Community > Dating & Relationships

Topic: I don't get it...
whow Joined Thu 05/15/08 Posts: 100	Thu 05/22/08 08:05 PM
I know this question has been asked before...but still... I DON'T GET IT!! How come you can email back and forth with a guy, IM, and talk on the phone...plan to meet.things seem to really click..then he backs off with some excuse, work or something....then fades into the night without a word....DON'T WASTE MY TIME!!!! So sorry (((((hugs))))) I'm am sort of glad that aparently I'm not the only one this happened to...... Still sucks though I took it as a lesson learned. I'll be a LOT more careful next time. Just have to be careful not to get too cynical. Some of us naturally pour our hearts completely into things and this can be a very painful way to live, as early back as the formative years. And I think that's just it, an appropriate amount of cynicism is the key ingredient toward achieving a good balance between being completely vulnerable and completely jaded.

symbelmyne Joined Mon 01/14/08 Posts: 5356	Thu 05/22/08 08:06 PM
one word: PLAYER

moofooga Joined Thu 01/31/08 Posts: 25515	Thu 05/22/08 08:23 PM
I know this question has been asked before...but still... I DON'T GET IT!! How come you can email back and forth with a guy, IM, and talk on the phone...plan to meet.things seem to really click..then he backs off with some excuse, work or something....then fades into the night without a word....DON'T WASTE MY TIME!!!! There are plenty of women who are guilty of this, too. In fact, I've had this happen a number of times- they chat up a storm, turn up the cutesy-kissy face, and then all-of-a-sudden vanish in thin air. They (men AND wimmins included) are probably ADHD-addled attention whores who latch on to anything they can find, and then suddenly feel the need to latch off. It IS a major waste of time, though.

DQ66 Joined Fri 11/16/07 Posts: 803	Thu 05/22/08 09:01 PM
I know this question has been asked before...but still... I DON'T GET IT!! How come you can email back and forth with a guy, IM, and talk on the phone...plan to meet.things seem to really click..then he backs off with some excuse, work or something....then fades into the night without a word....DON'T WASTE MY TIME!!!! So sorry (((((hugs))))) I'm am sort of glad that aparently I'm not the only one this happened to...... Still sucks though I took it as a lesson learned. I'll be a LOT more careful next time. Just have to be careful not to get too cynical. Some of us naturally pour our hearts completely into things and this can be a very painful way to live, as early back as the formative years. And I think that's just it, an appropriate amount of cynicism is the key ingredient toward achieving a good balance between being completely vulnerable and completely jaded. And that's a very hard balance to find..... (I hate being cynical )

Gypsy41 Joined Tue 05/15/07 Posts: 123359	Fri 05/23/08 01:03 AM
I know this question has been asked before...but still... I DON'T GET IT!! How come you can email back and forth with a guy, IM, and talk on the phone...plan to meet.things seem to really click..then he backs off with some excuse, work or something....then fades into the night without a word....DON'T WASTE MY TIME!!!! I think he is scared..........scared of his feelings and that freaks him out!!! btw........1-800-gypsyknows!!!

Kravin Joined Mon 12/17/07 Posts: 161	Fri 05/23/08 01:04 AM
I know this question has been asked before...but still... I DON'T GET IT!! How come you can email back and forth with a guy, IM, and talk on the phone...plan to meet.things seem to really click..then he backs off with some excuse, work or something....then fades into the night without a word....DON'T WASTE MY TIME!!!! I think he is scared..........scared of his feelings and that freaks him out!!! btw........1-800-gypsyknows!!! Tottally agree

Gypsy41 Joined Tue 05/15/07 Posts: 123359	Fri 05/23/08 01:36 AM
ya and if it continues..........time to cut the ties!!!

Gypsy41 Joined Tue 05/15/07 Posts: 123359	Fri 05/23/08 01:37 AM
<--too old to be playing little kid games.......

Beachfarmer Joined Tue 04/17/07 Posts: 24649	Fri 05/23/08 01:38 AM
Brad Pitt is really Rodney Dangerfield

longhairbiker Joined Tue 09/04/07 Posts: 26589	Fri 05/23/08 02:02 AM
I know this question has been asked before...but still... I DON'T GET IT!! How come you can email back and forth with a guy, IM, and talk on the phone...plan to meet.things seem to really click..then he backs off with some excuse, work or something....then fades into the night without a word....DON'T WASTE MY TIME!!!! first off its a computer dating site. Check your expectations. Secondly, doesn't it make sense to get to know someone before you decide if you are compatible and want to go further? Sheesh! Too many people want instant coffee, instant cake, and instant relationships. Throwing practicality and caution to the wind isn't smart or safe. Yeah go ahead and blame me. She seemed nice, wanted to get to know her better, and converse more. Then she started to talk about the voices in her head and her bi-polar disorder, her fetish for playing with knives, and her last 3 hospitalized ex boyfreinds. Yeah I disappeared right now when I discovered she was CRAZY! What am I supposed to do? Write her a email saying "I'm sorry, you're nuttier than a granola bar, your wreckless, dangerous, and should be committed. But it was nice talking to you. You scare me?" sorry, just a different point of view.

longhairbiker Joined Tue 09/04/07 Posts: 26589	Fri 05/23/08 02:02 AM
I know this question has been asked before...but still... I DON'T GET IT!! How come you can email back and forth with a guy, IM, and talk on the phone...plan to meet.things seem to really click..then he backs off with some excuse, work or something....then fades into the night without a word....DON'T WASTE MY TIME!!!! first off its a computer dating site. Check your expectations. Secondly, doesn't it make sense to get to know someone before you decide if you are compatible and want to go further? Sheesh! Too many people want instant coffee, instant cake, and instant relationships. Throwing practicality and caution to the wind isn't smart or safe. Yeah go ahead and blame me. She seemed nice, wanted to get to know her better, and converse more. Then she started to talk about the voices in her head and her bi-polar disorder, her fetish for playing with knives, and her last 3 hospitalized ex boyfreinds. Yeah I disappeared right now when I discovered she was CRAZY! What am I supposed to do? Write her a email saying "I'm sorry, you're nuttier than a granola bar, your wreckless, dangerous, and should be committed. But it was nice talking to you. You scare me?" sorry, just a different point of view.

Gypsy41 Joined Tue 05/15/07 Posts: 123359	Fri 05/23/08 02:06 AM


Gypsy41 Joined Tue 05/15/07 Posts: 123359	Fri 05/23/08 02:07 AM
<----talks to cats daily.................AND THEY TALK BACK!!!

DQ66 Joined Fri 11/16/07 Posts: 803	Fri 05/23/08 06:14 AM
I know this question has been asked before...but still... I DON'T GET IT!! How come you can email back and forth with a guy, IM, and talk on the phone...plan to meet.things seem to really click..then he backs off with some excuse, work or something....then fades into the night without a word....DON'T WASTE MY TIME!!!! first off its a computer dating site. Check your expectations. Secondly, doesn't it make sense to get to know someone before you decide if you are compatible and want to go further? Sheesh! Too many people want instant coffee, instant cake, and instant relationships. Throwing practicality and caution to the wind isn't smart or safe. Yeah go ahead and blame me. She seemed nice, wanted to get to know her better, and converse more. Then she started to talk about the voices in her head and her bi-polar disorder, her fetish for playing with knives, and her last 3 hospitalized ex boyfreinds. Yeah I disappeared right now when I discovered she was CRAZY! What am I supposed to do? Write her a email saying "I'm sorry, you're nuttier than a granola bar, your wreckless, dangerous, and should be committed. But it was nice talking to you. You scare me?" sorry, just a different point of view. What's wrong with being honest Oh, I forgot, we're on line. I get what you're saying but do we have to check decency and good manners along with expectations at the door? I'm sure plenty of us are not crazy. And I'd prefer a call or a short email saying:"changed my mind". You can still block me after that

No1sLove Joined Wed 04/16/08 Posts: 10342	Fri 05/23/08 06:24 AM
I assume that all of you are teenagers playing at adult relationships until proven otherwise. I like to think I'm a good judge of character and that all of my friends are true blue. One very bosom buddy did skate without a trace last week ...so who really knows?

ddn122 Joined Mon 11/05/07 Posts: 12855	Fri 05/23/08 06:26 AM
if you have never met.....????? i don't think you can be "close" friends........it's just a casual "relationship" ....................... just my opinion.....

No1sLove Joined Wed 04/16/08 Posts: 10342	Fri 05/23/08 06:29 AM
I know this question has been asked before...but still... I DON'T GET IT!! How come you can email back and forth with a guy, IM, and talk on the phone...plan to meet.things seem to really click..then he backs off with some excuse, work or something....then fades into the night without a word....DON'T WASTE MY TIME!!!! There are plenty of women who are guilty of this, too. In fact, I've had this happen a number of times- they chat up a storm, turn up the cutesy-kissy face, and then all-of-a-sudden vanish in thin air. They (men AND wimmins included) are probably ADHD-addled attention whores who latch on to anything they can find, and then suddenly feel the need to latch off. It IS a major waste of time, though. I think a lot of ppl here tend to "kissy-face" with more than one interest at a time and when they make their choice...the rest suddenly become disposable. This is no different really than dating in the flesh for some, but to those like myself who normally would not spend time with players, it's more easily hidden here. I would be very suspicious of this from what I've seen from the sidelines, if I ever thought to actually date someone from here.

No1sLove Joined Wed 04/16/08 Posts: 10342	Fri 05/23/08 06:41 AM
if you have never met.....????? i don't think you can be "close" friends........it's just a casual "relationship" ....................... just my opinion..... I feel that sharing intimate details of your life, hopes and dreams, bond ppl no matter what form it takes. I know for a fact that there ARE real ppl with real feelings on the receiving end of my emails, whether they be completely upfront or not. I have the luxury of my attitude on this more than others, as I am not dating...so I'm only wasting my own time if they are not legitimate friends.