(Should a man approach ye, ye shall honor it.)


Well, Happy Chinese New Year ladies and gentlemen, it definitely came in with a frigid bang (also referencing the Vancouver Winter Olympics). All the excitement (including the birthday of the author) took me back to the eager spirits of New Years Eve, a day on which alcoholic beverages flow like personalized rivers. I had been invited to the party of a friend's friend and was granted a guest; I took on the risk of a night with a guy whom I'd had a crush on for three years (which was promptly ended post-January, so that's the last you'll be hearing of it).

But during the party itself, there were mostly fidgety youth, the kind who inevitably remind you of yourself when you were young--if you were fortunate enough, in that sense. So, I puppy-leashed my awkward faux-date around, between schoolmates he aimed to avoid and the like and eventually found myself face to face with a small, thin girl in a somewhat typically cute outfit shouting with excitement about how there were three of something, someone at the party. As things would have it, I was one of three gay men... guys... individuals at the party, which obviously made something worth shouting about.

First Encounter with 3rd gay individual: he giddily introduces myself. note the keystone light in his left hand.

Second Encounter with 3rd gay individual: he uninhibitedly began small-talking me with no impressive attempt to hide his interest, despite the 2nd gay individual obviously there as my guest? yeah.

Third Encounter with 3rd gay individual: people sitting on couch. someone want photo of people on couch. to avoid being caught between 3rd gay individual and 2nd gay individual, I offered to take the photo. didn't need a Twix bar for that.

Fourth Encounter with 3rd gay individual: 11:40pm, twenty minutes before midnight, 3rd gay individual rounds behind the couch and directly says, "Happy New Year!" and kamikaze kisses me on right cheek. act genuinely uncertain-- immediately.


Now here's the unexpected twist. The next week I begin to actively communicate with 3rd gay individual AND three-year crush guy.

Why, you ask?

Because, though his actions were impaired by a terrible beverage with alcohol content, brash, even offensive, I figure if this kid has the air to be so bold in order to attract my attention, it merits some respect, at the least.

I'd take a risk with a bold ******* over sitting quietly in a car with a boy and a one-sided conversation any day.

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I don't think anyone can legitimately criticize her for... seeking prayer for her hospitalized son via Twitter.

I mean hellooo people-- this is what Twitter and the broader Internets are for: dissiminating messages to a wide audience.

Some people are real idiots who need hobbies, gosh...