"In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity
from
employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained
through
our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T)

We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T than anyone else. If
you
feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T on the course, please
see your supervisor. You will be immediately placed at the top of the
S.H.I.T list, and our supervisors are especially skilled at seeing you
get
all the S. H. I. T. you can handle.

Employees who dont take their S. H. I.T. will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL
EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T).

Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T seriously will have to go to
EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T). Since our supervisors took
S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they dont have to do S.H.I.T anymore,
and are all full of S.H.I.T already. If you are full of S.H.I.T, you may
be
interested in a job teaching others. We can add your name to our BASIC
UNDERSTANDING LIST of LEADERS (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T).

For employees who are intending to pursue a career in management and
consulting, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL
OPERATIONAL
RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T). This course emphasizes how to
manage
M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T

If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF
TEACHING,
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T).


Thank you,

BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING

(B.I.G.S.H.I.T)


P.S. Now send this S.H.I.T to a few people who need S.H.I.T in their
life,
just not the same person who sent you this S.H.I.T They have already had
their fill of S.H.I.T Thank you for your time.


Sincerely,

The Director Under the Main Bureau of Super High Intensity Training.(The
D.U.M.B.S.H.I.T)."

Welll....... what can you say..... but give another point of view.. So
here goes

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?
.... We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100%.

How about achieving 103% ?

Herein is one answer.

A little math that might prove helpful.

What really is this 100%?

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26


Then,

H A R D W O R K
8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98%

And,

K N O W L E D G E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96%

But,

A T T I T U D E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100%

And,

B U L L S H I T
2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%

So dude.... it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge will get
you close, attitude will get you there, but bull**** will put you over
the top.

So guys, if you are not there, you better add some more "S--T"

Ask an adman, he will explain it to you in detail..