They say it is a power thing

So let me ask you something.
Do you feel powerful?
Did you feel power when you held her life in your hands?

When your fist smashed against her pretty little face that first time, did you get stronger?
What about the second and third?
When you punched your way past ten, did you feel like a god?
When her nose shattered was it a relief to your hand and wrist?
Was it like the crumple zones on a car that are built in to absorb shock?
Did she feel your power?
Did she have to?

As her blood poured out of her mouth, nose, cheeks and that terrible cut over her left eye did it feel warm on you? Did you cut your knuckles on the exposed bones of her face?
Did you get off on that?
Oh, of course not you saved that for later, didn’t you?

I’m sure the look of sheer terror coming from those blood-spattered baby blues was true bliss for you.
I bet you felt like a man. A powerful man.

You sub-human piece of s**t

How did you like the sound her rib made when you sank your foot so deep into her torso that you bruised internal organs? Time and time again. Seven total broken ribs, SEVEN! Did they all make that gruesome sound that only bones can make when they exceed their breaking point?

Few people get to hear air escaping from lungs when punctured by the same cage that is supposed to protect them; gasping and wheezing, coughing and choking on the same blood she counted on to keep her alive...I guess you should consider yourself privileged for having gotten this pleasure.

A near lifeless body lay at your feet begging you to stop. Pleading for this to be over, beaten beyond recognition, praying to the God she so truly believed in. Trying to defend herself with one good arm and one broken one but, the only God in Oklahoma that day was the one you were trying to build out of an insecure, embryonic, sociopath. Your need to feed the power shortage was too great so, you took the only thing she had left, her dignity.

Thrust after painful thrust tearing into her, ripping her apart. Tears and blood dripping; leaking, flowing, pooling up dissolving her soul one drop at a time. And you were still searching for “power”?

Did you find it when you turned her face down?
I’ve looked it up; there is nothing in the definition of sodomy that suggests it is a power giving act. And still you took that too. You took everything from her. Then you left her for dead, lying on the side of the road like a stray dog that wondered too far out on to the highway. Like she was nothing well, she was something...someone
She was a daughter
She was a wife
She was a mother
She was human
She was a friend

Burning in hell would be too good for you, then again, for there to be a hell one would have to believe in Heaven and therefore, God but, there is no God. Not the one I was raised to believe in, not the one you think you are, not the one she relied on to get her through this nightmare.

No God looking out for the six year old who will never again feel the love of a mothers embrace. No God for the teenage daughter who stood petrified as she looked in horror at the beaten, swollen, disfigured face of the one who gave her life.
No God to stop you from the carjacking you just couldn’t pass up.
Was it like the “Price Is Right” for you? You had to see what was hidden in purse # 1?
Or was it that you simply had to know what it was like to joy ride in a two year old Jeep Grand Cherokee?

Why didn’t you make her get out?
Why did it have to go like this?
Why did you need to feel so much power?

We bury her today and the many lives you changed will begin to rebuild. Though it may take some time for some to reconcile her fate; rest assured, she will live on in the hearts of her family and friends and you will still be the small, insignificant, irrelevant, parasite that you have always been.

Sorry, just a little angry and frustrated with the event

Such a shame ... with all the tragedies all ready in the world, that there are people who walk amongst us... thinking they need to create yet one more... for their own satisfaction and gain of a thrill, or to believe they are above all morals and to take a life for any reason... be it materialistic gain or a ego trip in their own sick mind.

yes it is...

sad for the ones left to deal with the aftermath

Yes, that is perhaps the saddest part of it all... the ones left behind to try and comprehend the why, or what reason for this...

By the way...maybe this may not be the appropriate place to say so... but you write extraordinarily well. As I am sure you have heard many times before.

You have given me some things to think about today.

well as sad as that is, its the natural ways of humans. it sux that our instinct tells us to act this way. but thats tha way it is. everybody loses somebody at some point. and domestic violence is on a new rise. we have gangs that control populations, and governments that control everything we hear.

we fell down a new hole. now as humans...we are inferior, only because we dont use the rights that were givin to us out of the womb.

Mumia Abu Jamal can better explain this:

The war against us all
This war in Iraq isn't the end; it's the beginning of Wars to come
all around the world at the whim of the Neo-Cons in the White House
This is the Bush Doctrine come to life; War, war and more war!
War brought to you by the big corporate-masters who run the show
This isn't just a War on Iraqis or Afghanis or Arabs, or even Muslims
It is ultimately a War on us all!
That's because the billions and billions that are being spent on this War
the cost of tanks, rocketry, bullets and yes even salaries
for the 125,000 plus troops, is money that will never be spent on;
education, on healthcare, on the reconstruction of crumbling public housing
or to train and place the millions of workers
who have lost manufacturing jobs in the past three years alone
The War in Iraq is in reality; a war against the nations' workers and the poor
who are getting less and less
while the big Defense industries and making a killing – literally!
What's next Iran, Syria, North Korea, Venezuela?
We've already seen the corporate media
play megaphone to the White House, to build and promote a War based on lies
War is utilized by the imperialists first and foremost, to crush internal enemies
We're seeing the truth of its insight
when we see the sad state of American education
the rush of seniors to buy affordable medications from the Canadians
because American drugs are just too expensive
the threat of privatization of Social Security
and the wave of repression that comes with an increasing Militarized Police;
this is a War on all of us
And the struggle against War is really a struggle for a better life
for the millions of folks who are in need here in this country!
The fight against the War is really to fight for your own interest
not the false interests of the Defense Industry
or the corporate media or the White House
Down with the Wars for empire!

I hope writing these words gave you some form of comfort. I could feel the anger and pain in every word.

Nan

kc- my heart is breaking for you and the family. your words expressed the power of this senseless, animalistic act.

thank you for your comments

while i may agree with the first part i do fail to see the connection with the latter.

i may not be a supporter of Mr. Bush and he certainly is at fault for any number of things, i do find it quite a stretch to blame him for this act. it was a random act of murder and rape and grand theft not a political statement nor, was it a corporate plot to milk millions of dollars from the federal reserve and the tax payers.

no one is to blame but, the perpetrator of this heinous crime. maybe it is human to find other reasons for ones actions but, i think it lies squarely on the shoulders of the person responsible. there you go, what a concept...responsibility for ones own actions

perhaps your commentary would have been better suited for a different forum.

thanks for adding to the debate

oh

I have no words but emotions are flowing over ...

I am deeply saddened by this senseless tragedy. I had to stop reading several times because the pain and the weight was too heavy; I can't imagine how it must be for you. Strength and comfort to you and your family.

getting out does help
thank you posting

wow! sorry for your tragic loss and for everyone around her... unreal i dont understand such monsterious acts!!

thank you ((P))
mine is mending one fiber at a time...

((S))
no words are needed
your showing up is enough...

sorry, i just felt like i needed to get some of it out...

thank you buttons
don't try to understand it. people with morals and emotions can't...