On We Go

Enough with the love
Smoopy whoopy I need you crap
Leave the heartache and loss in the past
Go ahead and cry those tears
Just make sure after you dry them
You smile and continue on
Love and loss are a very small part
Of this wild and crazy journey we call life
We cannot forget laughter and the new friendships
That just might lie ahead
For a time my every thought
Revolved around the past
Wishing I could somehow bring him back
Reality says I can’t
My heart says why would you want to?
And a little voice inside just whispered
Keep moving
Pick yourself up brush off
And continue on
If time doesn’t even stop after we’re gone
Why should it stop while there’s still so much to discover?
Whether we lose a loved one to time
Or another being
It cannot consume our every thought
Dry those eyes
And remember we are better for having them while we did

On days like today
I wish there was a golden stairway
Brought down by a single tear born of longing
Then I could just climb high into the clouds
Call out your name
And find myself cradled in your arms
Rambling about now meaningless events
With a laugh you’ll remind me you saw it all
After awhile I would descend the staircase with one last glance
Your scent clinging to my shirt
Happiness would finally be restored
If only there were a stairway to you..

thanks

All too often i'm asked

If it's too hard, too stressful to be with him why stay?

Waves of anger turn my insides to liquid fire

They just don't understand

At a time when my entire world was being tossed around

Shattering and tearing to tiny peices

He put this smile back in place

And made the darkness brighter than the summer sun

Soon the days were filled with anticipation

My heart leapt each time the phone rang

Finally the rest of the world fell away

His laughter fills my soul with hope

Every I love you has been etched in my heart

Because despite the hell he lives every day...

I know with every fiber of my being

That it is now

And forever will be

The god honest truth

I fell in love with the man

The occupation is just a bigger obsticle

On this road of life we all must travel

Though I never wanted

To encounter such a hard thing

I refuse to turn away

He needs me

As I need him

Loving him has not always been easy

But it is as necessary as breathing

Once upon a time

I tried not to love him

Not to feel the longing

Simmering beneath the surface

It did no good

Yes he is a soldier

Nights are often sleepless

Days are filled with anxiety

But i'll always stand beside him

Why?

Because each day my pride and love for him

Grows ever stronger

I love him because

He made me whole again

i used to be concerened because im scared of everything lol but they said the same thing in 99 and 00

i think its a load of bs they say that all the time

nah not amazing just greatful

lately i've been doing ALOT of reflecting and though it's true i've been through hell and back the fact that i have amazing friends is also true especially one in particular i don't think he knows it but at times his friendship was the one i leaned on the most especially when things could no longer be held in...he always has been there to listen and to make me smile through my tears no matter the kind of day he was having i've never met a more kind-hearted human being in my entire life seriously he is my sunshine on a rainy day and my sunny days are made even sunnier once upon a time i questioned my belief in god because it seemed like even though i was crying out for someone to truely understand nobody couldd and it was as if he couldn't hear me but then came this friendship and all of the sudden i knew i wasnt alone anymore and yes there are many others but few share the same bond he and i do the mere thought of days without him brings unrelenting tears none of us know just how long we'll be here and i've learned to tell those you care for just what they mean to you so here i have andrew is pretty much the greatest friend i've ever had and i really truly hope he finds love and happiness cuz if anyone deserves it its him.. i have been so blessed to have such a awesome friend

Awwwwww i feel so loved

you never called me amber you loser lol

we finally have the net at dads but i wont be on as much because i finally have a life lol

im makin it anyway

moved out of moms house i have no internet at the moment but im fine

mine was awesome with the exception of sunday afternoon

mornin guys how was the weekend?

welcome to jsh wilga


ok umm hmm dont think i wanna know what i've been missin lol

Emotions a-stir
Hatred simmers just below the surface
Yet the twinkle in your eyes defuses the bomb
Tis the season to be jolly?
Sorry you're barking up the wrong tree
The whole holly jolly christmas thing just isn't for me
I do like the mistletoe
But only when you're here
The happiness you fill me with is amazing
Maybe-
Just maybe
Things could be different
For just one year
Forget the big red bows
Screw stupid twinkling lights
But one little kiss under the mistletoe
Might be nice

those of u who know me well know i lost a very important person this past summer so the holidays are hard i dont plan on bein around until after christmas but for the few of you i hold really close i'll be on myspace those of u who i wanted to find me have my url to the rest of you..have a merry christmas

thanks

lmao not yet