Community > Posts By > jscottelwood

 
jscottelwood's photo
Sat 02/09/08 01:20 PM
Hi !!!

I'm new and I need some friends.

Would you be willing to reciprocate?

Jeff

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 02/09/08 12:47 PM
yes!!!

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 02/09/08 12:45 PM
No...but I do chat well!!!

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 02/09/08 12:42 PM
You, Girl, are a frickin' nut...

I thank God for people like you!!!

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 02/09/08 12:39 PM
don't talk much, do you?

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 02/09/08 12:14 PM
"The sinners are much more fun, only the good die young"

Billy Joel

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 02/09/08 12:08 PM
Just wanted to tell you that we are a rare and valuable breed.

I spent 6 years in the special forces (now special ops) and paratroopers.

It was the most exciting and rewarding time of my entire life.

Jeff

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 02/09/08 12:04 PM
Welcome!

I'm new here too...

From Mpls/St. Paul Minnesota.

Everyone here seems very friendly and helpful.

Let me know if I can answer any questions for you.

Jeff

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 02/09/08 12:01 PM
spring for four hundred dollars and buy her her own computer at wal-mart.

Also, "GET A SYSTEM DISC!!!!!" for all computers.

I bought a used computer system (desktop) for $125.00 at a local computer sales office. Then I got a windows 2000 system disk and built mine from the ground up. I have a 256 Gb HD, 1,024 RAM, defender pro software and all capabilities of XP at three times the speed.

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 02/09/08 11:49 AM
I apologize, a thousand fold, for any dissemination of opinion or feelings which may have had a deleterious effect on you concerning your continued happiness in this life.

jscottelwood's photo
Sun 02/03/08 05:29 PM
hey Hikerchick... It's quite easy really...check out my profile now...(we should all have the same profile...how spooky)

PS: just copy and paste

jscottelwood's photo
Sun 01/27/08 04:21 PM
An old quote comes to mind...

"If you're constantly disappointed...simply lower your standards"

Or, put another way...Just Lie!!!

jscottelwood's photo
Sun 01/27/08 12:36 PM
Didn't JB get charged with betting on his games?

jscottelwood's photo
Sun 01/27/08 12:35 PM
My SIG Sauer P220, .45 Auto...They would have to pry it from my cold, dead hands!

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 01/26/08 05:50 PM
They are just a bunch of silicon Barbies...

You can just google up your own "miss naked america" contestants online and save on the cable bill.

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 01/26/08 05:46 PM
PERHAPS>>>>>>>>>>>>

He has a very large life insurance policy and she simply wishes to ask you a favor down the road.....HMMMM

jscottelwood's photo
Sat 01/26/08 05:42 PM
RUN!!! DO NOT WALK!!!to the nearest "EXIT"

If she will treat this guy like that...guess what...you're next.

A tiger can't change it's stripes.

If she isn't mature and decent enough to end it with him before looking elsewhere, then she isn't worth your time.

(unless, of course, you are hideously ugly and will settle for anything with a crack)

jscottelwood's photo
Fri 01/25/08 06:55 PM
Facts tell and stories sell...

jscottelwood's photo
Thu 01/24/08 07:08 PM
"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."
"A real friend is one who believes in you when you have ceased to believe in yourself."

A farmer had some puppies he needed to sell. He painted a sign advertising the four pups and set about nailing it to a post on the edge of his yard. As he was driving the last nail into the post he felt a tug on his overalls. He looked down into the eyes of little boy. "Mister," he said, "I want to buy one of your puppies." "Well," said the farmer, as he rubbed the sweat off the back of his neck, "these puppies come from fine parents and cost a good deal of money." The boy dropped his head for a moment, then reaching deep into his pocket, he pulled out a handful of change and held it up to the farmer. "I've got thirty-nine cents." "Is that enough to take a look?" "Sure," said the farmer, and with that he let out a whistle. "Here, Dolly!" he called. Out from the doghouse and down the ramp ran Dolly followed by four little balls of fur. The little boy pressed his face against the chain link fence. His eyes danced with delight. As the dogs made their way to the fence, the little boy noticed something else stirring inside the doghouse. Slowly another little ball appeared, this one noticeably smaller. Down the ramp it slid. Then in a somewhat awkward manner, the little pup began hobbling toward the others, doing its best to catch up.... "I want that one," the little boy said, pointing to the runt. The farmer knelt down at the boy's side and said, "Son, you don't want that puppy." "He will never be able to run and play with you like these other dogs would." With that the little boy stepped back from the fence, reached down, and began rolling up one leg of his trousers. In doing so he revealed a steel brace running down both sides of his leg attaching itself to a specially made shoe. Looking back up at the farmer, he said, "You see sir, I don't run too well myself and he will need someone who understands." With tears in his eyes, the farmer reached down and picked up the little pup. Holding it carefully, handed it to the little boy. "How much?" asked the little boy. "No charge," answered the farmer, "There's no charge for love."

"I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet".

Stop whining about what you don't have and just thank God for what you do!!!

jscottelwood's photo
Thu 01/24/08 06:48 PM
There was a little bird living in a tree in northern Minnesota. Autumn had passed and the multi-colored leaves were falling from the trees. All of his friends were preparing to migrate south for the winter as they had done innumerable times before. Well, the little bird decided he had had enough. He wasn't going to do it this year. He was going to stay and tough it out no matter what. He said goodbye to all the other birds as they flew off and settled back to enjoy his time alone and rest up instead of running away. Time passed and November arrived with the first snow storm. The temperature plummeted and the little bird was really getting cold and hungry. A few more days passed and the sub-zero temperatures arrived. The little bird said to himself, "I was crazy, I'll never survive here, I had better get moving before I freeze solid". He took off flying and went about sixteen miles before his little wings started to become numb. After a couple more miles his wings were frozen and useless and he came crashing to the ground in a farmer's field. He was lying there about to lose consciousness when a cow walked over and took a dump right on top of him. After a few minutes the heat from the deposit started warming him up. He started to feel his wings again. A few more minutes passed and he felt warm all over. He was so happy that he was going to survive and make it that he began to sing. The farmer's cat was nearby, heard the singing, cleared off the crap, and ate the bird.

The three morals to this story are:

1. Everyone that craps on you isn't necessarily your enemy.
2. Everyone that gets you out of the crap isn't necessarily your friend.
3. If you're warm and happy in a pile of crap, keep your mouth shut.

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