care to comment???

Can you clarify your question...

yeah i am lost on that one as well

What was the question

.... stopped feeling her

alright .. what I meant was when a guy in a relationship grows out of love with his girlfriend ( stop feeling her) does it mean the the guy is cheating???

how would we know.

you answered your que with that statement
does in mean you are cheating , cheating would mean that you have someone else when you have her
so let her know your feelings and fix it and/or move along

Well the only one that can answer this is "You the Guy"... I am not there I don't know what you are doing..
But if you don't care for the lady cut bait and let her find someone that deserves her.

IF you step out on her then yes it is cheating

guys you see am not cheating will never but nags a lot about almost everything.. I told her that this will cost us what we have.. and now it happened and now am the cheating boyfriend. and now it seems its everybody point of view huh.

The topic was

must i be cheating when i stop feeling my babe..??

Sounding like poking someone else would ease your conscious and forget about your babe.
Now you have two ladies that be nagging at you in a minute.
Smooth move! When does your cheaters episode air?

Edited for off-topic.

soufie
Site Moderator

IMO only if you are choosing to try and hide your feelings and behavior from them because you're scared of the consequences.
To me that's "cheating."


Sometimes it's a self fulfilling prophecy.

If you "grow out of love" your behavior is going to change.
Especially your indirect communication.
People tend to abhor change and are sensitive to it.

So, if your behavior changes, less subtle loving gestures, less standing as close as possible, staying late at work and seeming uninterested in coming home, less sweetness in the voice, no matter how innocuous the change seems the other person will pick it up.
Maybe without even realizing it.

But it will cause stress. On some level it will tell them "something's changed. Something's wrong." Unless people figure it out and handle it directly, it causes growing anxiety, and a need to attribute it to something (they're cheating) bad since they're more and more feeling bad, as it grows it needs an outlet, a scapegoat, a cause to identify it and thereby control it.

People respond negatively to stress and anxiety.
Becoming naggy, and mean, and all sorts of different degrees of nasty and petty.


Of course it could also be something's going on with her that she's not being honest with or about, causing stress and anxiety, causing naggyness, and making you "grow out of love" with her.

Chicken or the egg argument, really.

So

This is why direct, honest, communication in the relationship is important.
No matter what happens, ultimately you can't hide anything you do from your partner.
Simply because your indirect behavior won't allow you to.
The more time you take to address it, the more it's going to fester and grow and rip your relationship apart.

2 questions:

1. Are you still with your gf who've you lost feeling for?

2. Are you now, or have ever been with a other girl during the course of your relationship?

The bigger question is :

How does ones English and grammar change so drastically?

No I don't think it means your cheating maybe just feeling a little guilty or sad that it is ending. I have been there before and to be honest it hurts.