42" plasma tv

(porn music chimes in)

lol thats some funny stuff there.

no but i have woke in my driveway lol

i have. and then there was a couple times ive been stood up to so it goes both ways lol

i have distrust in that corn i found now

im not worthy

all hail the blue box of wonder and amazing adventures

surfing

there is no last tatt i spat

as i sat

in the back of this bar where i picked up a scar

maybe it was a word she said to me
"open your eyes" how can you see?
or maybe a few

as stumbling drunks often do
need to pee! at the top of my lungs, i did nt know i screamed.
blurred and three of every thing it seemed.

i ve been here once i echoed quitely
mumbles as far as every one else could hear
i return, i order another beer

drown it out
i thought it was a shout

just another mumble alls could be made out

i got this **** in nam
never been
did nt sound like fun

"wake up"

time to leave
i ve called a cab
you burnt lush
heres one for the road
dont make me blush
hardly standing with a head rush

caaaaaaaaaab
wheat ther ****ers a cab?

in i went as i puked and spent

home im not where the hell

out i spill

fumble for keys as i whisper out loud

striupid calb

"need my money
dont call again honey"

upstairs i waiver
keys in the lock several later
open and see

it is hommmm

fall and flander
puke and wander

awaken with an encrusted shirt sleeve

"what the hell? did it again, oh god please"

this is the funniest post i have ever read.
i salute you bill, but do hope your love life gets better. thanks for the translation, izzie.