we all want diffrent things

Women are taught to be loyal? it is that simple? the bible tells us to summit to your wife and husband, and to Honor them and respect them no matter what and that even a look from a glance is called "lust" so a lot of women ... NOT ALL! but some, believe showing this person that there will not be any influences on the out side in so no one can come on here an talk her out of the relationship.

I always stop my internet sites, close them all down and I do not return for the period of time.. But once the man's foot was out the door it was fair game!

I would start all over again. Never bothered me not once, I gave a few the chance, I opened the door for the ones I liked it was them that got to choose a life with me or not!

now if they closed there site was up to them It never bothered me as long at my integrity was in my own heart that was all i cared.

but some felt they needed to prove something or loyalty to show me they loved me only.. and shut there sites down... Which was stupid in my eyes... because they did not know even if they would like my life style? but they did go and re open new ones.. after a few years.. Haa haa

I don't have any "on-line" girl friends, but MANY real-life girl friends. I would never talk about my relationship problems with any one of them. Period. Maybe some of the superficial stuff with my guy friends (boy, was she pissed about ....)

Personally, I think it crosses a line. And if any one of them starts to bad-talk their husband or boyfriend to me I always play devil's advocate and stick up for the dude.

I don't think I lack confidence, I just think there are certain problems between a man and woman that you don't want discussed with their friends. It's too personal. It betrays trust.

We all sit here at the computer reading all these sites making judgments to help one another.

There is a confident in a man that is true but were you place that is up to the man.

If you are overly assertive, forceful, opinionated, love the sound of your own voice and have an air of superiority simply because you have good looks, skill or “luck” in a particular area of life, You may even start a relationship but it does not last long.

From what seems like out of nowhere, the other person starts giving you excuses (like “my ex” wants us to get back together, or my business needs me, or I am falling in love with you and it’s distracting me from x or y, or you are too good looking/smart to want to go out with someone like me etc), anything to avoid seeing or being with you.

This is the kind of confidence that is to be avoided..

this is also for women the same.... ME ME ME! lol

She is deactivating her myspace because a guy doesnt have confidence in himself?

That's what i got out of it

or maybe she just wants to stop! women make excuses all the time for many reason. When she feels threatened, or feels its too much to handle and is using the MAN as a excuse to get herself out of a situation that she herself got herself into.. happens all the time?

Don't just blame the man! I am sure he might not know anything about any of this and at the last min. she throws this back in his face.

I LOVED YOU AND I SHUT DOWN MY MYSPACE FOR YOU... BLA BLA BLA
WHINNNNYYYYYIIINNNGGGGG.... WAAAAAA

Excuses.... pile up after a while! Don't they!

dude you want attention - jump up and down while screaming like a banshee

you want something that will last - be yourself, be confident, have a good heart, be caring, be positive, be real, be honest... any one of these alone will get a girls attention but all combined will keep da girl.

good luck

Yes, kinda sounds like she is trying to get someone to leave her alone and stop stalking her

Very insightful post.

Confidence within yourself does not quarentee you will get your way all the time, silly. Being confident is an attractor but there has to be a MUTUAL attraction to start something with someone.

She is currently involved with someone else. Nothing you can do about that except accept that everyone has the right to choose who they want to be with and move on if ain't you.

I can't be sure without hearing her side but I would imagine that there are several reasons for closeing done her My Space page or other on line sites.

She might just be tired of the BS that goes on line for most females; the rude emails, people sticking her nose in her business, guys who say they are friends but are really just trying to get their foot in the door, guys who won't back off when they are clearly being told that she wants to end whatever relationship that might have existed.

But IMHO the main one is a matter of RESPECT for the relationship once it gets to a certain level. I personally don't think it is inapproriate for someone to expect a certain level of boundries for themself and a partner. Being on a date sites, even as nice as Mingle2 is for interesting conversation, would be one I would drop and expect my partner to drop.

It is my personal choice but if I have a relationship I am NOT about to announce it and discuss it on line in open forums until it is well established or ended and pretty much only superficially then. Not only is that a violation of my privacy I consider it bad form to develope a relationship as a kiss and tell or to advertise the details of your personal failures. There is a Chinese proverb paraphrased that goes "speak softly of all choices because they reflect on your judgement" which I find very true.

That said I know there is a certain number of folks that do not have friend or family near by or wish to have the input of disconnected persons to make decisions. I am not sure that is enirely a bad idea because sometimes people who you percieve as friends or a lover don't always express what is in your best interest. Disconnected third parties are often more truthful or experienced or know of resources. And some questions are not necessarily comfortable or wise to discuss with family or friends. HOWEVER every person here is and ADULT and if you give your power of decision making over to someone you neither know or can verify their credentials then you are foolish.

The OP asks if this friend's attraction to the potential relation versus him is about his lack of confidence or maybe the exhibition of something other than confidence in the boyfriend selected.

My guess it probably a host of reasons about the potential boyfriend and probably not a lot to do with the guy overlooked.

Younger women usually are attracted by a guy who

A) Makes a good physical presentation; you can't dress and groom like a slob and get a lot of attention, Standing up straight, smileing, spending a few bucks on a good haircut, keeping clean shaven, and wearing approriate clothes in good condition will improve your chance. Guys who try to create a look usually flop as being lame. Being a clone of someone else or the crowd makes you forgetable.

B) Good Manners help. No matter how great you look, how much money you throw around, or how much she is attracted to you if you are inconsiderate, innattentive, rude, and or offensive sooner or later a woman will tire of it. Women do notice guys who have good manners. Looking her straight in the eye, offering a handshake, opening a door, saying thank you, and checking your vulgar language makes you stand out.

C) Being active, having interests, developeing at least minimal social skills makes you fun to be with. You do not have to be an " A-String" athlete, or Kevin Bacon on the dance floor, or Prince Charming at the Dinner table, or even a comedian but brushing up your basic skills: making them habit; and having a few things to talk about makes you a lot more fun to be with. 90% of being a good conversationalist is useing your mouth and ears in the porportion that nature gives them.

Example; Women don't remember how a guy dances but they all want to dance with the guy who has enough moxie to ask and try to make it look like it is a privilege for them to say yes. If you escort her out on the dance floor, keep your hands off her bikini zone, avoid looking down her blouse, actually smile at her rather than scouting out another woman, escort her back, and say something similiar to thank you it pretty much guarantee's your odds of additional dance partners. Guys who make women set on their heels, fending off pigs all evening long, after knocking themselves out to look their best are not going to be recieved real friendly come closeing time or when they try to get a number to ask for a date that they figure will be similiarly boreing.

D) I know this is hard to believe; the guys who actually ASK for a date. I don't mean a kind of, sorta, vague; and self demeaning or left hand invitation like "If you aren't doing anything would you like to go out?" First you still haven't made and actually invitation but you have insulted your potential date by assumeing you are the only one interested in having her time. So you have set yourself up with basiclly zero chance. Now if you know what you would like to have her join you doing, where, and when and it sounds even minimally interesting you have upped your odds to 50-50 yes or no. If you pick something that is safe, non threatening, and actually desireable with a polite lead time 48 to 72 hours; maybe even longer if you are suggesting a weekend or you know she has kids. It also helps if you ask a person when an invitation is not showing off, doesn't make them distracted from their responsibilities (job or kids), and you have actually made and effort to know a little about them than their appearance, or their basic stats. Women generally consider and invitation from and absolute stranger to a woman who is a stranger is so generic that it seems desperate, or that you think you are God's gift to the world, or just lazy.

Last and not least is if a young guy wants to have a girlfriend they have to invest a certain amount of time, effort, and money on a regular basis. I am not suggesting massive amounts but if you ask a girl out then wait until you get around to it to ask her again she will not reserve herself on a possibility. This doesn't mean promiseing forever amen but you like someone and want them in your future you have to at times suggest they can anticipate seeing you. Sometimes; especially early on if you mean it, it is nice to say something like "I am having a good time and we ought to do this again."