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Topic: violence
madamx7316's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:05 PM
has anyone ever been in a violent relationship? if so, did you find it hard to trust or date again?

azrae1l's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:06 PM
yep and nope. she really couldn't hurt me although she tried a few times and not everybody acts like that either.

madamx7316's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:07 PM
i agree that not everyone acts like that. but what happens when the person you never expected to do it does, then it makes you leary of everyone...im rambling, not sure if im making sense...perhaps ill let you all answer lol

no photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:08 PM
i do not play them stupid games............

sum14u2c's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:14 PM
yep, my oldest datghter's father beat the he** outa me when i was 5mos pregnant w/ her...then wondered why i refused to marry him...the physical part heels alot quicker than the emotional but that's what shrinks are for

madamx7316's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:15 PM
yeah...im not too into shrinks either...love when they sit there and say "i understand" lmao do ya really? hahaha and this happened to you when? lmao oh here's your check

Jill298's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:17 PM

i agree that not everyone acts like that. but what happens when the person you never expected to do it does, then it makes you leary of everyone...im rambling, not sure if im making sense...perhaps ill let you all answer lol
perhaps looking back on it... do you now see any red flags that you had missed before? hindsight is always 20/20

cutelildevilsmom's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:19 PM
Edited by cutelildevilsmom on Sat 01/05/08 11:20 PM

Yes in my 20s.I did find it hard to trust not men but myself.I mean I didnt trust myself to make the right choices or to see red flags.It took me 11 yrs to marry again and I still got a dud.
oh well.laugh

Enya's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:19 PM
well,this can be a serious matter.
I know we try to stay on the 'happy' side in
these forums...but,sometimes we need a little advice.

Well,I've been there madamx.
So,if you want to know more about what I did...just
leave me a message.

(just to keep this forum fun)

madamx7316's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:21 PM
its actually not fun ... its a real problem not just for me but for men and woman out there who deal with this. i was serious when i asked and hopefully can get some insight to how others dealt with it.

Sweet_Lea_Evil's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:21 PM
it is indeed a scary situation. and yes, the physical scars heal rather quickly. the emotional scars take much longer to heal. It takes a strong will to trust again. But it CAN be done! I am living proof! A guy I was dating nearly beat me to death, literally. I never thought in a million years that he could or would do something like that. I was freaking out at every bump in the night for years afterwards. It took alot of faith, hope and belief in myself to get back out there. I am a much stronger woman now than I ever was before. (not to mention outspoken! LOL) So I've got your back! Need me, just holla!

sum14u2c's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:22 PM
it took me awhile to find a good one but when i did it was worth the search....six months later i felt like a new person....if you keep it all inside they win

Sweet_Lea_Evil's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:23 PM
Edited by Sweet_Lea_Evil on Sat 01/05/08 11:23 PM

it took me awhile to find a good one but when i did it was worth the search....six months later i felt like a new person....if you keep it all inside they win


AMEN! on the keeping it inside

madamx7316's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:25 PM
im trying to let go of the bitterness and forgive. not for him, for me. if i dont, he wins, he still has control over my heart. its been a real issue for me especially with me trying to get back out into the dating scene...guess thats why i asked for support on the matter.

no photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:25 PM
Yes..........in my early 20s......I left him while he was at work........total fear......he came home early because he knew something was up.....cops were involved.......had to move to another town.....unlisted phone number.......always scared.....

Now...if there is even a hint of violence Im out the door.....no second chances!!noway noway noway


madamx7316's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:25 PM
i feel a bit silly...ive never opened up on here in the forums to talk about a personal issue...thanks for being so great about it

Sweet_Lea_Evil's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:34 PM
feel free to email me anytime you need to ok?

madamx7316's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:35 PM
thanks sweet, nice to know im not alone...thanks to you all! its not an easy topic to discuss

Jill298's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:35 PM

i feel a bit silly...ive never opened up on here in the forums to talk about a personal issue...thanks for being so great about it
you should never feel silly when you are the victim of anything.

sum14u2c's photo
Sat 01/05/08 11:37 PM
madamx, please don't feel silly....that's what friends are for & by opening up about it you progressed the heeling process a bit......flowerforyou :heart:

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