after i posted, i read the forum rules and found a section that said youre not allowed to post if youre fishing for pity... I felt that my post could have been taken in that way, so on top of everything else, i felt like a heel for even trying.
thank you for responding to me. youre right, i do feel better than i did. before it was just mindless flailing, now i feel like there is something i can do.
and dont worry my friend, i never think twice about helping others! my profession allows me to help injured workers retrain and return to work... so that i am thankful for. next time i help anyone i'll think of when you helped me!

@bastet126: you're right, he's a very smart guy. btw i love your photo, its mesmerising.

dude, that was probably probably the most useful thing i have ever heard someone say to me.
When I broke up with my last girlfriend I figured it would be smart to use the time to get back to myself... I don't think I ever really did. I still have to figure out how to like myself. Since I dont have a choice of being me or not being me, existence will be pretty miserable if i don't like me.
Thank you for taking the time to write, friend.

I'm sorry i complain so much.
I have been single for 3 years, and i dont know how to escape it. Other peoeple, people who see me every day(not even my friends), look at me and wonder why I am single. it is embarassing and i have no answer to give them. Now one of my students is taking me clothes shopping on friday because he is convinced that my clothes are to blame.
My self esteem is zero, I can't see any part of me that is worth much of anything, so I don't really have anything to offer a potential significant other. I know it's hard for someone to love you when you hate yourself in the first place, but I feel very trapped and I can't stop whatever thinking is inside me that is destroying everything.
All i ever wanted was someone who I could share life with. Someone I could care for, provide with support in every way and defend with my life. I don't know how to find her when I can't even look at myself in the mirror. I don't understand where i went wrong.

ps - I am very sorry that I wrote this and threw it at you guys, I don't expect anyone to solve my problems! I just needed an invisible friend to vent at and maybe someone out there has been in a similar situation.
If you have read this far, thank you and again, i'm sorry.

lol!

i think my sign would say "DO NOT ENTER"

WELCOME.
i am new to this as well, so good luck to us both

I lost interest in meetin people at bars a while ago. It's very superficial and retarded.
So I came here to express my interest in a real relationship, I am very shy by nature so this is the best way I can express that!!

That's funny... I was looking at a map earlier and one of the boxes on it told me that.

Yeah I'm about finished with nonsense too, and I am looking for a future with someone. I am trying to find someone who I can support who will return the favour!

@queene123: thanks for the welcome, your halloween poster is also terrifying.

@rainbowTrout: sleepy hollow was buried under about a mile of ice when the new ice age began.
Go figure.

@rainbowTrout: if I am a rose, then i would like another name. Something like killbot or rose from the dead.

@cypoet: AAAAAAAA.

@gossipmpm: it's ok. And thanks for the welcome, friend.

Hey toronto, I am new here and I am trying to lose my online dating virginity.
I am inherently shy, and I have a hard time meeting anyone new. Thankfully the Internet can offer an alternative to approaching strangers...
I am very honest, friendly and I know how to make people laugh. Now all of my friends are married or getting married, I am feeling like I am broken or something is wrong with me. Why is it I don't know how to express interest in having a relationship with someone yet??
All I want is someone I can be the for, someone I can take care of. And hope they will return the favour.
I just wanted to introduce myself and maybe meet some of you people... Now that you all think I am insane, at least we got off on the right foot.