Community > Posts By > lilwmn

 
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Thu 11/15/18 09:27 AM
The one that cracks me up is when they say I want a REAL woman. WTF does that even mean?

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Thu 11/15/18 08:59 AM
Edited by lilwmn on Thu 11/15/18 09:04 AM
Wow oldkid, you never met an intelligent, independent,logical, self confident, and emotionally strong woman? That seems very odd because they are in abundance. Or maybe you just don't realise they are all or many of those things. Do you assume guys are superior? Just curious.
It sounds like you don't even like women. How are you supposed to find one for you if you don't even like them. Most women want to at least be liked. Lol

If you have really never been around a woman like that it's ashame.


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Thu 11/15/18 08:13 AM
Edited by lilwmn on Thu 11/15/18 08:23 AM


However, I have a test that I use, and I know I'm not the only man who uses it.  When I'm really strongly attracted to someone -- a woman who is truly special -- I have difficulty thinking about her sexually.  It's not a matter of desire or physical attraction -- the desire and will is there.  Rather, it's that the attraction to personality, common interests, common goals, thought processes, etc. (all the intangibles) is so strong that sex becomes a secondary thought.  I'm too busy thinking of the entirety of who she is, and how that makes me feel.


This is very interesting to me. The attraction to the personality, interests, goals, thought processes is what makes me desire sex with someone more. It's very rare I would desire sex with someone  just for looks or appearance, if at all. I've never looked at a nice looking guy and thought, wow I'd like to do him. It's the whole person that creates the desire for me, most of the time.



At first glance, this sounds bad, right?  The truth is that when a woman is so special that we are attracted to her entire being, many of us men simply don't sexually fantasize about her.  It becomes an alien thought to us.  We may think of how physically beautiful she is, and that may make our heart flutter.  But then we will think about something she said, or something she did, or the way she expresses herself....anything but wanting to get in her pants.  Why?  Some would say it's because she arouses our spirit rather than our loins.  She lifts our whole being.


When  a guy can actually touch my spirit/soul I want to get as close to him as I can creating that sexual desire.



I also think sexual desire is much more complicated than some people realize.  If a man or woman "friend zones" a person based on lack of sexual desire, they may not be giving themselves a chance to recognize other forms of attraction which can lead to sexual desire.  They are basing it too much on the physical or first impressions rather than actually bothering to get to know the person on a more intimate-but-non-physical level.



This is exactly why I need a friendship bond first. It takes time to get to know someone and make those connections. Too many today think that within a few dates someone should know if they want to be intimate with someone. And maybe because they themselves base it off looks. I base it on the whole being.  How much can you really get to know someone in that time frame?

I have met a couple guys in the past. I was not physically attracted to them at the beginning. As I got to know their whole being, it was as though I saw them differently. Even the physical aspects that were a turn off initially I  saw differently after getting to know them. They weren't a turn off, but now became a turn on because of seeing them as a whole of who they were. Does that make sense?


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Thu 11/15/18 07:47 AM
That's GREAT!Best to you.

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Wed 11/14/18 08:12 PM
Thinking it's time for bed.

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Wed 11/14/18 08:08 PM
A bunch of love
Loads of friendship
Some sweetness
Some hotness and spice
A dash of spontaneity
Much laughter

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Wed 11/14/18 07:52 PM
waving

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Wed 11/14/18 07:46 PM
 

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Wed 11/14/18 07:08 PM
Thanks for the suggestion, it's working out good so far.

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Wed 11/14/18 05:58 PM
^^^Don't ruin a possible great thing by overthinking.

OT What dessert I'm going to have.

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Wed 11/14/18 05:27 PM


A lot of guys say, let's just be friends... and "see where it leads."


They are most likely using the term friends as a means to see if they can pry your legs open. They likely do not really want to be friends. If someone genuinely is interested in friendship with you they will not care where it leads. It's pretty simple.


This is so true. I can't tell you how many times I've heard that, but it becomes very obvious that is not the case. What they really mean is they want a f...buddy. It got so old, I gave up looking for anything.

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Wed 11/14/18 02:51 PM
It's not hogging all the blankets. It's sharing that last piece of dessert

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Wed 11/14/18 01:50 PM
I'm one of 6 siblings, 5 girls and one boy. I'm number 3

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Wed 11/14/18 11:46 AM
This phone and this site isn't working well together:(argh

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Wed 11/14/18 10:12 AM
I would bet more people found their mate just through their everyday encounters, not searching. I'm just guessing. I do know a few that found then searching online, but I think that's a rarity.

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Wed 11/14/18 09:36 AM
Edited by lilwmn on Wed 11/14/18 09:38 AM


I think the friend zone is really just another way of saying, "I don't know what I want."


I know exactly what I'm looking for. When I befriend someone there is already a connection of some type. It's probably something basic like personality,
humor, easy to talk to. The point of a friendship is to grow, enjoy, andget closer and know more about them. Isn't there vulnerability whenever you open up to someone?

Can you not stay friends with someone if it doesn't work out romantically if you were true friends first?

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Wed 11/14/18 09:09 AM
I never give a compliment unless I genuinely mean it.

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Wed 11/14/18 08:06 AM
For a partner I want someone that is my best friend. It takes time to know if a guy can be your best friend and if you're compatible for something long term. Although not every guy you develop a friendship with will turn into anything but friends.

So where do you start to find that out? I'd think a friendship.

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Tue 11/13/18 08:04 PM
Hmmm..I don't really know anyone well in here to really say. So maybe I'll just kiss all the guys and find the kisser I like best

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Tue 11/13/18 07:37 PM
I'm thinking I should be in bed right now.

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