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Success and competition are not "manly" qualities, they are HUMAN qualities. You, sir, have some serious issues.
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Yes, men are generally more muscular (i.e. your very weak sports and military argument), however, muscles do not equal intellect and drive (and if you really want to base an argument on this, I can counter that physiologically, women have been scientifically proven to have more stamina than men and are able to withstand greater physical stress). Women are more than capable and have---when not conditioned by society---just as much ambition to succeed as do men.
Your entire argument is fundamentally flawed in that you assume that it is a woman's only goal in life to make some neandertal man happy. |
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Edited by
Gustava
on
Sun 12/09/07 06:42 PM
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It seems that you come across more "career women" these days. Women who are in their thirties and forties, with looks fading fast, that still don't quite understand what men want. For some reason, with all the intelligence and value this group gives to themselves, this miss a fundamental truth. Men are not attracted to women who try to compete with them. Men, for the most part, excepting for contentious objectors, peace-niks, and fans of John Mayer, tend to like women to be feminine, soft, sensitive, etc - qualities that men typically do not (except as above) possess. Why can't these women, take off the suit, stop watching Sports Center, and just be a girl? You are an idiot. It would be nice to hear any counter thoughts you may have. Many women think of this post as a challenge, and that's where they miss the point. This post is not a challenge to say that men are better than women. The point of this post is to argue that women who take their desire to compete against a man at work, home with them, invariably leads to conflict. Men do not find it desirable to compete with a woman at home. The thing is, I don't give a f uck what some backwards neandertal thinks. If a man can't take the proverbial heat then he can go screw himself. I would never even consider being friends with a man who felt the way you do. PS. How do you people manage to breed? |
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It seems that you come across more "career women" these days. Women who are in their thirties and forties, with looks fading fast, that still don't quite understand what men want. For some reason, with all the intelligence and value this group gives to themselves, this miss a fundamental truth. Men are not attracted to women who try to compete with them. Men, for the most part, excepting for contentious objectors, peace-niks, and fans of John Mayer, tend to like women to be feminine, soft, sensitive, etc - qualities that men typically do not (except as above) possess. Why can't these women, take off the suit, stop watching Sports Center, and just be a girl? You are an idiot. |
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Sometimes though, one needs to "tell". The girls I worked with had no idea that masturbation is normal and a great way to deal with sexual urges. Telling them that they did not have to have sex with a man to explore their sexuality was a big deal.
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Gustava, so do I... it is my field... youth... and all it's complexities, here in Australia, youth is defined as 12 to 25. And yes I agree, there is a time and a place for firmness, bluntness, and I am also capable of that, however compassion , is my primary motivator.  I worked mostly with Mexican girls and the cultural imperative for becoming a mother early is a huge deal. I don't know about you, but I also was struck by the almost universal notion of female sexuality being defined by male sexuality. In other words, the girls I worked with had no outlet for their sexuality outside of male-to-female sex. There are all these girls in the throes of puberty and the only socially accepted means for them to explore their sexuality is through heterosexual intercourse... Hence, I became a huge proponent of telling girls about masturbation. |
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I think it just p!sses me off more here b/c there's no way you can actually know me and have any idea of what I'm about. In daily life I handle negativity quite well, with a smile and walking away. No, I do not know you. I do, however, know many, many women who have said and done the things you have said and (stated you've) done. I hate it when young women squander their youth, freedom, and Self unnecessarily. You've got a lot of years in front of you and it sincerely pains me to see you take your life and a potential new life so casually. I know you don't care and won't listen, but you need to love, respect, take care of, and cherish yourself (and that means no unprotected sex) before you can do any of these things for a child. Life is rare and precious and should be treated as such---your life foremost. |
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Gustava, re: your 'listening' post... A quote comes to mind.... "When the student is ready, the Teacher will appear." Can't remember whose it is, but so appropriate in life, I feel, for all of us. Yes, you do have a point. Personally, however, this entire topic/argument reminds me of raising children. I can see the mistakes and flaws in thinking and action and my immediate response is to stop it from happening. It's like watching your son with a bobby-pin heading for an electrical outlet. What do you do? Do you let him receive the shock or do you stop him? I remind him, of the dangers, and explain gently to him, that it is not healthy for him, as I reach for the safety cut out switch. Life is lessons, but yelling, shouting down, and criticising is not a way of creating a gentle dialogue, nor a place where both can communicate. I know myself, if someone TELLS me, I close my mind to them., whereas, if they suggest to me, I am open to them. I am not as gentle as you---to each her own---and I will not apologize. My hardness has been wrought and tuned through life. I once worked as a mentor for teenage girls who were "at-risk," pregnant, or already mothers. I found that being as blunt and honest as possible worked better than niceties. |
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You might as well get used to it, life and the world are not kind. There is sh it that you are going to have to deal with and hiding behind sensitivity is not going to give you the skills you are going to need to navigate this life. That said, there is much beauty and serenity to be had.
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Edited by
Gustava
on
Sun 12/09/07 04:51 PM
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Gustava, re: your 'listening' post... A quote comes to mind.... "When the student is ready, the Teacher will appear." Can't remember whose it is, but so appropriate in life, I feel, for all of us. Yes, you do have a point. Personally, however, this entire topic/argument reminds me of raising children. I can see the mistakes and flaws in thinking and action and my immediate response is to stop it from happening. It's like watching your son with a bobby-pin heading for an electrical outlet. What do you do? Do you let him receive the shock or do you stop him? |
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I keep thinking about the "listening" issue. Perhaps it is mythological, but it seems that other cultures and older cultures have/had a history of older women "mentoring" younger women; older women "passing on" what they have learned. I'm wondering a). does/did this exist? b). if it does/did exist, why do we, as women in this culture, have such a problem listening to and respecting the time and experience given knowledge of our matriarchs? I listen when someone's actually trying to help and not just being a judgmental b!tch. No, it seems that you want everyone to take your side and stroke your ego. |
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Edited by
Gustava
on
Sun 12/09/07 04:39 PM
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What happens if the grandmother becomes seriously ill or dies*? H My mother is 52 years old and as healthy and active as I am. Dont you DARE start that war.... Thats my MOTHER, my BEST FRIEND, and my partner in crime you are speaking of, don't you dare have the balls to bring something like that up to me, such as the thought of my MOTHER DYING!!! WTF is wrong with you? Oh please, save the histrionics. My mother was relatively young---and up until her unexpected diagnosis, healthy---and also my best friend. Disease and death happen. Your mother could die, it's called Life. I'm sorry, but you really do come across as a child. You really need to back the f*ck up with that one chick, you're hitting a sore spot. YES, I F*CKING KNOW THAT ONE DAY MY MOTHER WILL PROBABLY PASS BEFORE ME, BUT I REALLY DON'T WANNA THINK ABOUT THAT KIND OF DEPRESSING SH!T RIGHT NOW. HOW THE F*CK DOES LOVING MY MOTHER SO MUCH MAKE ME A F*CKING CHILD. YES, WHEN IT COMES TO MY MOTHER I'LL GET ALL KINDS OF CHILDISH ON SOMEONE OVER THAT WOMAN. Loving your mother does not make you a "child". Becoming irrational, petulant, and hysterical over a legitimate point demonstrates a basic immaturity. I hope your mother lives another 50 years. I really do. Losing my mother was one of the biggest blows in my life. However, my point is, you cannot rely on anyone but yourself to raise your child. Like we used to say, sh it happens. |
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Edited by
Gustava
on
Sun 12/09/07 04:18 PM
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What happens if the grandmother becomes seriously ill or dies*? H My mother is 52 years old and as healthy and active as I am. Dont you DARE start that war.... Thats my MOTHER, my BEST FRIEND, and my partner in crime you are speaking of, don't you dare have the balls to bring something like that up to me, such as the thought of my MOTHER DYING!!! WTF is wrong with you? Oh please, save the histrionics. My mother was relatively young---and up until her unexpected diagnosis, healthy---and also my best friend. Disease and death happen. Your mother could die, it's called Life. I'm sorry, but you really do come across as a child. |
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I keep thinking about the "listening" issue. Perhaps it is mythological, but it seems that other cultures and older cultures have/had a history of older women "mentoring" younger women; older women "passing on" what they have learned. I'm wondering a). does/did this exist? b). if it does/did exist, why do we, as women in this culture, have such a problem listening to and respecting the time and experience given knowledge of our matriarchs?
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...I know I wouldn't have listened to anyone at her age... I was pondering this earlier. Would I have listened to older and more experienced women? I don't think I would have listened to my mother, however, I would have listened to my older sisters (they are 20+ years older than I). One thing I did pay attention to was the mistakes I saw folks make. |
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i applaud you lee as i wouldnt abort either and i stated earlier that the guy should have protected himself but her attitude about not protecting herself against disease really rankles me. Yeah, the man is an idiot. If I were a man having sex with a woman, there is no way in hell I'd trust her on the issue of birth control. |
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...Who does have it all together, when having their first child, who doesn't have a child for selfish reasons?... I actually did have it "all together" when my first kid was born. I wouldn't have had him if my husband and I weren't prepared financially, emotionally, and intellectually. I'm glad it worked out for you but tell me, how many folks has it not worked out for? |
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hmmm...i personally feel that having the entire family involved in raising a child is a good thing. ... Of course it's a "good thing". However, one should not rely on one's family to support, raise, care for, etc, one's child. What happens if the grandmother becomes seriously ill or dies*? Having family is important, but you damn well better be able to take care of your children by yourself. *Speaking from experience, I would have been in a hell of a mess had I relied on my mother to help raise my children---she got sick and died of cancer when they (children) were pretty young. |
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PEOPLE....you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink. She has an answer for everything...She knows all...Put an end to this thread...please.... It's just so frustrating. |
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I would be curious how mom and auntie felt about raising yet another child, especially when the mother of the child has chosen to have a child under these circumstances. I don't know about the rest of the mothers, but I've got 6-8 years until my kids are responsible for themselves (at that time I'm going to be doing all the things I couldn't while they were young) and there is no way in hell I'm going to start over and raise my kids' kids. |
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