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| Topic: Separation, divorce and how to heal | |
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I'm currently separated from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and although he was a jerk (understatement, really) I still find myself missing him during the night. I don't know why, he wasn't very loving or affectionate.. It's just hard.
Is anyone else going through this? Do you have any tips for me? |
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beat him with a stick. a really long stick. you will feel better.
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beat him with a stick. a really long stick. you will feel better. that was poetic |
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I'm currently separated from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and although he was a jerk (understatement, really) I still find myself missing him during the night. I don't know why, he wasn't very loving or affectionate.. It's just hard. Is anyone else going through this? Do you have any tips for me? when u are missing him at night (or any time) reflect on a few memories of WHY you are apart those memories will make u so freakin happy that he is gone that u will enjoy snuggling with a warm blanky.....and you'll appreciate your next hunny by your side that much more 
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beat him with a stick. a really long stick. you will feel better. that was poetic a really really REALLY big stick. I must emphasize the stick that must be used in this beating. |
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Been there and done that.....Divorce is worse than death. Death is final, divorce they take part of you with them.
Give yourself time to process all of it, yes it is natural to still think of the other person even if they were not so nice. Learning who you are now (you are not the same person anymore)and letting the process move forward you will move on in you heart and mind. It really is up to you how long you linger or they linger in your heart and mind? Best wishes to you! |
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I'm currently separated from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and although he was a jerk (understatement, really) I still find myself missing him during the night. I don't know why, he wasn't very loving or affectionate.. It's just hard. Is anyone else going through this? Do you have any tips for me? when u are missing him at night (or any time) reflect on a few memories of WHY you are apart those memories will make u so freakin happy that he is gone that u will enjoy snuggling with a warm blanky.....and you'll appreciate your next hunny by your side that much more When I do, I only feel sadder. The reasons we separated weren't good ones. It was a very bad marriage that I tried to keep together but.. yeah. I'm young, I know this, and that I have plenty of other chances to find the right person, but I'm not sure if I can handle it yet. |
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Been there and done that.....Divorce is worse than death. Death is final, divorce they take part of you with them. Give yourself time to process all of it, yes it is natural to still think of the other person even if they were not so nice. Learning who you are now (you are not the same person anymore)and letting the process move forward you will move on in you heart and mind. It really is up to you how long you linger or they linger in your heart and mind? Best wishes to you! If someone dies is that considered divorce from their life? |
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Been there and done that.....Divorce is worse than death. Death is final, divorce they take part of you with them. Give yourself time to process all of it, yes it is natural to still think of the other person even if they were not so nice. Learning who you are now (you are not the same person anymore)and letting the process move forward you will move on in you heart and mind. It really is up to you how long you linger or they linger in your heart and mind? Best wishes to you! Thank you. You are right, that they take a piece of you with them. Sigh. Depressing topic. :( |
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. . . I still find myself missing him during the night. . . amaeb22, what you are feeling is similar what I felt after my wife died. You sense an emptiness in your life, and it hurts. The healing process takes time. It helps if you can express your feelings in a safe setting. That is why I started visiting Mingle2. |
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I'm currently separated from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and although he was a jerk (understatement, really) I still find myself missing him during the night. I don't know why, he wasn't very loving or affectionate.. It's just hard. Is anyone else going through this? Do you have any tips for me? I am currently going through this, me and my ex separated only weeks ago. Normally moving on would be easier, but since we have children we are always in contact and seeing each other. She has issues staying faithful and is already seeing someone else, well she has been seeing him for months. I fail and we end up being intimate, and that makes things worse but I feel like crap with out those moments of happiness. we don't choose who we love and even though a person can be a bad partner and parent does not me we love them less. It ok to have feelings for them and you seem to know whats best for you. Things will get easier with time and there will always be memories of those good times that that bring up unwanted feelings. just know that where you are is better then where you were, and work on making you and you're kids happy. |
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I'm currently separated from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and although he was a jerk (understatement, really) I still find myself missing him during the night. I don't know why, he wasn't very loving or affectionate.. It's just hard. Is anyone else going through this? Do you have any tips for me? when u are missing him at night (or any time) reflect on a few memories of WHY you are apart those memories will make u so freakin happy that he is gone that u will enjoy snuggling with a warm blanky.....and you'll appreciate your next hunny by your side that much more When I do, I only feel sadder. The reasons we separated weren't good ones. It was a very bad marriage that I tried to keep together but.. yeah. I'm young, I know this, and that I have plenty of other chances to find the right person, but I'm not sure if I can handle it yet. then focus on how awesome the moonlight is. o no i hear honking. i might need to step outside and handle something. hmmm. nope they stopped yelling. in all honesty though! the best way is to lose yourself in something else. such as! drawing cooking etc. find what makes you happy and devote more time to it so you dont have that spare time to think about depression or agitation. ^.^ |
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. . . I still find myself missing him during the night. . . amaeb22, what you are feeling is similar what I felt after my wife died. You sense an emptiness in your life, and it hurts. The healing process takes time. It helps if you can express your feelings in a safe setting. That is why I started visiting Mingle2. There are a lot of negative emotions between my ex and I, though. He has already moved on and it's only been one month. We're not even legally divorced yet. I can't say I'm any better, I joined this site. Sigh. We became the opposite of what we both wanted in the end. |
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I'm currently separated from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and although he was a jerk (understatement, really) I still find myself missing him during the night. I don't know why, he wasn't very loving or affectionate.. It's just hard. Is anyone else going through this? Do you have any tips for me? I am currently going through this, me and my ex separated only weeks ago. Normally moving on would be easier, but since we have children we are always in contact and seeing each other. She has issues staying faithful and is already seeing someone else, well she has been seeing him for months. I fail and we end up being intimate, and that makes things worse but I feel like crap with out those moments of happiness. we don't choose who we love and even though a person can be a bad partner and parent does not me we love them less. It ok to have feelings for them and you seem to know whats best for you. Things will get easier with time and there will always be memories of those good times that that bring up unwanted feelings. just know that where you are is better then where you were, and work on making you and you're kids happy. I'm sorry that she has that hold over you still, but even though I miss my ex, and you miss your's, doesn't mean we stoop to their level and give in. It's painful and lonely, but there are brighter things to life. You have your kids. Hold onto them like I hold onto my son. Be happy you're not homeless, or experienced anything worse. My husband cheated on me the last year of our marriage but since we had a child, I wanted things to work out for our son. Things escalated into violence and again, here I am: sitting at the table with all sorts of legal work to file. It hurts, and it probably will for a while, but we have to stay positive. |
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I'm currently separated from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and although he was a jerk (understatement, really) I still find myself missing him during the night. I don't know why, he wasn't very loving or affectionate.. It's just hard. Is anyone else going through this? Do you have any tips for me? Marriage is an institution and you were institutionalized. I have encountered being institutionalized twice to the same woman; Rehab and then to my wife who passed away. One can actually miss even the antagonist and the protagonist as well. One has to relearn how to be single again especially if one feels that they were like born married. Being single after being married I have found is a new type of single whether through divorce or becoming a widow or widower. It is a good time to make a lot of friends. That way you can have backup friends. Especially, if like me, you wear them out. That way you can recharge your batteries for being single. It is like taking baby steps. You will find that you will eventually even like being alone at times. 
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I'm currently separated from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and although he was a jerk (understatement, really) I still find myself missing him during the night. I don't know why, he wasn't very loving or affectionate.. It's just hard. Is anyone else going through this? Do you have any tips for me? when u are missing him at night (or any time) reflect on a few memories of WHY you are apart those memories will make u so freakin happy that he is gone that u will enjoy snuggling with a warm blanky.....and you'll appreciate your next hunny by your side that much more When I do, I only feel sadder. The reasons we separated weren't good ones. It was a very bad marriage that I tried to keep together but.. yeah. I'm young, I know this, and that I have plenty of other chances to find the right person, but I'm not sure if I can handle it yet. I know u will feel sadder but you will also understand within yourself why u are better off right now alone at night for right now. Don't worry about being able to "handel" stuff - just - well, if you find something or someone and it makes u happy - I don;t see a problem there, but that's just me catch whatever happiness is out there right now I did that after my divorce and it made some nice memories, a few good friends, and kept me alive - literally...good luck! |
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beat him with a stick. a really long stick. you will feel better. that was poetic a really really REALLY big stick. I must emphasize the stick that must be used in this beating. 
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I'm currently separated from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and although he was a jerk (understatement, really) I still find myself missing him during the night. I don't know why, he wasn't very loving or affectionate.. It's just hard. Is anyone else going through this? Do you have any tips for me? I am currently going through this, me and my ex separated only weeks ago. Normally moving on would be easier, but since we have children we are always in contact and seeing each other. She has issues staying faithful and is already seeing someone else, well she has been seeing him for months. I fail and we end up being intimate, and that makes things worse but I feel like crap with out those moments of happiness. we don't choose who we love and even though a person can be a bad partner and parent does not me we love them less. It ok to have feelings for them and you seem to know whats best for you. Things will get easier with time and there will always be memories of those good times that that bring up unwanted feelings. just know that where you are is better then where you were, and work on making you and you're kids happy. I'm sorry that she has that hold over you still, but even though I miss my ex, and you miss your's, doesn't mean we stoop to their level and give in. It's painful and lonely, but there are brighter things to life. You have your kids. Hold onto them like I hold onto my son. Be happy you're not homeless, or experienced anything worse. My husband cheated on me the last year of our marriage but since we had a child, I wanted things to work out for our son. Things escalated into violence and again, here I am: sitting at the table with all sorts of legal work to file. It hurts, and it probably will for a while, but we have to stay positive. You sound like a very strong women with a good head on her shoulders, things will be brighter and you're right it's the kids that are important, took a long time to realize that being together for them was not best for them. We made a good move by coming here though, as we do deserve to find our happiness. |
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beat him with a stick. a really long stick. you will feel better. that was poetic a really really REALLY big stick. I must emphasize the stick that must be used in this beating. then. you should take that stick and insert it up *censored* =) |
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I'm currently separated from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, and although he was a jerk (understatement, really) I still find myself missing him during the night. I don't know why, he wasn't very loving or affectionate.. It's just hard. Is anyone else going through this? Do you have any tips for me? when u are missing him at night (or any time) reflect on a few memories of WHY you are apart those memories will make u so freakin happy that he is gone that u will enjoy snuggling with a warm blanky.....and you'll appreciate your next hunny by your side that much more When I do, I only feel sadder. The reasons we separated weren't good ones. It was a very bad marriage that I tried to keep together but.. yeah. I'm young, I know this, and that I have plenty of other chances to find the right person, but I'm not sure if I can handle it yet. I know u will feel sadder but you will also understand within yourself why u are better off right now alone at night for right now. Don't worry about being able to "handel" stuff - just - well, if you find something or someone and it makes u happy - I don;t see a problem there, but that's just me catch whatever happiness is out there right now I did that after my divorce and it made some nice memories, a few good friends, and kept me alive - literally...good luck! I still have to wait for my actual divorce. Uhg, I want everything to be over so I can move on peacefully. He's the type of person who tears up anyone who sullies his name or life. I understand why we're getting divorced, I do, but I've never been with anyone as long as him. I think that's what hurts the most; how much time and effort and tears I put into that relationship only to have it crumble. I deserve better, I know I do. |
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