Topic: One for the ladies....
LibraCass89's photo
Mon 06/04/12 12:51 AM
If a woman is dumbing herself down for a guy, then she can't be that smart. Which means she isn't actually dumbing herself down, but rather being herself...think about that one! xD


But seriously, I was just thinking about this. I don't understand why any woman would do that. If a guy isn't intelligent, it's one of the biggest turn offs for me and I don't even want him anymore to worry about pretending to be something I'm not.
Don't get me wrong, he doesn't need to be a rocket surgeon ( :wink: ) and we don't need to talk about string theory on the first date (although that would be amusing) but when a dude's a total tool, he isn't even deserving of our intelligence and beauty. Am I right, ladies?

Kahurangi's photo
Mon 06/04/12 02:37 AM

If a woman is dumbing herself down for a guy, then she can't be that smart. Which means she isn't actually dumbing herself down, but rather being herself...think about that one! xD



I wonder if being submissive is the same as dumbing down? Who knows??..i'm just glad we are all different :smile:

wux's photo
Mon 06/04/12 03:00 PM

I'm curious to know if educated ladies do the "dumb down" if the object of their desire pulls up short in the smarts department? :smile:


I think in my own case they have to dumb up.

wux's photo
Mon 06/04/12 03:04 PM

If a woman is dumbing herself down for a guy, then she can't be that smart. Which means she isn't actually dumbing herself down, but rather being herself...think about that one! xD


But seriously, I was just thinking about this. I don't understand why any woman would do that. If a guy isn't intelligent, it's one of the biggest turn offs for me and I don't even want him anymore to worry about pretending to be something I'm not.
Don't get me wrong, he doesn't need to be a rocket surgeon ( :wink: ) and we don't need to talk about string theory on the first date (although that would be amusing) but when a dude's a total tool, he isn't even deserving of our intelligence and beauty. Am I right, ladies?


As far as I am concerned, -- although I am not that concerned at all about this -- the string theory can be summed up in one sentence: a string will always have two ends, even if you tie a knot in the middle.

Some empirical evidence exists that suggests that the theory is valid.


wux's photo
Mon 06/04/12 03:07 PM


If a woman is dumbing herself down for a guy, then she can't be that smart. Which means she isn't actually dumbing herself down, but rather being herself...think about that one! xD



I wonder if being submissive is the same as dumbing down? Who knows??..i'm just glad we are all different :smile:


If a submissive ties a five hundred lbs dumbbell to her own neck by order of the DOM, and therefore she can't get up, then in that case being submissive is the same as dumbing the self down.

wux's photo
Mon 06/04/12 03:09 PM
Edited by wux on Mon 06/04/12 03:10 PM


i'm just glad we are all different :smile:


I sometimes wish that some people would not be so different.

If that became reality, the world would become different.

delilady's photo
Mon 06/04/12 03:42 PM
No I don't dumb down. I worked hard for my education and I love a good discussion. At the same time, I don't try to make others feel like I am more intelligent than they are.

wux's photo
Tue 06/05/12 07:58 AM

No I don't dumb down. I worked hard for my education and I love a good discussion. At the same time, I don't try to make others feel like I am more intelligent than they are.


My problem is that I am not quite as intelligent as I seem; people take me for much more than what i am.

I found that the bestests and most surefirestes way to sound intelligent is to avoid sloppy references in your written speech.

For instance, "I don't mind speaking to people with any number of speech impediments, but I don't like to listen to them."

The mistake in this example is not too bad, but the "them" is imprecise, for it could be referring back to people or else back to impediments.

If you learn how to use good grammar, good spelling, and clear composition, that's being halfway there. The next and only step after that is to clear up the awkward constructs, the ambiguities, and the sloppy referencing, and bang, you'll gain ten IQ points in the least above your current one.

msharmony's photo
Tue 06/05/12 08:00 AM


If a woman is dumbing herself down for a guy, then she can't be that smart. Which means she isn't actually dumbing herself down, but rather being herself...think about that one! xD



I wonder if being submissive is the same as dumbing down? Who knows??..i'm just glad we are all different :smile:



I think it depends upon how intelligent the partner is. I think sometimes people fight authority for the sake of fighting. If, for instance, I had a doctor in my home I would probably 'submit' to his instructions when it came to medical issues because I trust his intellect, experience, and intentions.

Likewise with a spouse, trusting someone enough to 'submit' is not really tied to intelligence.

wux's photo
Tue 06/05/12 08:07 AM
Edited by wux on Tue 06/05/12 08:09 AM
Just in: breaking news in scientific research in string theory!!

Dr. Abelard and associates at the Massachussetts Institute of Technology can't spell their own Institute's name properly. But the news is not actually that, it's something different.

According to Dr. Abelard, a string can have four ends, or six, or eight.

His proof involves the technique of "thought experiment." Imagine a string in front of you, lying on the table. It has two ends and perhaps even a knot.

Now pick up the string, and cut it into two with a pair of scissors.

You will have four ends in front of you now.

Pickup one the two pieces, and cut IT into two. You will have six ends.

Critics tried to debunk this new angle in string theory, saying that if you cut a string, you will get two strings. Protagonists of the theory support it with saying that although the original string is in two separate pieces, nothing has been taken away from it and nothing has been added to it, only its structure has been transformed. Since it is the same string as before the cut, the string is the original string, now matter how many pieces you cut it up into, and therefore the growing number of ends will still be ends of the same string.

Much like if you take a string of hair from a person's scalp, and yank it out, you don't change from "Martha" or "Abigail", or whomever the scalp is a part of, to something else.

galendgirl's photo
Tue 06/05/12 08:11 PM

I'm curious to know if educated ladies do the "dumb down" if the object of their desire pulls up short in the smarts department? :smile:


I recently found out that I "dumb down" when I feel inferior in smarts department.Doing that really WAS "dumb."

Kahurangi's photo
Wed 06/06/12 02:22 AM
I maybe going off on a tangent here, as i am prone to do, but i don't consider measuring smarts by the education one receives. I have seen professional couples do dumb things, namely the female in said relationship allowing her partner to be over bearing by talking down to her in mixed company. Having said that, i've also seen it done by women also.

Now that was dumb of me to go and open that can of worms. Ha!...why would i need anybody else to put me down or beat me up when i can do a far better job of it? :smile:

josie68's photo
Wed 06/06/12 04:00 AM
I have acted dumb or nieve about things many times if it suited me.

Most of the men I grew up with really where not interested in how bright I was, but they seemed to like being needed. So that's what they got.:wink:

wux's photo
Wed 06/06/12 07:15 PM

I maybe going off on a tangent here, as i am prone to do, but i don't consider measuring smarts by the education one receives. I have seen professional couples do dumb things, namely the female in said relationship allowing her partner to be over bearing by talking down to her in mixed company. Having said that, i've also seen it done by women also.

Now that was dumb of me to go and open that can of worms. Ha!...why would i need anybody else to put me down or beat me up when i can do a far better job of it? :smile:


Sometimes the slap is not as painful as the sound it makes would indicate.

I think you are a sensitive soul, kahu, and your intellect camouflages it and in the end your over-sensitivity triumphs in interpreting the raw data of interpersonal behaviour in which you are involved.

I am somewhat similar; I can't accept into me the compliments given by others, or their apparent respect or likign for me, when it happens. I dismiss those positive social feeds automatically. So I am sensitive coz I only hear the blame and the put-downs. I am not alone in this, many forum users are similar. I've seen my share of a pretty or handsome new member asking for support, which others give him or her on the forums, and perhaps one guy will butt them down for it, and that's the only post they reply to, coz that's the only post they see.

I still haven't learned how to properly pick up good vibes from others; that's why I am a forum attention hoorie.

I sense you are a bit different in this; it's not your perception that is skewed or unclear, but the askence nuggets you put out which asks people to put you in a role. You don't want to play that role, and you rebel via your sensitivity.

Case in point is your intellect; when someone treats you through that of your reception channels, you get deeply hurt why they don't show more warmth and love or support, whatever you want to call it. Well, people assume you are tough, because you are quick witted, and they hope to dumb up themselves in their dealings with you. They show their brilliance or genius, and those are always like a toccata and fugue; no feelings, only bravado and skill and techniqe. Then you get hurt because the parts of the symphony of interactions lack enough empathy for your needs.

I don't know how you could remedy this. If I knew, I'd have already remedied myself. Mostly the new thought in therapy is that nothing works. The patient either gets better, or worse, or stays the same, but they therapy plays no role in that. The therapist and the patient play a huge role, however, in making the therapist have a steady and somwhat high income.

galendgirl's photo
Wed 06/06/12 07:19 PM

I maybe going off on a tangent here, as i am prone to do, but i don't consider measuring smarts by the education one receives. I have seen professional couples do dumb things, namely the female in said relationship allowing her partner to be over bearing by talking down to her in mixed company. Having said that, i've also seen it done by women also.

Now that was dumb of me to go and open that can of worms. Ha!...why would i need anybody else to put me down or beat me up when i can do a far better job of it? :smile:


I know lots of brilliant people with no degree and lots of degree holders who can't manage much at all...

wux's photo
Wed 06/06/12 07:20 PM

I have acted dumb or nieve about things many times if it suited me.

Most of the men I grew up with really where not interested in how bright I was, but they seemed to like being needed. So that's what they got.:wink:

because you also needed something from them, and you placed your bets.

This is what I admire about people. their diverse way of arranging their lives, normally in a micro-managed way. I could never do that. I feel disadvantaged because of my own perceptin how I lack entitletement to shape my own destiny.

josie68's photo
Thu 06/07/12 12:12 AM


I have acted dumb or nieve about things many times if it suited me.

Most of the men I grew up with really where not interested in how bright I was, but they seemed to like being needed. So that's what they got.:wink:

because you also needed something from them, and you placed your bets.

This is what I admire about people. their diverse way of arranging their lives, normally in a micro-managed way. I could never do that. I feel disadvantaged because of my own perceptin how I lack entitletement to shape my own destiny.


rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl
Yes definately.
I learnt early to easily swap from helpless to capable.
I am still no different, I am a busines women when I need to be and the rest of the time, I am whatever i want to be.:wink:

Kahurangi's photo
Fri 06/08/12 03:06 AM


I maybe going off on a tangent here, as i am prone to do, but i don't consider measuring smarts by the education one receives. I have seen professional couples do dumb things, namely the female in said relationship allowing her partner to be over bearing by talking down to her in mixed company. Having said that, i've also seen it done by women also.

Now that was dumb of me to go and open that can of worms. Ha!...why would i need anybody else to put me down or beat me up when i can do a far better job of it? :smile:


Sometimes the slap is not as painful as the sound it makes would indicate.

I think you are a sensitive soul, kahu, and your intellect camouflages it and in the end your over-sensitivity triumphs in interpreting the raw data of interpersonal behaviour in which you are involved.

I am somewhat similar; I can't accept into me the compliments given by others, or their apparent respect or likign for me, when it happens. I dismiss those positive social feeds automatically. So I am sensitive coz I only hear the blame and the put-downs. I am not alone in this, many forum users are similar. I've seen my share of a pretty or handsome new member asking for support, which others give him or her on the forums, and perhaps one guy will butt them down for it, and that's the only post they reply to, coz that's the only post they see.

I still haven't learned how to properly pick up good vibes from others; that's why I am a forum attention hoorie.

I sense you are a bit different in this; it's not your perception that is skewed or unclear, but the askence nuggets you put out which asks people to put you in a role. You don't want to play that role, and you rebel via your sensitivity.

Case in point is your intellect; when someone treats you through that of your reception channels, you get deeply hurt why they don't show more warmth and love or support, whatever you want to call it. Well, people assume you are tough, because you are quick witted, and they hope to dumb up themselves in their dealings with you. They show their brilliance or genius, and those are always like a toccata and fugue; no feelings, only bravado and skill and techniqe. Then you get hurt because the parts of the symphony of interactions lack enough empathy for your needs.

I don't know how you could remedy this. If I knew, I'd have already remedied myself. Mostly the new thought in therapy is that nothing works. The patient either gets better, or worse, or stays the same, but they therapy plays no role in that. The therapist and the patient play a huge role, however, in making the therapist have a steady and somwhat high income.


Oh my...i didn't realise i cared so much!...yay for me :smile:

Lemme guess...yum cha? :wink:

Kahurangi's photo
Fri 06/08/12 04:55 AM
Edited by Kahurangi on Fri 06/08/12 05:17 AM


I maybe going off on a tangent here, as i am prone to do, but i don't consider measuring smarts by the education one receives. I have seen professional couples do dumb things, namely the female in said relationship allowing her partner to be over bearing by talking down to her in mixed company. Having said that, i've also seen it done by women also.

Now that was dumb of me to go and open that can of worms. Ha!...why would i need anybody else to put me down or beat me up when i can do a far better job of it? :smile:


Sometimes the slap is not as painful as the sound it makes would indicate.

I think you are a sensitive soul, kahu, and your intellect camouflages it and in the end your over-sensitivity triumphs in interpreting the raw data of interpersonal behaviour in which you are involved.

I am somewhat similar; I can't accept into me the compliments given by others, or their apparent respect or likign for me, when it happens. I dismiss those positive social feeds automatically. So I am sensitive coz I only hear the blame and the put-downs. I am not alone in this, many forum users are similar. I've seen my share of a pretty or handsome new member asking for support, which others give him or her on the forums, and perhaps one guy will butt them down for it, and that's the only post they reply to, coz that's the only post they see.

I still haven't learned how to properly pick up good vibes from others; that's why I am a forum attention hoorie.

I sense you are a bit different in this; it's not your perception that is skewed or unclear, but the askence nuggets you put out which asks people to put you in a role. You don't want to play that role, and you rebel via your sensitivity.

Case in point is your intellect; when someone treats you through that of your reception channels, you get deeply hurt why they don't show more warmth and love or support, whatever you want to call it. Well, people assume you are tough, because you are quick witted, and they hope to dumb up themselves in their dealings with you. They show their brilliance or genius, and those are always like a toccata and fugue; no feelings, only bravado and skill and techniqe. Then you get hurt because the parts of the symphony of interactions lack enough empathy for your needs.

I don't know how you could remedy this. If I knew, I'd have already remedied myself. Mostly the new thought in therapy is that nothing works. The patient either gets better, or worse, or stays the same, but they therapy plays no role in that. The therapist and the patient play a huge role, however, in making the therapist have a steady and somwhat high income.


Oh alright then, if you must...although i don't know how this got to be about me spock

Yes i am sensitive to the point of friggen tears of mirth when people ASSume that i am something that i'm not. I find it highly entertaining to see how quickly one is shoved in a pidgeon hole.

Seriously...you thought i was a man Wux??...lmao @ that one! I don't know what you've been mixing it up with there champ, but it certainly isn't kosha now is it?

Ohhhhhh...i get it. You were waiting for me to flash my girly bits at you to prove i am female weren't you? Shucky darn @ silly me :smile:

Edit because only 1 friggen friggen will do

josie68's photo
Fri 06/08/12 06:10 PM

If a woman is dumbing herself down for a guy, then she can't be that smart. Which means she isn't actually dumbing herself down, but rather being herself...think about that one! xD


But seriously, I was just thinking about this. I don't understand why any woman would do that. If a guy isn't intelligent, it's one of the biggest turn offs for me and I don't even want him anymore to worry about pretending to be something I'm not.
Don't get me wrong, he doesn't need to be a rocket surgeon ( :wink: ) and we don't need to talk about string theory on the first date (although that would be amusing) but when a dude's a total tool, he isn't even deserving of our intelligence and beauty. Am I right, ladies?


I really don't think it's any different to dressing differently for an interview.
There are times when we act accordingly to make people more comfortable until they know us or until we have relaxed enough to trust someone.
Saying that someone isn't smart because of it is not that smart either, it's just a personal opinion.