After returning from his honeymoon in Florida with his new
bride,Virginia.

Luigi stopped by his old barbershop in Jersey to say hello to his
friends.

Giovanni said, "Hey Luigi, how wasa da treep?"

Luigi said, "Everyting wasa perfecto except for da train ride down."

Whata you mean, Luigi?" asked Giovanni.

"Well, we boarda da train at Grana Central Station. My beautiful
Virginia, she pack a biga basket a food. She broughta da vino, some nice
cigars for me, and we were lookina forward to da trip, and open upa da
luncha basket.

The conductore comea by, waga his finger at us anda say, 'no eat
indisa car.

Musta use a dining car.'

So, me and my beautiful Virginia, we go to a dining car, eat a biga
lunch and starta ta open da bottle of a nice a vino!

Conductore walka by again, waga his finger and say, 'No drinka in disa
car!

Musta use a cluba car.'

So, we go to cluba car. While a drinkina da vino, I starta to lighta my
biga cigar.

The conductore, he waga his finger again and say, 'No a smokina disa
car. Musta go to a smokina car.'

We go to a smokina car and I smoke a my biga cigar.

Then my beautiful Virginia and I, we go to a sleeper car anda go to bed.
We just about to go boombada boombada and the conductore, he walka
through da hall shouting ata top of his a voice...

'Nofolka Virginia! Nofolka Virginia!'

Nexta time, I'ma just gonna taka da bus!!