dreams, and if he riducules you, or puts you down, or tries to make you think you can't do it, then you know it's time to leave. You don't need a plan just for tomorrow or next month, you need a plan for the rest of your life!

Maybe he found out you were on a dating site looking for other men...

I am NOT a cheater, thank you very much. I would leave before I would cheat...never have cheated, never will. I was on the site before I met him, stayed on for the chat forums and for the friends I had already made.

Too Old at 29. Give me a break! Snap at him! What a cry baby. He is doing it, because he finds comfort of someone trying to be nice all the time... uhh...I'm a terrible advisor..this dude has either something to hide and makes up an excuse or he needs a large kick in the A$$.

Kiena... You have done all you can... You love him... sit him down one more time.... Tell him you love him and are concerned for him... Make the point that you are trying to help... And if he doesnt want your help, you are moving on.... Having to deal with the chemical imbalance known as depression myself I know the pain it causes... Unfortunately, I didnt have someone as willing as you to try to help me... I had to figure it out myself... You have done nothing wrong so far....

I was in the exact situation you are in, but for me I stuck in there for 9 years. In the end, I was cheated on, lied to, and she attempted to commit suicide. She was and prolly is still a very nice person, but Depression can destroy lives if not taken care of properly. You need to make a call, if he is not going to seek help, are you willing to go down with the ship? appearently I was, and let me tell you, it is a horrible thing to live through, you can only watch as the person you love gets destoyed, it is traumatizing. And in most cases it only gets worse with age if not properly treated. Please don't waste 9 years of your life, I know it's hard to give up on someone you love, trust me I am the most loyal person out there, once your with me and I love you, you are family, and you don't just give up on family. But truefully, you can only help someone who wants to help themselves, and from where I see it, he needs to fix himself, not you. It's not your fault, keep reminding yourself of that. Plus the grass is greener eventualy, even if your sitting on it alone.