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Topic: Question
TheShadow's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:12 PM
Ok this is not what i'm going through right now but I have in the past
and I'm just looking for opinions on it

If you like someone and I mean really like someon How do you handle it
as far as not jumping into it to quick

Morena350's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:13 PM
establish a good relationship to get to know eachother
and then let them know you care!!

Ms_Scorpio71's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:14 PM
take things slow no matter how much u like them just keep telling
yourself I don't want to get hurt in this so I must take this slow

EmotionalTurbulance's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:14 PM
breath...

walk around.

feel it...

songbirrd's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:14 PM
Good question Shadow I think I'd like to see everyone's opinion on this
because I think I may need help in that area.It's so hard not to just
rush in but then if you do it never turns out right.

FallinAngel82's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:15 PM
just stick with it.. stay friends at first and slowly move into a deeper
relationship if its what the both of you are wanting..

BigGlenn's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:16 PM
Don't jump in too quick.




ohwell

Sorry buddy,
But did you expect a serious answer from me?

creationsfire's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:19 PM
I'd like to know the answer to this question too............so advise
anyone?

jeanc200358's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:19 PM
To me, I'm not entirely convinced how quickly or how slowly you jump
into something is going to make that much of a difference.

I mean, for one thing..if you like them, if you really, really like
them..you already have an emotional attachment to them.

So say you "get to know them." Well, you ALREADY know them enough to
"like them, to really, really like them."

Hence, you've already "jumped into it."

You can always jump back out of it should you find they did not meet
your expectations.

lazyj321's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:20 PM
jump.. jump.. jump..

LAMom's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:20 PM
Hmmmmmmmmm Mom is just going to sit on the sidelines and take all info
collected with her.:smile:

OnALark's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:23 PM
Shadow, take it slowly; if it's meant to happen, it will. Give her the
room to make some of the calls. I've been there; the more comfortable a
woman feels, the better she will make you feel.

sliptnfell's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:27 PM
Sometimes you can't help but jump to quickly. The big thing you have to
ask yourself is what you want in a relationship... ie. long term, not
serious, etc. Next you have to put into perspective the ramifications of
moving fast. I've been through the same ordeals and my next attempt I'm
going the friends route for a solid month prior. Procrastinating has two
great benefits. 1.) You actually get to know that person's flaws and
character. (I swear 90% of the women I've jumped to quickly with have
turned out to be psychotic!) 2.) The anticipation is great! After you've
both been longing to move forward and you finally decide to do so it has
to add that much more heat! Just my opinion. Good Luck.

sweetcountrygirl's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:28 PM
okay...speaking from real experience.....

Take
Your
Time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When you "rush", the anticipation dissipitates...
When you rush, you have paraticular expectations...
STOP and think, Evaluate...
Does this person "really" meet all expectations of what I really want in
a mate...or ask yourself...am i just lonely and tired of searching?
IF this is "the one", he/she will still be "the one" in a month, or 6
months...and he/she will understand why you don't want to rush...
You can never ask too many questions...
Feel out the situation...
and be sure...
(although there is never a guarantee of how things will go, we all have
some innate consciousness of how things should feel)

just my 9,000,000,000...cents worth...LLOL!!!

JaneBond's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:50 PM
lol slip....some common sense when you learn from mistakes.

Nothing wrong with getting to know the person and what makes them who
they are, all the rest falls into place, no?

jeanc200358's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:52 PM
I don't think one should "rush," but I don't think they should go
altogether that slowly, either.

Anticipation, while a source of excitement for some, is a source of
stress for me. I'm pretty much an "on the spot" decision-maker and,
sure, I've made some bad decisions. But when it comes to picking men,
whether or not I waited would have made very little significant
difference in the outcome of the relationship.

Oftentimes hindsight is 20/20. Most problems in a relationship manifest
themselves once the relationship gets going, not while you're in the
getting-to-know you stage.

So many people start off liking each other, it seems, but come to a
stalemate as to whether or not to move on, and end up out-paranoing each
other into convincing themselves there's probably some reason it won't
work out.

I think one should try to ascertain that said person is not a serial
killer or anything like that, ensure you have enough in common to hold
each other's interests and, once all that is established, SOGOTP.

If it's gonna work, it's gonna work; if it's not, it's not.

Why create all that added stress by wondering whether or not it's going
to? Try it and find out!

TheShadow's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:52 PM
Well this is getting intersting lol I say be yourself and if you both
feel the same way go with the flow but at times there is one that neds
to go slower then the other and that is where it gets interesting

See that it's self could mean all kinds of things as far as what might
be to fast for someone and the problem with that is some people don';t
know how to commuincate so you end up getting what we call the lines as
another topic was brought up about it "I'm not sure if I'm ready" "It's
not you I got my own issuse to deal with" "I like you but" etc etc

jeanc200358's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:54 PM
slip, I'd be willing to be ya they were not "psychotic," but they just
had different expectations than you did.

You do have to establish at the least that you're on the same
page..communication is key. But after that, I say go for it.

drinker

jeanc200358's photo
Sun 04/15/07 03:58 PM
Shadow, I agree..but you know what really trips my pissy switch?

It's for someone to say they're interested but then say they want to
take it slow and then getting very little to any feedback as to what, if
any, progression there might be. We're not mindreaders; you have to tell
us. Where is your head at? What are you thinking? Have you made any
progress in your decision-making process? And the bad thing is, if we
get to a point we HAVE to ask, then that's frustrating as hell and
almost ruins the relationship right there.

I don't embark upon a relationship without naturally assuming it could
develop into something more serious.

But if I'm just "going out" with a guy, then such issues never even come
up.

TheShadow's photo
Sun 04/15/07 04:25 PM
WoW you hit the nail Jeanc bigsmile I really agree with you and
knowing if you do have to ask it's better to let it go then to try to
fish questions out of someone that is not going to work with you and
maybe give some answers

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