50 Mistakes Men Make When Having Sex

1 Going straight for the naughty bits


You've got to be sensitive to the fact that a woman is more likely to be
irritated than aroused when a man dives for her breasts and vulva after
a few minutes' perfunctory kissing. While you might get to feel the
goods, you're not going to be invited back.

2 Not knowing how to kiss sensitively


Passionate or sensitive, firm or gentle, good kissing is an art form
which lubricates the wheels of sex and gets everyone in the mood for
more intimacy. Learn how to kiss, and do it well. That doesn't mean
sticking your tongue in her mouth and wiggling it around like you're
trying to floss her teeth.

3 Being too rough when you touch her erogenous zones


Men like a firmer touch than women, especially when it comes to our
penises. So if you touch her clitoris with as much force as you apply to
your penis when you masturbate, she's most likely to howl with pain -
and then kick you out of bed. Remember: the clitoris has twice as many
nerve endings as the penis, in a much smaller area. Treat it with
respect. It's the only organ in the human body that has no function
other than to provide pleasure.

4 Not stroking and caressing her


A woman's second biggest sex organ is her skin. (The first is her mind.)
You can make your touch on any part of her body into a sexy caress, but
you have to focus on what you're doing and put some sexual energy into
your fingers while you caress her. That means not thinking about the
baseball game while you're giving her a sensuous massage.

5 Locking onto her nipples like a suckling child


Yes, we know it's fun for you. To her it just feels like she's got a
teething infant hanging off her breast. Lick and kiss around her whole
breast before you go for the nipple, then flick your tongue gently
across the nipple and around the areolae. If she likes what you're
doing, you'll know by her moans of pleasure.

6 Biting on her earlobe because you think it's sexy


She may not agree with you. In which case it will just be irritating for
her, not a prelude to her turning into the sex goddess you thought you
were summoning up.

7 Leaving a hickey on her neck like a teenage badge of honor


If you're over sixteen, this is a no-no. If you need to know why, you're
obviously under sixteen.

8 Not shaving before sex


When you're in the throes of passion, having your beard stubble brushing
back and forth across her face isn't so sexy, but at least it'll produce
a red rash she can remember you by.

9 Not washing your pits and bits before you have sex


If there's one thing that turns women off, it's a lover whose personal
hygiene isn't up to scratch. Even though men have a higher smell
threshold than women, keeping yourself clean - especially in the more
intimate corners of your anatomy (like under your foreskin) - is not
just a matter of courtesy, it's a ticket back to the bedroom.

10 Forgetting she has a sensuous body waiting to be stroked


Pretty much the same point we already made up above, but worth
remembering: touch doesn't just have to be in the bedroom, a prelude to
sex. In fact, if you touch her a lot in a loving way during the day,
she'll be ready to melt into your arms by bedtime.

11 Trying to get your fingers in her underwear before she's ready


This is the mark of a gauche teenage lover who wants to get to fourth
base just so he feels more accomplished as a lover. Take your time, let
things evolve naturally, and apply a little sensuous touch on the fabric
covering her vulva before you dive under the elastic. The hint of what's
to come is often more erotic than diving straight in there.

12 Dropping the condom on the floor


Must we say why this isn't the most popular move post sex? Dispose of
the condom tidily in a tissue - put it in the bin rather than down the
toilet, or it's likely to float there for some time to come as a
reminder of your sexual encounter.

13 Going straight for the clitoris during oral sex or masturbation


Like we said above, most women just find this irritating - and, if you
press too hard, bloody uncomfortable too. Your first caresses should be
on her labia, the lips of her vulva, then as she gets more aroused, you
can work nearer the clitoris itself. But even when she's aroused a soft
touch along the sides of her clitoris may be more acceptable for her
than any pressure on the head of her clitoris.

14 Breaking off just as she's getting to the point where she wants you
to keep going at all costs


Women often get so lost in their sexual arousal that they forget to give
feedback. In reality, the fact that she's lying there quietly may
actually mean she loves what you're doing; if so, you should feel her
pressing her vulva against your mouth or fingers, or shifting like she
wants more touch, rather than giving you a sense that she'd rather be
out shopping.

15 Undressing her clumsily


Listen up guys: you don't have to be able to take her bra off with one
hand, behind her back, while kissing her. In fact, in my experience,
it's better if you don't try. She probably puts it on by fastening it
first and pulling it over her head anyway. Let her take off the garments
you don't understand, and whenever you do lend a helping hand, undress
her gently and sensuously rather than pulling at her clothes like you're
ripping the paper off a birthday present.

16 Undressing yourself inelegantly - which includes taking your socks
off after your underwear


Nothing is more comical (or pathetic) to a woman than a man in his socks
and pants. Except possibly a naked man wearing socks. If you don't
understand why, just accept that it is so.

17 Expecting her to shave for you


You might like the baby smooth look around her vulva, but she's more
likely to see this as a prickly route to itchy stubble. Ask her nicely
if you'd like her to go smooth. If she says "no", accept that
graciously.

18 Sticking a finger up her vagina before she's ready, willing and able


In general, women do like to be penetrated just as much as men like to
penetrate, which, considering how much men like to stick things up
there, is just as well. However, she'll only want you to do this when
the time is right - i.e. when she's aroused enough to enjoy it. If
you're giving her clitoris attention, there'll be a point where she
might like to have a finger or two inside her. If so, be gentle, and
start with one finger on her G-spot. Make sure she enjoys this before
you put another one up there. Two fingers on her G-spot is probably as
much as she will want. And be just as firm with your touch as she finds
pleasurable. If you don't know what the G-spot is, then do some
Google-ing before you get into bed.

19 Entering her without asking her first


What is it with men and these dark, wet places? Just keep in mind that
she decides how far sex goes, and if she doesn't want to enjoy
intercourse then don't press the point. This applies especially to any
strategy that involves nudging your penis into position and then
pressing forward without her consent, verbal or otherwise! Having said
that, you don't always need to ask "May I enter you?" though it can be a
romantic and sexy thing to do if you're looking deep into her eyes.
Needless to say, that's most likely to happen in the man on top
position, which, by the way, remains everyone's most popular position
for sex.

20 Pecking away around her vagina with your penis if you can't find the
way in


This is, by all accounts, many women's least desired sexual moment. If
for any reason you can't get in, don't pretend you're in control and
keep trying. Simply ask her to guide you in with her hand. That way
you'll save a lot of embarrassment, not to mention time.

20 Pumping away without regard for her pleasure


When you've achieved your most desired objective, and your penis is
inside her, you'll want to show a certain consideration for her
pleasure. She may want hard and fast thrusting, but it's best to start
slow and shallow. While you're making love, she'll most appreciate your
efforts if you're masculine and strong - which is to say, if you act
like you know what you're doing, you're considerate and gentle at first,
and work up to firm and strong thrusts if she likes them.

21 Expecting her to make love bottom up


Yes, we all enjoy rear entry. But she may be more self-conscious of her
butt, she may feel like a sex object, and she may not like the rather
impersonal nature of this position. If you really want to do it, and you
explain to her why you like it so much (i.e. "It's incredibly exciting
to see your gorgeous bottom as we make love", rather than "I get so
turned on ****ing from behind") she'll probably co-operate from time to
time, even if it's only on your birthday and hers.

22 Thrusting too hard


If you happen to be well-endowed, or she has a short vagina, and you
thrust too hard, you may end up banging her cervix. This can make her
shriek, though sadly not with sexual pleasure.

22 Coming before she's got excited or begun to enjoy sex


There aren't many men who can last long enough to really satisfy a woman
who enjoys vaginal intercourse and G-spot stimulation. If you can't be
bothered learning how to be a long lasting lover, then at least have the
decency to keep going for a few minutes so she gets some pleasure. This
isn't hard, and there are plenty of ways you can learn to extend
intercourse and not come so quickly. Do some research on Google for "end
premature ejaculation". See also number 26.

23 Not coming at all - or losing your erection when you put the condom
on


If you're one of that rarer breed of men who has trouble coming during
intercourse, may we respectfully suggest you see a sexual therapist? You
can then deal with this problem, learn to come more quickly, and avoid
giving her a numb vagina and an intimate knowledge of the exact shade of
color you painted your bedroom ceiling. If you're one of the many men
who lose their erection when the condom comes out of its foil wrapper
and onto the head of your penis, it's back to Google for a search on,
surprisingly enough, "losing erection when putting on a condom".

24 Asking her how it was for her


This is not the mark of a confident lover, so if you really want some
feedback, phrase it thus: "Did you prefer it when I did X or Y?"

25 Not going down on her when she wants oral pleasure


Since oral sex on a woman is so pleasurable for most men, this seems
unlikely. But if it's a question of the smell or taste being a bit much
for you, try taking a shower or bath together before sex. If you just
want her to fellate you and you simply can't be bothered to reciprocate
with cunnilingus, then reading these tips isn't going to help you much
anyway.


26 Failing to give her pleasure if you come quickly


Remember the motto: "Women come first!" As a man, you're probably going
to lose interest in sex once you've ejaculated - at least for a while.
In which case, make sure she comes through oral sex or masturbation
before you enter her. That way, she gets her pleasure and so do you.
(With the added bonus that it doesn't matter so much if you shoot quite
quickly.) Just to enter her, thrust a few times, come, roll over and
forget about her is the mark of a boorish lover, and you wouldn't want
to be one of those, now would you?

27 Trying to force her head towards your ****


Let's face it: she's either willing to give your oral sex or she's not.
Trying to persuade her to get her lips around your glans by edging her
head towards your groin is a bit crass, to say the least. If she doesn't
seem to be heading that way as things hot up, just ask her: "There's
something you could do that'd give me so much pleasure....."

28 Trying to force her head further down on her **** when she's giving
you oral


Yes, once again we know it feels good, but you have to be considerate
about it. She's not likely to be a deep throat expert, and there's no
reason why she should be, since most of the pleasure of oral sex comes
from the action of her tongue on your glans. Keep your hands away from
her head unless it's to gently stroke her hair, and you won't feel the
temptation to encourage her to go deeper.

29 Holding her head when she goes down on you


Pretty similar to number 28, but this time, holding her head and moving
it up and down on your penis is the no-no. If you think that's
acceptable sexual etiquette you've been watching too many of the wrong
kind of films.

30 Coming in her mouth without asking her if it's OK


The taste of semen is very much an acquired taste; unfortunately it's
one that few woman ever acquire. If she doesn't like it, ask her to keep
going until the last minute, then tell her when you're going to come so
she can move back and finish the job with a well-lubed hand. You'll get
just as much pleasure, and she won't have to gag or spit your semen out.
By the way, accidentally forgetting to tell her you're going to come is
not permitted.

31 Thinking that a porno movie has anything to do with real life


Porn is not good for men's egos. Real life isn't like that, OK?

32 Switching on a hard core porn film without asking whether that's OK
with her


Even if you find it arousing, she's not likely to, for the simple reason
that much of the porn available today is fairly abusive to women. Ask
her first, and if you want to share the erotic thrill of watching people
have sex, get hold of some romantic sex movies that will appeal to her
emotions as well as her sex drive.

33 Apologizing for the size of your penis


Just in case you ever feel inclined to apologize for not matching up to
the guys in the wrong kind of movies, just remember: 98% of women would
rather have a sensitive lover than one with a big penis. If you're with
one of the other two percent, you need to find a new lover.

34 Answering honestly when she asks you what your last lover was like


Guys, when a woman asks you if her butt is too big, do you tell her the
truth? Enough said. Your current lover is always the most gorgeous, sexy
and desirable woman around. Even if she doesn't really believe it,
that's what she wants to hear.

35 Asking her if she'd mind if her girlfriend joined you


Threesomes can be exciting, but they usually just cause jealousy and
upset when one partner unexpectedly finds they don't want their partner
making out with another person. Needless to say, this usually happens to
the woman. So be sure, be very sure, you know what you're doing before
you try this one.

36 Making her do all the work


Changing positions is all very well, but asking her to ride you each
time you have sex seems a bit one sided. Vary the positions, have fun,
and take equal shares of the work. Don't just settle for one favorite
position and flog it to death.

37 Trying to slip it in the back door by "accident"


Anal sex is something that a lot fewer couples have tried than you'd
believe from what you read on the internet or see in porn. It's
something you might like to try, but you both have to want to do it.
She's not likely to respond with warmth if you keep pretending you're
poking her anus by accident. And she won't believe you if you tell her
you just didn't want to ask for directions, even if that's how you are
when you're driving around lost, looking for somewhere.

38 Photographing or videoing your lovemaking


Unfortunately, as many jilted lovers can testify, taking pictures while
you enjoy sex is putting power in the hands of the person who has the
pictures. A good compromise is to link your video camera direct to your
TV without recording the images. That way you can have the erotic thrill
of seeing yourself during sex without having to worry about seeing
yourself having sex on the internet in a few years' time.

39 Getting into the same old same old routine every time you have sex


Above almost everything else (except possibly being deeply in love),
ringing the changes when you make love is the thing that will keep your
sex life fresh and passionate. You'll be surprised just how exciting it
can be when you try a new position. This is simply because every
position puts a different pressure on the penis and vagina, or gives you
a new perspective of your partner's body, or perhaps allows you to see
entering your partner's body, and so on. Exactly which sex position
feels most pleasurable will depend on the shape and size and shape of
your penis and her vagina.

40 Not romancing her


Women love romance. Men put up with it, or do it to get sex. True or
false? Probably true, but the romantic "chase" is deeply rewarding for
most men (i.e. seducing and winning a woman makes us feel deeply
fulfilled), and romance is an essential part of that process. If you're
able to continue being romantic once you're an established couple, then
you set yourself head and shoulders above the rest of your fellow men,
and you stand that much greater chance of getting regular, passionate
sex.

41 Slapping her buttocks without checking if she's into a little
dominance play


No mater how exciting you may find the idea, don't land a heavy slap on
her butt without trying a few lighter ones first and seeing how she
reacts. If you do, you may get a slap in the face. Or a kick in the
balls.

42 Trying to do sex by the book (or the film)


Don't copy the moves you see in porn films. They lack a certain
something. Consideration for the woman, that would be.

43 Playing with her anus before she's excited enough to appreciate it


When you're masturbating her clitoris, and you have a finger inside her
vagina, you may find that she responds well to a little anal play. If
you have the position right, you can use your little finger to tickle
gently at her anus as your forefinger plays with her G-spot. This may
well add to her excitement - especially if she's on the verge of orgasm.
If you try this before she's really excited and has stopped caring
what's happening to her, you might just turn her off completely, so it
might not be a bad idea to check it out with her in advance.

44 Deafening her by shouting in her ear when you come


An easy mistake to make, especially if you like to have sex in the man
on top position lying close to your partner, and you like to let the
world know when you come. Unfortunately she won't let you do it a second
time, so bury your face in the pillow or something if you're prone to
uncontrollable vocal ejaculations as well as physical ones.

45 Talking dirty without checking if she likes it


Generally a little consensual dirty talk between adults adds to the
excitement. The first time your partner tells you to f*** her hot wet
c*** you'll see what I mean. If that hasn't happened yet, and you'd like
it to, encourage her to talk dirty to you when you're making love, and
see what pops out of her mouth. You might be surprised. Remember legend
has it that the quiet ones are often the most surprising in bed!

46 Lying on top of her without supporting your weight on your arms


Always remember: a gentleman takes his weight on his arms. Or elbows, or
knees, or something.

47 Ejaculating on her without asking permission


Coming between her breasts or on her vulva or bottom can be incredibly
exciting, but it's nice to ask her first. She may see it less a mark of
your ejaculatory prowess or manhood than a mess to clear up.

48 Not controlling your ejaculation


Like we said before, a good lover makes the effort to make sure his
partner is satisfied before he is.

49 Not spending some time with her in your arms after sex


A man who gets up after he's done the business and sets about his daily
routine is probably top of most women's sexual dislikes. For her, this
is a special time when a woman feels very close to her partner. She
takes much longer to come down from sex than a man does, she wants to
know she's loved and special, and she wants to feel adored by the man to
whom she has just given her most precious asset. The very least you can
do is to spend a half hour or so cuddling her while you relax after
making love, even if you're not going to spend the night with her.

50 Not cleaning up after sex


And since sex inevitably involves a certain amount of fluids, keep the
tissues handy for afterwards. If you feel like being chivalrous, offer
her a warm towel to clean herself, especially if you aren't using
condoms.

There you go! And if you've got any more sexual tips for sexual success,
send them to us at the email address in the box below.

lol

damn, u want me to clean and tell my girlfriend she can join. what
CRAZINESS is this ...lol

LOL

Whisper...

you have way too much time on yer hands

well well well if it isn't miss"know-it-all".i hate to burst your
bubble girl but you more than likely do not know S#$t about us men.i
noticed that you are only still a kid (26).in my books anyway. i have
been around some horrible situations girl. i am 33. my first wife was
highly abusive towards me. so don't go to the 1950's women's lib crap
like you are.try being a guy that is married to a woman that will not
give you space at all.

LOL you got that one right mike....lol. Not much you can do when you are
buzzing and your man lives in another country...lol.

oh my!
Not bad advise, but by the time you finished reading him all the rules,
there goes the all the potential passion.

who says men need passion?

Yea honestly they are just happy that we want to give it to them...lol.

LL...
I'm a man who like for a woman to give me passion...

What planet do you live on?

These were just as good as Lunatics!

Hey!! Great post!! Those are sooooooo true. Even though it'd be a pain
to cite them to a man to make sure he did things right... LOL!!! But if
you think about it, it's all pretty much common sense if you put
yourself in her place and think of how you would like to have someone
make love to you then you'll have no trouble pleasing us women at all.