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Topic: Is Love Worth the Risk?
mcleaver22's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:02 AM
Ok so answer me this...is loving someone worth the risk of getting hurt? I mean really, loving is hard enough because it puts you out there in a vulnerable spot, but is it worth it when most people don't even know how to love anymore or what loving someone really is or what it takes?

Love to me is more than a feeling, more than a goofy love struck teenage goosebumps and skin tingling movement...it's an action, a commitment and an ongoing choice towards a person...

Someone once told me about a counseling session they had with a couple that wanted to get married because they were "in love". When he asked one why they wanted to marry the other, they replied, "Because she makes me feel good". He replied with, "Oh really? Well someday she is going to make you feel bad. Then what will you do?"

This statement was so true to what people think and make of love these days...it is all in how you feel at that moment, instead of the commitment and choice that love really is towards that one person you are devoted to for the rest of your life. Why are there so many divorces nowadays? Because people "fell out of love". I think that is a ******** excuse for saying, "I don't feel like loving and honoring that person anymore because it isn't getting me anything in return or because I am tired of that person or because I am lazy..." Reference to all of the "I"'s in that sentence...love is supposed to be selfless, but this world has made it into a "me" and "i" issue...

Does anyone agree with this? Has anyone else lost hope in what real love is all about? I sure have...


StevenSchwenkler's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:05 AM
Yes

newarkjw's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:06 AM

Ok so answer me this...is loving someone worth the risk of getting hurt? I mean really, loving is hard enough because it puts you out there in a vulnerable spot, but is it worth it when most people don't even know how to love anymore or what loving someone really is or what it takes?





I would like to think so............smokin

no photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:10 AM
No, I haven't lost hope. It seems as if what you're referencing isn't so much an inability to love another person as it is the preoccupation with (a) immediate gratification of wants and needs, and (2) life in a 'disposable' society. People are now seen as 'temporary' in many cases - including those in 'relationships'. People have become interchangeable with iPods, CDs, DVDs, X-boxes, or any of the thousands of other things that are 'disposed of' once they no longer work the way people want them to work. Does any of that mean I'm not going to continue to look for love in a relationship? No. I've known what a good relationship can be. I want that again. My relationship was ended by her death, not by us breaking up. I won't find her duplicate anywhere, but I know there's someone with the same qualities out there. If you can wade thru the swamp of emotional mud and look for the penny at the bottom of life's stream (boy, is that a sucky analogy or what?), it'll be worth it in the end. Good luck to you ...

Ladylid2012's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:13 AM
of course it's worth the risk

Gossipmpm's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:14 AM
Edited by Gossipmpm on Wed 04/14/10 09:26 AM
Is life worth the risk??

Risk of what???

Being hurt?- geez that's just life

love is a wonderful thing !!!:heart:

Why oh why

do we have to analyze it so??:heart:


Totage's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:25 AM

Ok so answer me this...is loving someone worth the risk of getting hurt? I mean really, loving is hard enough because it puts you out there in a vulnerable spot, but is it worth it when most people don't even know how to love anymore or what loving someone really is or what it takes?

Love to me is more than a feeling, more than a goofy love struck teenage goosebumps and skin tingling movement...it's an action, a commitment and an ongoing choice towards a person...

Someone once told me about a counseling session they had with a couple that wanted to get married because they were "in love". When he asked one why they wanted to marry the other, they replied, "Because she makes me feel good". He replied with, "Oh really? Well someday she is going to make you feel bad. Then what will you do?"

This statement was so true to what people think and make of love these days...it is all in how you feel at that moment, instead of the commitment and choice that love really is towards that one person you are devoted to for the rest of your life. Why are there so many divorces nowadays? Because people "fell out of love". I think that is a ******** excuse for saying, "I don't feel like loving and honoring that person anymore because it isn't getting me anything in return or because I am tired of that person or because I am lazy..." Reference to all of the "I"'s in that sentence...love is supposed to be selfless, but this world has made it into a "me" and "i" issue...

Does anyone agree with this? Has anyone else lost hope in what real love is all about? I sure have...




I agree. It seems that now a days it's easier to confuse lust with love. Of course love is worth the risk.

Redsoxfan1's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:30 AM
Real love is worth the risk. I never thought I'd find it again, I was ready to give up, but then I found Rob, and we love each other so much, I wouldn't trade that for anything!!:heart: smooched

no photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:31 AM
Edited by Kings_Knight on Wed 04/14/10 09:31 AM

Is life worth the risk??

Risk of what???

Being hurt?- geez that's just life

love is a wonderful thing !!!:heart:

Why oh why

do we have to analyze it so??:heart:




See? I KNEW there was a reason I liked you ...

Gossipmpm's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:31 AM
Ya know

ya reach an age (maybe some havnt yet)

when ya know the diff between lust and love

lust:

I want ya friggin body. Don't care to much for the mind entertain me with your personality but baby **** me and do it good!!!

Love:

I want your friggin body. Love your mind-your thoughts. Your personality is incredible. We don't have to **** let's cuddle awhile

it's the combo

THAT'S EXPLOSIVE!!!!!:heart:

Etrain's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:32 AM
:banana: :banana: :banana: Nope:banana: :banana: :banana:

no photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:34 AM
"no one ever knows or loves another" robert smith

no photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:48 AM
Edited by Kings_Knight on Wed 04/14/10 09:48 AM

Ya know

ya reach an age (maybe some havnt yet)

when ya know the diff between lust and love

lust:

I want ya friggin body. Don't care to much for the mind entertain me with your personality but baby **** me and do it good!!!

Love:

I want your friggin body. Love your mind-your thoughts. Your personality is incredible. We don't have to **** let's cuddle awhile

it's the combo

THAT'S EXPLOSIVE!!!!!:heart:


You GO, girl ... !

Gossipmpm's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:50 AM
Hey KK. Tried to write. But ya got a lotta limits!! Can't get through lol:heart:

silly's photo
Wed 04/14/10 09:52 AM
Yes true love is worth the risk,I was about to give up on ever finding love again,and then Mikey117 found me and I so very HAPPY that he did.We LOVE each other so very much.love love :heart: drinker :banana: :banana: :banana:

no photo
Wed 04/14/10 10:01 AM
Edited by Kings_Knight on Wed 04/14/10 10:03 AM
For you, dear lady, I shall amend said limits ...

y'know, I wouldn't do this for just anybody ... heh-heh-heh ...

It's already did ...

AndyBgood's photo
Wed 04/14/10 10:03 AM
Try this on for size. I have a rule I live by about raising my hand to a friend or family member. Imagine being in a relationship where the other provokes you so much you hit them. Is that what you want to be in? If a woman I am dating makes me so mad I lift my hand it is OVER. I will not put up with a painful or provocative relationship.

A marriage is an uber-partnership. There has to be trust and commitment as well as teamwork and understanding the differences between you and your partner. If you have to worry about being hurt in a relationship then it is not a relationship but a self indulgence to avoid loneliness. Where there is fear there is no trust and more than likely no respect either. I would be more than fuming mad if my wife got me so pissed off at her I let the Pimp Hand fly. I would more than likely divorce her over that for as small as it seems. I am a person who can take a loud and angry argument without raising my hand. People get mad at each other for time to time but the answer in a family is not smacking my wife around or dominating her. Some women need to be Dominated. I don't want that either.

Boy this is deeper than it sounds...

NEXT! There is a thing about the timid never prosper. The Meek never win. And the scared never ever grow. Pain is part of the equation. You have no idea what a person is about sight unseen. You have no clue if they are sane or absolute nut jobs. You have to take a chance sometimes with this one exception: (take note! This is really important!) If your gut hunch says the person is a dirt bag then 99.999% of the time they are! LISTEN TO YOUR GUT FEELINGS!

If you don't take chances in life though you never ever will get ahead or grow. Again though with relationships you got to be careful because they take time to mature properly. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS INSTANT GRATIFICATION!!! Believe me, every guy out there is "prince charming" and later they wind up being "King Midas" later steeped in their own greed and self indulgence. every woman wishes they were a princess swept off of their feet by some dashing and handsome prince and so many wannabe players use that to hurt women.

The other fact about life is EVERYTHING has a cost benefit to it. Love is supposed to be unconditional but really it is. That crock of Christian dogma has caused a lot of confusion over the years. Take what makes a guy SEXUALLY attractive to you and separate it from what makes a guy Intellectually attractive to you. Now look a crowd of guys over. You will easily begin to weed out the undesirables. If love were truly unconditional no matter what you would be attracted to every guy in the room (and we tend to call them Nymphos or sluts.)

Man this is a deep topic!

Fact: Love is confusing and totally misunderstood! Sometimes people get it right but more often than not we get it all wrong.

You got to know the difference between a relationship being used to fill personal voids in life (and my last few relationships were that in that I was just filling in a void for my GFs and when they found what they wanted they moved on leaving me behind). Women are more guilty of that then men. If you are in a committed relationship and in the back of your mind you want more in the relationship then your partner is providing to you (be it anything) then there is in deed something wrong with the choice you made. Example, he is not exactly attentive to you in the evening and you want to talk and that really bothers you. That is wrong. Stuff like this festers into hate later anyways.

Love can be unconditional but that purely applies to application. In practice it is totally conditional and likewise carries a price. Love can require a lot of compromise. It is blinding and confusing.

But all in all it is the greatest force in life next to death. Love has made people achieve the impossible. Love has caused war and ended it. Love can make you happy and miserable.

Above all love is chaotic! There is no order, structure, or method to it. Like God it just is!

And with that I need to dip my fingers in water to cool them off now!winking

Gossipmpm's photo
Wed 04/14/10 10:03 AM

For you, dear lady, I shall amend said limits ... y'know, I wouldn't do this for just anybody ... heh-heh-heh ...


remember I'm only 51--- a youngin. Hehe

no photo
Wed 04/14/10 10:06 AM


For you, dear lady, I shall amend said limits ... y'know, I wouldn't do this for just anybody ... heh-heh-heh ...


remember I'm only 51--- a youngin. Hehe


Dat's okay ... I think you can keep up with me ... again, heh-heh-heh (he said) ...

lilott's photo
Wed 04/14/10 10:09 AM
Not even.

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