Would like to hear your opinion about this...

I'm 40 years old and keep getting a lot of friend requests from young boys in their 20's and from older men, almost the same age as my father. Do you consider it as a normal? What kind of interest could be to interact with people in so different age?

OK, maybe as a friends we could do some chit-chat if I would be that kind of person who cares about it... so maybe I would understand friend request...but matching thing...just crazy.

I personally will chat to anyone from any country and any age providing they understand the rules

Maybe they are sending friend requests as they are unable to message u as ur age settings are between 0 and 0 so they are prevented from messaging u (Feel free to message me sometime)

Yes, I set it with reason. I have my friends here whom I interact with and they can message me any time. But that wasn't the question...

I get them as well. Personally, I don't accept friend requests unless I have met them here first in the forums. I don't know for sure why they want to be friends before you even chatted, but I have speculations. The younger guys are most likely looking for cougars, or a maternal connection. The ones old enough to be your father are probably trying to feel young again, nothing really wrong with that, I suppose! But mostly, I suspect a lot of them are scammers. I mostly check the ones that message me, haven't check the ones that send friend requests.

And then there's the let's imagine we are popular thing. Like on Facebook, where you have thousands of friends that you don't know, haven't chatted with and probably never will

But, if I met them here and it were just a friendship thing, then I don't see anything wrong with it. Chatting with people from all over the world, regardless of age, is pretty cool.

Sounds like its not just females that Scam on here i have met plenty of them on here

Yes.

I consider it normal because Im 41, and the exact thing happens to me !

It used to annoy the hell out of me, but Im looking at it in a different way now.

Everyone is excercising their right to pursue whoever they are attracted to , regardless of whether other people approve of that attraction or not.

And simultaneously we all have the right to reject the advances of our suitors , whether our suitors approve of that decision or not.

Its really a beautiful balance if you think about it.

As for the matching issue, it's not as crazy as you think.

Years ago I fell deeply in love with a younger man who was very introspective , highly articulate , feisty, charasmatic and kind-hearted. It only lasted for 6 months because we had incompatible life goals, but it has actually been my best relationship to date.

I also have a relative who fell in love with a 70 year old man when she was 30. And she was financially independent with a father who loved her so it was definitely not a gold digger scenario or a girl with daddy issues.

Im pretty sure at his age they weren't hitting the clubs or hiking together but she fell in love with his charm and his mind because she herself is very artistic and intellectual. Their relationship also didnt last but they enjoyed their time together,


My point is this.... Relationshps like that with sharp incompatibilities in age, culture, geographical distances, or life goals, often times do not work out in the longterm , but for whatever time they last, they can be refreshing and life changing in a beautiful way.

Some may deem it a waste of time because they are often only temporary , but some people would rather have a few mpnths or years of deep authentic connection ,than decades with someone they deem a safe and sensible choice, but who doesn't touch them at their CORE.

And to me there is nothing wrong with either choice, It's just about pursuing what personally makes you happy or comfortable and hopefully finding someone who wants what you do, for however long it lasts.

Well, there is a lot of horny bastards out there ;)

I do agree that your age is just a number but when guys twice your age start hitting on you it's a bit creepy

I must agree with you.

I also get lots of friend requests from young members, which in my case everyone as I am older than Methuselah. I only accept friend requests from fellow regular forum posters, but even that I had a couple of regrets.

Have a wonderful day, sip

I just went to change the age I prefer...
lots of to old and young as you say ...


but not for dating ... I am not a cougar ... nor do I want anyone as old as my father was ... as you say chat but nothing more... I would be interested in ...

I feel attractions develop from our interactions and experiences and we learn to correlate certain attributes with love and happiness,,,,

for some, that happens with a certain age range so they seek it out

I personally have dated younger and older, and like race, I realized that the differences in the individuals are not in any way determined in stone by these factors,,,


but for me, I do realize there is more LIKELIHOOD of age relating to life experiences so I am not interested in kicking up with someone who hasnt know what it is to be divorced or be a parent,, because thats where I am at in my life at this point,,,,and I do not want a potential stepparent for my oldest who isnt at least old enough to have biologically fathered him

so my age range is determined by my personal circumstances, with my sons age and my life experience

My first relationship was disappointed. He was my age met and now I want someone older than me even by far because I think those men are understanding.

Younger womens,

Seriously, if someone older or younger than you like sending you a "friend" request bothers you, just say no. And move on with life.

Well, I will. But I'm also trying to understand.

I would suggest by setting your profile filters to the specific age group you are interested in and state exactly what you are looking for in your profile, hopefully this should reduce the number of friend requests you receive from those outside your requested age group.

Regarding what is "Normal", in society there are formula, which gives "societies" acceptable age differences, and for someone your age this gives a normal age range for dating as between 27 and 66 years of age.

Formula : Half Your Age Plus Seven Rule also known as "Standard creepiness rule"

Younger= Age / 2.0 + 7.0
Older= (Age - 7.0) * 2

see website below:-

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Half-age-plus-seven-relationship-rule.svg

It is not about my personal preferences. I can always delete messages and decline friend requests.

The questions was, what leads those men? Why 20 year old boys try to match with women twice older? Or what men in age of my father are looking for? They are probably raising their grand-children already.

+/- 5 or 10 years is OK by me. But c'mon, I have 22 years old son and I'm really not interested seeing anybody of his age.

there are a lot of men my age or older who convince themselves that they got a shot with an attractive young woman

now would they approach you in real life? I doubt it
but this the interenet
so they send whatever they want