Community > Posts By > newguy

 
newguy's photo
Fri 08/07/09 05:56 AM
rofl AWW MANrofl rofl

newguy's photo
Sun 08/02/09 10:41 AM
I sure do hope and pray that mr. hinkley gets that letter:banana: :banana: :banana:

newguy's photo
Fri 07/31/09 02:17 PM
Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting.

Well, for example, the other day my wife and I went into town and went into a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said, 'Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?'

He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started Writing another ticket for having worn tires. So my wife called him a ****-head. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.

Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus and the car had an Obama sticker. We try to have a little fun each day now that we're retired. It's important at our age

newguy's photo
Fri 07/31/09 02:15 PM
The letter was sent to the Principal's office after the school had sponsored a luncheon for the elderly. An old lady received a new radio at the lunch as a door prize and was writing to say "thank you". This story is a credit to all humankind. Forward to anyone you know who might need a lift today.

Dear Pine Street Elementary:

God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent senior citizens luncheon. I am 84 years old and live at the Rosecrest Retirement Home. All of my family has passed away. I am all alone now and it's nice to know that someone is thinking of me. God bless you for your kindness to an old forgotten lady.

My roommate is 95 and has always had her own radio, but before I received one, she would never let me listen to hers, even when she was napping. The other day her radio fell off the nightstand and broke into a lot of pieces. It was awful and she was in tears. Her distress over the broken radio touched me and I knew this was God's way of answering my prayers.

She asked if she could listen to mine, and I told her to kiss my a$$

Thank you for that opportunity.

newguy's photo
Fri 07/31/09 02:03 PM
A farmer named Clyde had a car accident. In court, the trucking company's fancy hot shot lawyer was questioning Clyde. "Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?" asked the lawyer.

Clyde responded, "Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite cow, Bessie, into the..."

"I didn't ask for any details", the lawyer interrupted. "Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?"

Clyde said, "Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road...."

The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Your Honor, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question."

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Clyde 's answer and said to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favorite cow, Bessie".

Clyde thanked the Judge and proceeded. "Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite cow, into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting, real bad and didn't want to move.

However, I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans. Shortly after the accident a Highway Patrolman came on the scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

Then the Patrolman came across the road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, "How are you feeling?"

"Now what the hell would you say?"






newguy's photo
Thu 07/30/09 08:28 AM
I come from the "OLD SCHOOL" here.
If I saw something like that going on?........So GOD HELP ME! Someone is gonna wind up in the hospital......and it sure won't be me!
HOMEY DON'T PLAY DAT GAME!:angry:

newguy's photo
Wed 07/29/09 09:49 AM
hey there lookingformyangel25................GO TO THE POLITIC FORUMS!grumble

some people here can be soooooooooo DENCE!

newguy's photo
Sat 07/25/09 07:44 AM
Loved them all:banana:

newguy's photo
Wed 07/22/09 09:30 AM
LOL you caught that too eh wisdom?:wink:

newguy's photo
Wed 07/22/09 09:19 AM
AMEN BROTHER!!!!!rofl rofl rofl rofl

newguy's photo
Wed 07/22/09 08:14 AM


At this time,I would like to thank my Mother. she is going to give me 25 bucks to join a pay dating site. I hope I will be able to meet some local women. Thanx,Mom. be seeing you


How sad.
I agree

newguy's photo
Wed 07/22/09 07:59 AM
nice profile
becareful and have fun.

newguy's photo
Wed 07/22/09 07:50 AM
the "IT" factor is in everyone on here if you look hard enough .bigsmile

newguy's photo
Wed 07/22/09 05:57 AM
you have no idea how many people I know who are similar to that doltlaugh

newguy's photo
Mon 07/20/09 06:48 PM
"DANG".....1 little ole typo frustrated

newguy's photo
Mon 07/20/09 09:16 AM
just another day in paradise herebigsmile

newguy's photo
Mon 07/20/09 08:27 AM
he makes a good point

newguy's photo
Mon 07/20/09 08:25 AM





Prisoner, I like you. You seem like a great guy. But please tell me, what's with the "be seeing you" thing?



Oh NOOOOOO! Not again! frustrated :laughing:


I assume someone else asked? I looked for someone to ask, but didn't see it. laugh

OK, Prisoner. Have your supar seecrit. :wink:


the man makes a good point there
Only about a zillion people! laugh It was worse when he didn't have a pic posted... It's amazing how those three lil words intimidated so many supposed "intelligent" people! :wink:
rofl the 3 most intimidating words since,'i love you'. be seeing you

newguy's photo
Mon 07/20/09 08:16 AM
you've replied 9262 times on here to different posts,and your still asking for profile ratings?huh

newguy's photo
Mon 07/20/09 07:46 AM
Go for it girls:banana:

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